Anti Moonboy

Anti Moonboy News - #73 - Disclosures

xenu@antimoonboy.com (xenu) — Mon, 01 Jun 2026 11:57:27 -0400

Episode 73 is now live! In today’s episode we discuss the growing drama between Nightmare Eclipse and Microsoft. We also tackle Exolix’s API vulnerability, and Saylor selling BTC.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wnFv_a_00l4 https://odysee.com/@anti_moonboy:7/amn73:8 https://antimoonboy.com/podcast/dir2cast/amn73.mp3 (note: rumble is currently down, will upload at a later point)

Timestamps:

0:00 Introduction

1:34 Nightmare Eclipse Saga - A real Windows backdoor that Windows is ignoring?

8:45 The Register article: https://www.theregister.com/security/2026/05/28/microsoft-0-day-feud-escalates-as-researcher-threatens-another-windows-exploit-dump/5248085

14:12 Nightmare Eclipse threatens exploit in June?

16:22 This weeks sponsors featuring my neighbor Tony!!!!!!!!

16:37 webwipe.io

17:28 monero.forum

18:08 unstoppable.money

18:41 anonraffle.com

19:27 orangefren.com

20:13 eigenwallet exploit update https://xcancel.com/xenumonero/status/2060433863504253266

22:25 Exolix exploit - $40m in Exolix swaps exposed via api vuln https://www.rastersec.com/blog/exolix-swapper-dump

23:58 You shouldn’t trust coinswap services. They collect your data. Read their privacy policies,

31:37 Rastersec blogpost about Exolix vuln: https://www.rastersec.com/blog/exolix-swapper-dump

37:12 Breaking News: Saylor sell 32 BTC

https://xcancel.com/WatcherGuru/status/2061418961787408822

38:37 Breaking News: Thorchain pulls a Microsoft stiffs security researcher who has found multiple critical vulnerabilities https://xcancel.com/v12sec/status/2061401842324820205

41:47 Zama stablecoin wrapper censors transaction

https://xcancel.com/randhindi/status/2060671833674797162

45:32 Rage article on Bitcoin Mining in America act.

https://www.therage.co/mined-in-america-act-bitcoin-at-risk/

52:55 Zcash’s pump and dump and highlighting their lack of usage

57:17 My channel’s performance during the bear market

59:36 Superchat 1 - Monero Marathon

01:00:30 Superchat 2 - Thoughts on Saylor’s sale

01:03:32 Outro - Boards of Canada - 5.8.78

Anti Moonboy News - #71 - Another Heist

xenu@antimoonboy.com (xenu) — Mon, 18 May 2026 18:59:02 -0400

Links: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J0sGXd38wEE https://antimoonboy.com/podcast/dir2cast/amn71.mp3 https://odysee.com/@anti_moonboy:7/amn71:3 https://rumble.com/v7a1p84-anti-moonboy-news-71-another-heist.html

In this one, we go over a bunch of exploits, including Thorchain, Mullvad, and Windows Bitlocker. Enjoy!

Timestamps:

0:00 Introduction

1:18 Thorchain gets exploited

https://www.coindesk.com/tech/2026/05/15/thorchain-halts-trading-after-usd10-million-cross-chain-exploit-rune-token-drops-12

https://xcancel.com/zacodil/status/2055550712390541666

15:41 Sponsor: monero.forum

16:35 Sponsor: orangefren.com

17:22 Sponsor: unstoppable.money

18:16 Sponsor: anonraffle.com

19:03 Sponsor: webwipe.io

20:01 Story about father xenu getting locked out of his computer by Bitlocker

23:46 Major Windows exploit released - Yellow Keycd

https://www.tomshardware.com/tech-industry/cyber-security/microsoft-bitlocker-protected-drives-can-now-be-opened-with-just-some-files-on-a-usb-stick-yellowkey-zero-day-exploit-demonstrates-an-apparent-backdoor

33:03 Mullvad exploit

https://tmctmt.com/posts/mullvad-exit-ips-as-a-fingerprinting-vector/

https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=48145679

37:47 Monero Beta Stressnet breaks and may require a rollback

https://github.com/seraphis-migration/monero/pull/391

43:27 Pro Law Enforcement Bill Clarity Passed out of Committee

https://www.therage.co/clarity-act-senate-banking/

55:51 Superchat: Anti Moonboy Subscription Model

59:42 Superchat: Veracrypt No Longer Accepting XMR Decision

01:03:06 Outro: Mall Grab - Bear Witness

Anti Moonboy News - #70 - I sold my kidney

xenu@antimoonboy.com (xenu) — Tue, 12 May 2026 22:01:37 -0400

We are back this Tuesday night with another big podcast. In this one I tackle how darkfi has really degraded over the past year, I cover Saylor’s admission of selling his Bitcoin, and talk about Justin Berman’s interview with Doug, which highlights much of the current news around XMR. Check it out now!

Timestamps:

0:00 Introduction

1:48 My criticisms on DarkFi - No tokenomics, darkirc isn’t good,

13:14 Rant on John Mcafee

17:53 Sponsor: monero.forum

18:48 Sponsor: anonraffle.com

19:48 Sponsor: orangefren.com

20:45 Sponsor: webwipe.io

21:46 Sponsor: unstoppable.money and swap.unstoppable.money

22:48 Show update - Sponsor slots will be capped at 6 minutes with no plans on increasing the amount of sponsors unless the show grows in length.

24:04 Saylor’s admits he is going to sell Bitcoin

33:52 Chart comparing Strategy to ponzis

https://xcancel.com/great_martis/status/2051812356116955185

38:33 Giving a summary of the fantastic interview between Doug Tuman and Justin Berman https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M2rbsjTSFt8

39:29 New view keys

43:18 Alpha and Beta Stressnet, lag from node operators not updating to v 19 hardfork, transaction sync will take a longer time, ten block lock, altruistic proof of stake with no rewards, transactions are going to take longer to send (especially with more uxtos).

47:22 When are fcmp++ going to be done? Biggest delays

research audits - all in process code audits - not done yet but soon beta stressnet hardware wallet integration multisig

49:58 Rollbacks, and Quantum proof

52:00 Waygu being obnoxious

53:45 Superchat: Staying anon using the clearnet

Superchat: Gambling on monero.forum [robot skit]

Links:

mp3: https://antimoonboy.com/podcast/dir2cast/amn70.mp3

Merch: https://antimoonboy.com/merch/

Read/Listen to Darknet Market Maximalism: https://antimoonboy.com/darknetmarketmaximalism

Superchats (will be read at the start of Anti Moonboy News each week): xmrchat.com/xenu

RSS: https://antimoonboy.com/podcast/dir2cast/dir2cast.php

Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/4M1KJthFiJLqXo3VkhfJHz

XMR Donation Address: 84tVkJ6zAHyEpE8yBmkdVtY9s85DLmAwqX4uAdDsswHn4aRw7HpdEabfWigs8Y5QQRarqLj1TLZha38mjHTYJABUHEzgPTA

Where to follow:

twitter.com/xenumonero

nostr: npub16yesreyely5fkxyvas4xv223w7daf3zmqcrz5dw6yckk3azvrk3qaa90ll

Odysee: https://odysee.com/@anti_moonboy:7

Rumble: https://rumble.com/user/AntiMoonboy

Website back up! Also new episode - Anti Moonboy News 68 - Centralized DeFi

xenu@antimoonboy.com (xenu) — Mon, 27 Apr 2026 22:11:07 -0400

Hello all, Apologies about the site being down for the past month. I am still trying to get a server upgrade but this has run into complications. Ideally I will have all my mp3s uploaded on here, but for now we will have to deal with my 10 gb limitation. Additionally, I am likely no longer going to maintain a directory on each page. This is extremely tedious to make hyperlinks for every episode and instead a simple link to my channels and rss feed will suffice. I will continue putting up these weekly posts though with timestamps and to announce new episodes. Lastly, episodes 64-67, all previously released, are available on all my channels. I will not be making new posts for these.

Anyways, this weeks episode covers the major North Korea hack and Thorchain. It’s a good one. Here are the timestamps:

0:00 Introduction

2:02 KelpDAO exploit and Layerzero

7:24 Layer Zero’s incompetence

https://xcancel.com/LayerZero_Core/status/2046081551574983137

14:23 More regulations and blaming North Korea for having bad privacy infrastructure

21:18 Thorchain and how it is the biggest thing for Monero Moonboyism in a while

25:14 Thoughts on Thorchain and their vibecoded Monero implementation

28:10 Secret Thorchain admin keys and their gaslighting on this topic is a red flag

https://archive.is/WiwUT

34:10 It’s highly likely Thorchain founders will be indicted at some point.

40:40 Sponsor: Monerica.com

41:50 Sponsor: webwipe.io

42:45 Big shoutout to SirJamzAlot/brainchainz for building xenuc https://github.com/brainchainz/XMRMenuCalc

44:22 DeFI United pools together money to pay back KelpDAO and Arbitrum freezes $73 million of ETH tied to exploit

45:28 In response to KelpDAO exploint, Wagyu temporarily shuts down https://xcancel.com/PerpetualCow/status/2047060295667867806

51:28 Introducing the monero shamelist at moneroshamelist.com

01:02:39 Litecoin has a 13 block reorg https://xcancel.com/litecoin/status/2048135554445832542

01:07:52 MRL discusses post quantum options for Monero https://xcancel.com/MoneroResearchL/status/2047436910210261359

01:13:03 Superchat - anonraffle.com

Anti Moonboy News 63 - Verification

xenu@antimoonboy.com (xenu) — Mon, 16 Mar 2026 16:52:39 -0400

Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble | mp3

Timestamps:

0:00 Introduction

2:25 Age Verification boiling frog

3:56 California Assembly Bill 1043

https://leginfo.legislature.ca.gov/faces/billTextClient.xhtml?bill_id=202520260AB1043

https://www.tomshardware.com/software/operating-systems/california-introduces-age-verification-law

17:24 Meta heavily lobbying the App Store Accountability Act

https://tboteproject.com/

21:02 Use https://agelesslinux.org/ to keep track of this age verification issue!

30:15 Paid Programming - Webwipe.io, xmrhub.org

34:03 AI Slop throwing a wrench into the Israel/US vs Iran war. Will video evidence be useless in the future?

39:52 Meta ends e2e encryption on instagram

https://help.instagram.com/491565145294150

42:06 Tinder AI requests to see your pictures for “Chemistry” feature

45:15 Robot skit

46:26 Monerorun 2026

47:36 FCMP++ delay until Q4 2026 looking more likely

https://github.com/seraphis-migration/monero/issues/294

https://x.com/MoneroResearchL/status/2031788740411343031

51:04 Superchat 1 - Fluffypony and the FFS funds that are missing

57:57 Superchat 2 - ?????

Anti Moonboy News 62 - That Eerie Feeling

xenu@antimoonboy.com (xenu) — Sun, 15 Mar 2026 13:51:19 -0400

Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble | mp3

Timestamps:

0:00 Introduction

1:41 US Treasury report on crypto and illicit finance https://x.com/theragetech/status/2031024729608364089

10:18 The concept of digital cash is what is under attack

15:29 Bill introduced to protect crypto software developers from being prosecuted by Section 1960 https://x.com/EleanorTerrett/status/2027046039903977877

17:34 Roman Storm to be retried https://x.com/rstormsf/status/2031204201418883256

24:20 Motorola and Graphene announce partnership https://motorolanews.com/motorola-three-new-b2b-solutions-at-mwc-2026/

33:08 Robot/Bella skit 1

34:57 Fluffypony takes a leave of absence, controversy with the CCS, Fluffypony’s history with Monero

47:30 Proton Mail fail https://x.com/DoingFedTime/status/2030108076531995016

https://www.404media.co/proton-mail-helped-fbi-unmask-anonymous-stop-cop-city-protestor/

57:25 Robot/Bella skit 2

58:06 Zachxbt dud

https://x.com/zachxbt/status/2027016064534757659

1:00:42 Jane Street cope slop

https://x.com/1914ad/status/2026757796390449382

1:05:19 Probelab Network report on Malicious nodes

https://probelab.io/blog/peering-into-privacy-a-deep-dive-into-the-monero-network-topology/

https://x.com/MoneroResearchL/status/2031933664066498897

1:09:22 Cakewallet ux update and lightning network support added

1:11:38 Channel updates - Advertisements on Anti Moonboy News, Anti Moonboy News clips, other content

1:15:34 Superchat 1 - Monero.forum

1:17:30 Superchat 2 - Happy guy

1:18:32 Superchat 3 - Dystopia

1:19:55 Harden your OPSEC!!!!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gi6b5yndbB0

1:24:25 Iran, drones, that eerie feeling similar to February 2020.

1:35:00 Outro

Anti Moonboy News 61 - Monerotopia 2026

xenu@antimoonboy.com (xenu) — Sun, 15 Mar 2026 13:51:15 -0400

Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble | mp3

Timestamps:

0:00 Introduction

1:29 Monero Topia feature begins - Thank you to all my supporters, and thank you Doug and Sunita!

6:42 A mentally deranged Anti Moonboy fan tells me he likes to fall asleep listening to my podcast

11:26 The Spaniard attempts to be the greatest wingman of all time with a dastardly premeditated plan

16:15 Arriving to Mexico City

17:29 Alaskanon and the airbnb

21:23 Romantic fantasy about moving to South America

24:17 My presentation

31:15 Friday and Saturday things - Zano, Ricardo from Cake

44:54 A rumor spreads around Monerotopia that I was arrested [with bonus Robot gag]

48:49 ZachXBT clickbait tweet controversy

54:17 Reading a phenemonal article by Bloomberg about Monero darknet adoption. It sounds like it was written by a listener of Anti Moonboy News!! COMPLETE VINDICATION!

01:05:06 Thoughts on recent Hyperliquid Wagyu controversy

01:09:50 Superchats - slop, Olympics slop, USE LINUX, CZ comments on privacy

https://rumble.com/v6q317e-xenu-anti-moon-boy-episode-8-season-2-outlaw-crypto-podcast.html

https://x.com/zachxbt/status/2025917891678523644

Anti Moonboy News 60 - ¡Aguas!

xenu@antimoonboy.com (xenu) — Sat, 07 Feb 2026 22:00:46 -0500

Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble | mp3

Timestamps:

0:00 Introduction

2:08 Epstein is evil, but most of the crypto-related stuff from the Epstein emails is a nothing burger

9:25 Blockstream receives a donation from Epstein which will likely lead to Adam Back stepping down.

18:28 Coinbase received funding from Epstein

21:58 Amir Taaki contact with Epstein

24:11 Zcash cofounder meets with Epstein

25:05 Saylor meets friend of Epstein

26:18 Robot Gag (Bella arc part 2)

27:20 Saylor’s rough week

35:40 What are the top darknet markets using? (It’s Monero)

39:58 Monerotopia 2026

41:23 *ubic attacks XMR? No.

43:36 Superchat 1 - I hope this isn’t a 35 year old man

44:47 Superchat 2 - Based XMR P2Pool miner

45:55 Superchat 3 - Would Robot cheat on his girlfriend with a Dyson vacuum cleaner?

46:37 Superchat 4 - RIP Snex?!?

47:56 Superchat 5 - Zcash cofounder meeting with Epstein

49:12 Superchat 6 -xenu absolutely destroys idiot superchatter about how to correctly pronounce Monerotopia #historic

52:32 - Outro

Anti Moonboy News 59 - Introducing Bella

xenu@antimoonboy.com (xenu) — Mon, 26 Jan 2026 16:33:44 -0500

Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble | mp3

Timestamps:

0:00 Introduction

1:40 Monero View Key Controversy

10:32 Monero View Keys are already traceable with poisoned outputs.

19:05 xenu introduces Bella, his new female robot [pt.1 of Bella arc]

20:59 Thoughts on the Monero dump

27:52 Bitcoin tensions rising with regards to the number not going up

35:18 Peter Schiff namedrops Monero again

39:19 No news articles about social engineering hack

44:05 Monerotopia 2026 preview - Anti Moonboy Meetup?!?!?

50:10 Superchat 1 - Wownero removed from Cakewallet

54:43 Superchat 2 - Missing the Bitcoin gains but not missing Monero

58:10 Outro

Anti Moonboy News 58 - He Bought?

xenu@antimoonboy.com (xenu) — Sun, 18 Jan 2026 17:52:50 -0500

Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble | mp3

Timestamps:

0:00 Introduction

1:56 Monero price pump reportedly caused by a $283 Million social engineering attack https://x.com/zachxbt/status/2012212936735912351

7:50 Why only $283 million Monero could cause the price to rise so much

15:09 Is this social engineering hack a bad thing for Monero?

20:43 Taking a look at the similar hack from last year

22:17 Could this be a psyop?

25:55 They could “trace” their own movement of Monero for negative headlines towards Monero

28:51 It could be a way of testing out new chain analytic tracing tools being implemented on coinswap sites

30:36 A psyop to go after instant coinswap sites with regulations?

33:09 Cakewallet adds zcash

38:36 Senate Banking Committee’s Market Structure Draft https://www.therage.co/market-structure-surveillance/

46:24 Monero usage stats

https://x.com/shopinbit/status/2011785083464675670

https://x.com/PPQdotAI/status/2011037201191293396

https://x.com/mynymbox/status/2011781218082152942

48:52 Tether frozen in Venezuela

https://x.com/sethforprivacy/status/2011520757097251222

51:24 Download the latest ban list from the MRL!

https://monero.town/post/7271760

52:09 Monerokon 2026 is happening!!!!! LFG

https://x.com/OrangeFren/status/2011468048570445970

53:20 Superchat 1 - The conclusion of a THRILLING storyline (includes Robot gag)

55:50 Superchat 2 - The hack pump and dump is an endorsement of Monero

56:55 Superchat 3 - Friends suddenly like Monero

58:22 Outro

Anti Moonboy News 57 - Who is the biggest Moonboy of 2025?

xenu@antimoonboy.com (xenu) — Tue, 13 Jan 2026 21:26:24 -0500

Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble | mp3

Timestamps:

0:00 Introduction

1:35 Monero price discovery monologue

21:53 Grok AI porn scandal

30:08 Schizophrenic man murders mother after convinced by chat gpt that he was being watched https://x.com/vxunderground/status/2006164685440073816

33:26 Zcash Core team suddenly resigns, internal dilemna with Electric Coin Company

45:59 My podcast with Vlad was his 11th most downloaded of last year (despite being recorded in November)

47:51 The Moonboy of 2025

1:02:01 Cypherpunk of the year

1:03:39 Crypto publication of the year

01:04:29 Story of the year, and different things that happened in 2025

01:08:56 xenu receives a text from mother xenu after making a wholesome tweet about her

01:10:12 Superchat 1 - Gay person

01:11:34 Superchat 2 - monero.forum

01:12:42 Superchat 3 - mining pool

01:13:21 Superchat 4 StartOS and Linux

Superchat 5 P2Pool and solo mining

Anti Moonboy News 56 - Merry Christmas!

xenu@antimoonboy.com (xenu) — Mon, 29 Dec 2025 21:17:43 -0500

Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble | mp3

Timestamps:

0:00 Introduction

1:26 The Samourai Pardon did not happen…yet?

4:18 Thoughts on Keonne’s podcasts prior to incarceration, and the sad reality that several Bitcoin podcasters only care about this case because it involves Bitcoin

7:53 SDNY Senior Judge openly speaks negatively about cryptocurrency/Samourai Wallet https://x.com/L0laL33tz/status/1999467965834498109

10:02 Privacy is for criminals

11:47 Monerotopia 2026

15:02 Silver price increase

22:56 Saylor’s USD Reserve grows'

https://x.com/Strategy/status/2003088984814370922

27:00 Crypto market structure bill

27:40 UK labeling developers of end to end encryption as hostile actors

https://x.com/NoToDigitalID/status/2001315628737605958

29:21 Hyperwagyu

https://x.com/PerpetualCow/status/2001718984945602750

30:40 Retoswap on Android

https://x.com/RetoSwap/status/2001160365187420293

30:53 Monero Research Lab update: Concensus reached on FCMP++ Scaling reached! Also other stressnet news and Spy Nodes return.

https://x.com/MoneroResearchL/status/2001430161254764913

https://x.com/MoneroResearchL/status/2001413541794820407

https://x.com/MoneroResearchL/status/2001365463297855561

35:15 Massive Monero donations for Free Software Foundation

https://x.com/monero/status/2004278002876637414

36:04 Monologue: Improving Cryptocurrencies reputation as speculative hype by saying you USE cryptocurrency

47:10 Superchat 1 - Zookomaxing

49:48 Superchat 2 - Christmas Robot skit

52:04 Outro (excerpt taken from 88 by Actress)

54:25 Robot skit blooper

Anti Moonboy News 55 - SEC Roundtable

xenu@antimoonboy.com (xenu) — Tue, 16 Dec 2025 21:56:56 -0500

Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble | mp3

Timestamps:

0:00 Introduction

1:22 Trump says he will consider a pardon for Samourai Wallet devs

7:01 The actual privacy season

8:14 Why playing the game is worth it

9:54 My initial thoughts abouts the SEC Roundtable for Financial Surveillance and Privacy (LINK TO REPLAY OF ROUNDTABLE - https://x.com/i/broadcasts/1RDxlAqPkzDKL)

13:48 Opening remarks from SEC

19:55 The first “expert” ironically had her funds hacked last year

23:01 Zooko’s presentation

24:28 Aleo and the subtext of how the focus is on building American crypto companies

27:01 Predicate - Programmable Policy Enforcement

28:26 Spruce ID - Digital ID being used in California

30:42 Zooko responds to how Zcash deals with regulatory concerns

33:50 Panel 2 - A much better discussion ft JW Verret and Jay Stanley

35:15 Clip 1 Tornado Cash and the terrible track record of the Government lately regarding crypto

39:56 Clip 2 Digital ID rant

45:11 Clip 3 Tyranny of the smart contract

48:47 Clip 4 Price discrimination

50:23 Clip 5 Protecting developers

53:26 Superchat 1 - Watchman Privacy and Nostr

56:25 Superchat 2 - Favorite ways to onboard to XMR non KYC

Anti Moonboy News 54 - Vacuum Cleaner

xenu@antimoonboy.com (xenu) — Wed, 10 Dec 2025 19:47:42 -0500

Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble | mp3

Timestamps:

0:00 Introduction

1:25 Monero Block size sanity cap

8:31 MRL Chat logs

https://x.com/MoneroResearchL/status/1996620546746810432

15:58 Ofrnxmr tweet thread summary

https://x.com/ofrnxmr/status/1996365587262427348

20:39 This week’s MRL meeting shows an agreeable concensus for Tevador’s proposal.

22:13 Monero spy nodes disappear but it looks like they have come back

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k7LBKOn81rc

https://moneronet.info/

25:10 xenu’s neighbor Tony calls and and complains about Robot

28:10 Zcash’s bad week

29:38 Zcash Foundation trademarking cringe

38:08 Zcash Arkham block explroer

https://x.com/arkham/status/1998122638166634655

46:25 Do I hold XMR?

55:44 Superchat - Zooko SEC roundtable discussion

01:01:05 Superchat - Monero forum

Outro

Anti Moonboy News 53 - USD Reserve

xenu@antimoonboy.com (xenu) — Mon, 01 Dec 2025 20:37:43 -0500

Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble | mp3

Timestamps:

0:00 Introduction

1:30 FCMPs Disccusion starts - We need more senior developers, Perfect-Daemon CCS proposal passes! https://ccs.getmonero.org/proposals/anon-10302025.html

5:21 The biggest hang up with FCMPs is technical debt

8:48 Blocksize scaling debate

https://x.com/MoneroResearchL/status/1994276627077800059

15:40 Justin Ehrenhofer called out again for working for a blockchain surveillance company

18:21 CARROT

21:00 Bullet Star https://repo.getmonero.org/monero-project/ccs-proposals/-/merge_requests/626

22:42 FCMP Disccussion ends – When should we expect full chain membership proofs?

25:08 Strategy announces a USD reserve https://www.strategy.com/press/strategy-announces-establishment-of-1-44-billion-usd-reserve-and-updates-fy-2025-guidance_12-1-2025

30:45 An explanation as to why Strategy is a ponzi, and why the USD reserve supports this

36:26 Zec dumped lol

37:18 Monero’s performance and Darknet Market Maximalism

38:51 Talking about precious metals and why I like them

43:18 Nano Banana Pro - Latest AI image creation https://x.com/immasiddx/status/1992979078220263720

45:01 FBI Spied on Signal activist group counterfighting ICE

48:30 Europe moving forward with creation of age verification law to “protect kids” https://x.com/vxunderground/status/1994101689507320128

50:02 Superchat - Homosexual fan

51:32 Superchat - Opsec Guide

52:26 Superchat - Giving some relationship advice

53:43 Superchat - Curated content vs Giving everyone a stage

Anti Moonboy News 52 - The King is Back

xenu@antimoonboy.com (xenu) — Mon, 24 Nov 2025 23:12:26 -0500

Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble | mp3

Timestamps:

0:00 Introduction

1:42 Samourai Wallet Sentencing, and a rant about the lack of interest about this case from cryptocurrency and “privacy coin” enthusiasts

6:30 The Rage article on sentencing of Keonne Rodriguez

12:30 A catastrophic year in many ways for cryptocurrency privacy

16:50 Keonne Rodriguez recent interview: https://rumble.com/v71ytcc-he-built-a-privacy-app-now-hes-going-to-prison-keonne-rodriguez.html

18:00 If the “privacy coin” narrative was actually real, the Samourai Wallet story would be what everybody is talking about

20:08 Please sign the change.org petition for Samourai Wallet

https://www.change.org/p/stand-up-for-freedom-pardon-the-innocent-coders-jailed-for-building-privacy-tools

24:13 Robot Gag

26:19 Uncertainty in the Market

29:15 Monero performing strong despite the negative outlook, also making fun of the cringe shilling going on

38:00 Trust in Michael Saylor is at an all time low.

41:23 Bitmain federal investigation about possible Chinese covert attack

https://bitcoinmagazine.com/news/bitcoin-miner-bitmain-faces-federal-investigation-over-national-security-issues-report

48:43 World Liberty Financial token sales tied to North Korea and Russia

56:50 Prosecution wants to refile charges against Roman Storm

58:48 Superchat - Andrew Tate talking about zero knowledge proofs

01:01:40 Superchat - Tor vulnerability

01:03:06 Superchat - Veracrypt

01:04:38 Superchat - Runes

01:06:20 Talking about my love for the Spanish language

01:13:10 Meeting a Spaniard fan of Anti Moonboy in Barcelona

01:19:39 I will be releasing content in Spanish in the future

01:21:00 Cringe music nerd talk

01:31:13 Málaga

01:39:50 Rant about my Aunt and Uncle not being able to speak Spanish despite living in Spain for 11 years

01:47:11 Outro (Flying Lotus - Momma Dingo)

Anti Moonboy News 51 - Los Carteristas

xenu@antimoonboy.com (xenu) — Mon, 03 Nov 2025 21:56:36 -0500

Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble | mp3

Timestamps:

0:00 Introduction

2:21 Monero’s technical debt problem explained

10:11 Perfect Daemon CCS to work on optimizing daemon code

https://repo.getmonero.org/monero-project/ccs-proposals/-/merge_requests/621

12:36 In addition to improving underlying code, we can have a change to the scaling concensus

14:14 Justin Ehrenhofers scaling proposal controversy

https://www.naxo.com/who-we-are

21:01 Another way Qubic could attack the XMR network is with spam

21:53 Simplex Vouchers controversy and various tweets from Simplex Chat

34:30 Simplex says following the laws is a strength

36:29 XT Exchange delists XMR

37:05 Zcash flips Monero

39:27 Debunking the latest Zcash talking point that shielded z to shielded z transactions doesn’t matter because of Near Intents

44:01 Channel updates

46:49 Superchat 1 - Fellow anti moonboy

49:32 Superchat 2- i2p vs tor

51:50 Superchat 3 - Simplex again

53:41 Superchat 4 - Thoughts on Darkfi and Tari

56:17 Superchat 5 - Blawan and pick pockets

Anti Moonboy News 50 - Fifty Shades of Moonboy

xenu@antimoonboy.com (xenu) — Mon, 27 Oct 2025 18:28:02 -0400

Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble | mp3

It’s episode 50 of Anti Moonboy News! In this one, I talk about my marathon interview with Vlad, cover Tucker Carlson’s opinion on Bitcoin, and talk about my opinion on why AI will lead to digital ID.

0:00 Introduction

1:43 Thoughts on my appearance on BTC Takeover

12:00 The origins of Zcash being sketchy

16:13 The gaslighting from Zcash community about legitimate skepticism of Mossad/US Military investment in Zcash is BS

19:45 ANNOUNCEMENT: I WILL BE SPEAKING AT MONEROTOPIA 2026!!!!!

21:08 Tucker Carlson talks about Bitcoin

https://x.com/MJTruthUltra/status/1980852083726155906

29:60 Nick Fuentes mentions Monero

https://x.com/Ascenisonism/status/1981426859414893034

33:09 The Rage Article - Trump pardons CZ

https://www.therage.co/trump-pardon-binance/

38:08 Zashi Wallet vulnerability

https://x.com/zachxbt/status/1980612190609576229

42:22 Nano gpt transaction statistics

https://x.com/NanoGPTcom/status/1974791291767775347

43:34 Superchat - Mining Monero to acquire non KYC Monero

46:15 Superchat -Anti Moonboy PGP tutorial

48:32 Superchat - The future of total surveillance and my theory on AI Visual Terrorism and why it it will lead to digital id

Outro: Flying Lotus - SDS Instrumental

Anti Moonboy News 49 - One Year Anniversary of Anti Moonboy

xenu@antimoonboy.com (xenu) — Mon, 20 Oct 2025 16:35:21 -0400

Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble | mp3

Happy one year anniversary! Thank you to all my supporters. I love you all!

Timestamps:

0:00 Introduction [Flying Lotus - Robotussin (Instrumental)]

1:42 Superchat - Privacy coin bullrun?

3:33 Superchat - What mobile wallet do you use? Am I a crypto boomer?

5:40 Superchat - ARRR pumping, Overleveraged Markets, thoughts on technocracy and AI, brainrot culture vs ai brainrot culture of the future

14:25 Superchat - Shoutout to AlexAnarcho! https://alexanarcho.live/podcast/147

15:55 Superchat - Does 1 Eggnog equal 1 Eggnog?

17:25 Superchat - Doxxed Identity, making future episodes of Anti Moonboy News with AI prompts

21:12 Superchat - Mining in cold months

22:06 Channel Updates. Talking about my appearance on Joel Valenzuelas podcast, upcoming appearance on Vlad’s pod. Monero Culture. Thoughts on the Twitter drama noise.

32:11 One Year Anniversary celebration featuring Robot, Vacuum Cleaner, and Tony from New York.

34:44 The Rage Article on nonkyc being attacked with leaked new policy:

https://www.therage.co/democrats-market-structure-leaked/

Plus, If your project is not being actively attacked by the state, it’s probably not putting up a fight.

44:32 Thorchain Monero CCS created but probably will fail

47:54 Sounding off on Darkdotfail’s latest fail

Outro FLYamSAM - Don’t Like The Tree Screw - Instrumental

Anti Moonboy News 48 - Actions Not Words

xenu@antimoonboy.com (xenu) — Mon, 13 Oct 2025 11:02:57 -0400

Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble | mp3

Timestamps:

0:00 Introduction (Flying Lotus - Robotussin [instrumental])

1:35 Superchat - Edge wallet and thoughts on Mexico City

5:38 Superchat - BTC Pay Server Plugin Monero CCS

12:01 Channel Updates - Story about Spanish fan of Anti Moonboy

15:42 Odysee not integrating Monero

https://www.sambent.com/odysee-built-their-own-blockchain-but-cant-install-xmrchat/

20:24 Reading the article about Odysee and Monero

30:15 Actions speak louder than words, similarity to the Proton controversy

42:24 Privacy content creation plagiarism. Please unfollow @M_Solidus and support @WatchmanPrivacy and @realUrbanHacker

https://x.com/realUrbanHacker/status/1976938466639327741

46:52 Thoughts on Zcash’s continued pump

49:46 ChatGPT search history used to find Palisades arsonist

https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2025/oct/11/los-angeles-fire-suspect-pacific-palisades

56:16 Discord privacy leak update

https://x.com/vxunderground/status/1976417029289607223

59:09 Roger Ver freed

https://x.com/BTC_Archive/status/1976380371718553865

59:38 Monero news: My Monero to shut down, CCS proposal funded for ETH atomic swap development

https://x.com/MyMonero/status/1975258102770671680

https://ccs.getmonero.org/proposals/hbs-evm-atomic-swaps.html

01:01:50 Details on my Spain trip

https://mirafestival.com/

Outro (Flying Lotus - Grippit)

Anti Moonboy News 47 - Coltrane

xenu@antimoonboy.com (xenu) — Mon, 06 Oct 2025 18:18:58 -0400

Links: Youtube | Odysee| Rumble | mp3

Timestamps:

0:00 Introduction (Flying Lotus - Robotussin [instrumental])

1:47 Superchat - Music nerd talk about Flying Lotus and Alice Coltrane https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w0O9L7KXkC0 (Alice Coltrane - Journey in Satchinanda)

7:51 Channel Updates - Podcast RSS Feed is fixed!!! AIO cooler being fixed this week so retoswap video within the next two weeks, vacation in Spain in November

10:46 Why culture is so important for p2p cash, and how from the state’s perspective, all people using privacy are criminals

17:35 “Privacy Coin” is a meaningless term

21:09 Why Darknet Market Adoption matters

25:10 The catch is that DNM adoption leads to delistings

27:30 A tweet I made summarizing Zcash’s aversion to dnm adoption

32:30 Why being in it for the tech is inacurrate / @TheVladCostea tweet

https://xcancel.com/fluffypony/status/1974707619819397465

36:49 Is the Zcash pump organic?

39:40 Privacy coin pump article

44:28 Anti Moonboy News Debate ft Robot and Vacuum Cleaner

47:32 Roman Storm files motion for Acquittal on all accounts

https://www.therage.co/roman-storm-acquittal/

51:02 Chinese national convicted in UK, 61000 BTC seized

https://www.bbc.com/news/articles/cy0415kk3rzo

54:47 Monero FCMP Testnet is live

https://xcancel.com/monero/status/1974184698835611852

56:58 Discord breached

https://xcancel.com/vxunderground/status/1974448798110802167

https://xcancel.com/IntCyberDigest/status/1974253066904846531

1:00:39 Outro [Flying Lotus - CARPET CARPET CARPET]

Anti Moonboy News 46 - HUGE BREAKING MASSIVE NEWS

xenu@antimoonboy.com (xenu) — Mon, 29 Sep 2025 21:40:25 -0400

Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble | mp3

In this one, we talk about Dennis Porter, the nothing burger GOAT.

Timestamps:

0:00 Introduction (Flying Lotus - Robotussin [instrumental])

1:18 Cooking and stickers

6:19 Privacy Layer 2s on Ethereum

12:28 Was The Rage article overly sensationalist? And thoughts on the latest leaked dms controversy and where I stand on Bitcoin Core vs Knots

22:24 Channel Updates - Thank you for 1000 subs!

25:06 Robot has a HUGE BREAKING ANNOUNCEMENT

25:45 Who is Dennis Porter?

30:58 The nothing burger GOAT doesn’t miss!

34:50 The insufferable “Crypto Town Hall” https://x.com/Dennis_Porter_/status/1970181499699028000

38:47 Dennis Porter reveals his generational nothing burger

46:07 ROBOT MAKES HUGE ANNOUNCEMENT THAT WILL CAUSE A SEISMIC SHIFT FOR ANTI MOONBOY

The Rage article about leaked Lukedashjr dms https://www.therage.co/leaked-luke-dashjr-bitcoin-hardfork/

56:12 Monero Stuff - Rucknium article about 18 block reorg, Tevador new proposal for Share or Perish, Monerokon 26 not happening

https://rucknium.me/posts/monero-18-block-reorg/

https://github.com/monero-project/research-lab/issues/146

https://x.com/OrangeFren/status/1971170387087278567

Outro - Flying Lotus - Sleep Sweepers

Anti Moonboy 45 - Tradeogre is Ogre

xenu@antimoonboy.com (xenu) — Mon, 22 Sep 2025 17:38:45 -0400

Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble | mp3

In this one, I give a monologue on Tradeogre’s seizure by Canadian authorities, and what it means for the future of non-kyc exchanges.

Timestamps:

0:00 Introduction [Flying Lotus - Robotussin (instrumental)]

1:17 My RSS feed is broken, working on a fix

155 Superchat - Retoswap tutorial

5:36 Channel Updates - 1000 subs incoming, Attack of the Poisoned Outputs Season 2

9:22 Tradeogre gets shutdown

15:57 Tradeogre seizure press release and Western intelligence agencies collaborating with Canada https://rcmp.ca/en/news/2025/09/rcmp-executes-record-seizure-more-56-million-dollars-cryptocurrency

21:17 The blatant lie that they believe the majority of the funds seized were for criminal activity

26:10 The seized Tradeogre server will be used for blockchain analytics in conjunction with KYC metadata

31:32 Non KYC on the clearnet will soon be a thing of the past

34:00 Proving chain analytics is a crapshoot

36:37 Feds want everything to be tied to KYC exchanges

40:58 The Rage article https://www.therage.co/tradeogre-seized-canada/

43:39 To get funds back, it is highly likely Tradeogre users will have to dox themselves and itemize what they used cryptocurrency transactions for

46:06 My experience with tradeogre

49:24 Robot makes an ad for his doxxing website Robotmap [Flying Lotus - Juicy Revenge]

51:40 Tor/Feds drama https://x.com/vxunderground/status/1967983933951295923 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zp_qHcQQyz8

55:52 Scattered Spider doxxed after purchasing gift cards related to stolen Bitcoin https://x.com/vxunderground/status/1968783350518235338

59:52 Outro [FLYamSAM - Princess Toadstool]

Anti Moonboy 44 - 18 Block Reorg

xenu@antimoonboy.com (xenu) — Mon, 15 Sep 2025 19:56:11 -0400

Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble | mp3

Timestamps:

0:00 Introduction (Flying Lotus - Robo Tussin Instrumental)

1:20 Superchat - Zano and Edge Wallet https://libresolutions.network/articles/zano/

6:45 Superchat - Protestants vs Orthodox, interview with Matteo or Seth?

12:04 Channel updates

13:08 ***ic 18 block reorg

21:37 Monero Researchers/Devs are working hard to get DNS Checkpoints

28:18 New Patriot Act Legislation targeting digital cash https://www.therage.co/us-government-to-bring-patriot-act-to-digital-assets/

39:30 The “glass half full” crypto policy experts are all in denial

42:23 Kraken delisting Monero? https://x.com/tuxpizza/status/1965061656150700133

51:11 Charlie Kirk website doxxing leftists

54:45 Proton Mail complies to CERT https://x.com/vxunderground/status/1965684931503206427

57:50 Nepal Discord vote https://www.nytimes.com/2025/09/11/world/asia/nepal-protest-genz-discord.html

1:00:58 NPM Attack https://x.com/P3b7_/status/1965336272550899932

1:03:04 Shop in Bit stats August 2025 https://x.com/shopinbit/status/1966388809785815269

1:04:10 Microsoft Teams social engineering attack https://x.com/bax1337/status/1966539465620435073

1:06:47 Outro + robot gag (FLYamSAM - The Offbeat)

Anti Moonboy 43 - Filter Theater

xenu@antimoonboy.com (xenu) — Mon, 08 Sep 2025 20:13:31 -0400

Links: Youtube | Odysee|Rumble | mp3

Timestamps:

0:00 Introduction

1:09 Superchat - Intro music, Music, Consooming

6:06 Superchat - Dr. K POW proposal, are POS supporters compromised, future anti moonboy documentary, Tangem

13:07 Superchat - Eigen Wallet rebrand

16:51 Bitcoin Knots sucks because it filters out legitimate privacy implementations like Samourai Wallet

22:35 Bitcoin Knots nodes are theater that don’t actually do anything

26:26 The definition of what is illegal content can change at any time

30:47 Story about my dad dealing with chain analysis freezing his Bitcoin

38:31 find_and_save_rings() bug (update to 0.18.4.2!!!) https://www.getmonero.org/2025/08/26/post-mortem-of-find-and-save-rings-bug.html

42:36 Zano rich list posted https://brilliant-naiad-6afa93.netlify.app/

44:48 Pubic update

47:03 Outro music

MUSIC

Intro: Flying Lotus - Robotussin (instrumental)

Outro: Flying Lotus - Untitled 2 (Raw Cartoons)

Anti Moonboy 42 - State of the Monero Union

xenu@antimoonboy.com (xenu) — Mon, 01 Sep 2025 17:09:27 -0400

Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble | mp3

In today’s episode, we give a breakdown of the solutions being put forward to help fight against selfish mining, and I give the Monero moonboys some credit, while also giving them some blackpills.

Timestamps:

0:00 Introduction

1:58 Superchat: Zano influencers and github hosting

6:28 Superchat: How do I upload things on multiple platforms

8:05 Superchat: Podcast descriptions

12:03 Channel updates

16:00 9 block reorg summary

26:24 Monero Defense Fund

29:31 Hardening RandomX (detective mining, dns checkpointing, publish or perish)

37:22 Proof of Stake would cause a hard fork.

42:00 Will NGU save Monero? (my answer my shock you!)

45:41 The BLACKPILL for the Monero Moonboys

53:59 Suggestion for the Monero Moonboys

56:55 NEWS: DOJ Says they will stop prosecuting developers writing code, Saylor dilutes MSTR shares, Retoswap 10k.

https://github.com/monero-project/research-lab/issues/144

https://repo.getmonero.org/monero-project/ccs-proposals/-/merge_requests/604

https://www.therage.co/doj-prosecute-developers-writing-code/

https://x.com/Protos/status/1960075059185233980

Anti Moonboy 41 - Elixir of Anonymity

xenu@antimoonboy.com (xenu) — Mon, 25 Aug 2025 18:49:30 -0400

Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble | mp3

Timestamps:

0:00 Introduction

1:01 Superchat: Not being a sell out

4:45 Superchat: Buying PMs without KYC

7:40 Superchat: Saylor endorsing Monero

10:15 Superchat: Socialism

15:04 Superchat: Kraken deslits Monero in Canada

21:10 Superchat: AotPO return and i2p video

23:53 Channel Updates - New show music, upcoming vids

25:51 Breaking down how the Monero Defense Fund is going

29:10 Community Workgroup Meeting regarding Monero Defense Fund

34:47 Robot introduces his new girlfriend and she speaks live on the air!

37:02 Veridise fail

41:25 Captain Dero heist - https://x.com/Derolytics/status/1959312324667314624

43:50 BIS compliance - https://www.therage.co/bank-of-international-settlements-kyc-non-custodial-wallets/

47:14 Detective mining - https://github.com/monero-project/research-lab/issues/140

49:58 Why Monero has Aura https://x.com/tuxpizza/status/1958939508700795294

54:07 Q*bic gets two 9 block reorgs (breaking news)

Anti Moonboy News 40 - Well That Escalated Quickly

xenu@antimoonboy.com (xenu) — Mon, 18 Aug 2025 20:04:20 -0400

Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble | mp3

Timestamps:

1:45 Superchat - Canary in the Cage Podcast

2:45 Superchat - Other privacy coins?

7:19 Superchat - Lunduke article

12:25 Superchat - Crypto anarchism

18:43: Superchat - Reaction to 51% attack

23:37 Superchat - Tevedor proposal

27:02 Superchat - Is Q*bic a state sponsored attack?

31:04 Superchat - Time based methods to make selfish mining more difficult

32:52 Channel updates MATRIX ROOM antimoonboy.com/secretroom

37:00 Qubicmania

44:20 Hardening RandomX

Anti Moonboy News 39 - Split Decision

xenu@antimoonboy.com (xenu) — Mon, 11 Aug 2025 17:54:02 -0400

Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble | mp3

Timestamps:

Timestamps: 0:00 Introduction

1:14 Superchat - Big Donation

2:32 Superchat - Darknet Market Maximalism, The State, Vpns

11:22 Superchat - Miningrigrental and gupaxx

12:44 Superchat - Proving source of Monero funds when cashing out

16:39 Superchat - Compliment

17:18 Channel updates - Gupaxx video

19:24 Roman Storm verdict reaction

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zfKSKz3Kafk

https://www.therage.co/roman-storm-trial-split-verdict-tornado-cash/

36:16 Ethereum Developer detained in Turkey

37:38 How things stand after the latest marathon mining with Q*bic

43:00 This “attack” is only noticeable if you are on social media

50:11 Tradeogre is still down and the Monero price dump

53:29 Coincards security incident https://x.com/CoinCards/status/1953219196059566116

55:38 Fuentes name drops Monero, and how it has become a thing that, when an influencer wishes to present themselves as knowledgeable about privacy and financial transactions, they mention Monero. https://x.com/tuxpizza/status/1954224730606797146

Anti Moonboy News 38 - What's the Verdict?

xenu@antimoonboy.com (xenu) — Sun, 03 Aug 2025 17:15:52 -0400

Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble | mp3

Timestamps:

Anti Moonboy News is a weekly podcast covering the latest in peer-to-peer cash but without cringe speculation.

Timestamps: 0:00 Introduction

0:38 Superchat - The ramifications of a successful 51% attack

7:40 Thoughts on Q*bic’s failed attack

10:58 Superchat - KYC Monero - Coinswap

14:10 Superchat - You can donate Monero to me for the use of renting Monero rigs to fight Qubic. Listen for more details

16:12 Superchat - Donate to Gupaxx - xmrchat.com/gupaxx

17:05 Superchat - Friendly compliment

17:23 Channel updates - Matrix chat, Upcoming Vids, Merch

19:33 The Rage is the best crypto journalism for following Tornado Cash! Check them out at therage.co

21:05 Summary of the prosecution and how the defense responded this week

22:41 Two witnesses plead the fifth

25:31 Defense Witnesses

33:10 Closing statements

35:41 Waiting for the verdict

39:22 Samourai Wallet devs shockingly change to guilty plea, and I speculate why

https://x.com/zackbshapiro/status/1950573332451016856

https://x.com/amandatums/status/1950579119726444947

https://x.com/jchervinsky/status/1950580925709844632

47:31 Tradeogre is ogre?

48:54 Youtube to start requesting for identification and the slow creep towards digital IDs

https://blog.youtube/news-and-events/extending-our-built-in-protections-to-more-teens-on-youtube/

54:02 Saylor provides another concerning answer to why he won’t provide proof of reserves https://x.com/Pledditor/status/1951237681167430103

59:34 White House releases digital assets report and what it means for privacy

Anti Moonboy News 37 - Feedback Loop

xenu@antimoonboy.com (xenu) — Mon, 28 Jul 2025 17:51:31 -0400

Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble | mp3

0:00 Introduction

0:36 Superchat - Qtile and Notesnook

4:10 Superchat - Darkirc

7:04 Superchat - Why I don’t want to interview people on Anti Moonboy News

9:50 Superchat - A nice little message, forgetting again to tell people to subscribe and like my content

11:25 Channel updates

13:21 Tornado Cash coverage and why therage.co is the best cryptocurrency journalism and it is not even close

15:05 Potential mistrial? And FBI Agent Witness

19:27 Tornado cash was not receiving fees

20:59 Day two - Roman Storm had control over the website

24:00 Arguing that Tornado Cash should have used KYC…even though they aren’t supposed to

25:59 Mistrial struck down and prosecution presents flimsy chain analysis as evidence

29:39 KYC argument

32:09 Defense presents their first witness Preston Van Loon

34:26 ANTI MOONBOY NEWS TORNADO CASH EXCLUSIVE (robot gag)

35:34 Weekly News: Majestic Bank shuts down, Michael Saylor Strech, KYC Expansion

40:14 Q*bic - Introduction to what is happening

42:32 Monero’s miner decentralization has been bad for years

45:47 Calmly observing the situation and recognizing what you can do

49:15 The reason why miners are joining Q*bic’s pool and some good news

52:04 xenu makes a shocking pro-moonboy statement

52:34 Stop falling into the negative feedback loop. Instead, help create a positive feedback loop!

Anti Moonboy News 36 - Pig Butchering

xenu@antimoonboy.com (xenu) — Mon, 21 Jul 2025 19:45:44 -0400

Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble | mp3

0:00 Show Introduction

0:39 Superchat - What Tiling Window Manager do you use?

4:10 Superchat - Self censorship on youtube? DNA Conspiracy

9:36 Superchat - Midori and a math error

13:06 Channel Updates – PGP Video (with robot gag)

15:39 The importance of Tornado Cash

19:57 Go to https://therage.co for the best coverage of the Tornado Cash trial

20:37 Jury selection

21:48 Opening Statements

29:50 Katie Lynn - Pig Butchering. https://x.com/tayvano_/status/1946062225829175326

33:40 Other witnesses

36:00 FBI can’t math

37:39 Controversy over using Privacy as a defence

44:13 Anti Moonboy Merch

45:39 NEWS - Ashigaru update, FOIA Reveals the US Government is not holding as much Bitcoin as thought, US House passes several crypto bills

https://gist.github.com/84adam/3f38280ca2d0ca8362235f0afea2d153

https://bitcoinist.com/us-offloads-80-of-bitcoin-lummis-says-its-a-total-blunder/

https://www.thestreet.com/crypto/policy/house-passes-anti-cbdc-surveillance-state-act-blocks-digital-dollar-rollout

52:00 Thoughts on last Friday’s Monero vs Lightning Network debate

https://x.com/LayerTwoLabs/status/1946267387952533968

Anti Moonboy News 35 - Oh Captain, My Captain

xenu@antimoonboy.com (xenu) — Mon, 14 Jul 2025 18:56:03 -0400

Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble | mp3

Timestamps:

0:00 Introduction

0:35 Superchat 1 - Anti Moonboy Logo

3:52 Superchat 2 - Covid

6:51 superchat 3 - Pep talk for my fellow short kings.

9:08 Channel updates: I am creating an Anti Moonboy group chat on matrix

10:56 I am soon recording a beginner video about PGP encryption, as well as a video on Darkirc/Darkfi.

14:14 Monerokon Day 3 Recap - Juraj - Fellow Monerites, are we lost?

21:56 Robert Blinov - The Value of p2p networks

24:55 deki - How ayn rand’s ideas connect to privacy and crypto

27:21 Joseph the parrot - Beyond the FGC9

30:28 Sarang - Mnemonic Seeds for Risky Situations

33:42 Sockstrace - Jeremy Rand, Robert Mindo

38:20 Rucknium and Boog - Defeating Spy Nodes. moneronet.info

41:36 Martin Arness - Monero After DAC8

44:46 Luke Szarmowski - Cypherstack

47:42 Tornado Cash

48:28 NEWS

Potential Ashigaru vulnerability https://bc1984.com/ashigaru-terminal-whirlpool-review/

Dero deanonymization block explorer https://x.com/xenumonero/status/1944567837890171292

Unstoppable Wallet https://x.com/unstoppablebyhs/status/1942587979354235156

Eigenwallet https://eigenwallet.org/

Shop in Bit June stats https://x.com/shopinbit/status/1943195988212224275

Anti Moonboy News 34 - Kidney for Sale

xenu@antimoonboy.com (xenu) — Mon, 07 Jul 2025 20:17:25 -0400

Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble | mp3

Timestamps:

0:00 Introduction and Superchat 1: How do you onboard people to Monero?

6:40 Channel Updates – Two recorded interviews coming out this week, new video content coming soon https://libresolutions.network/videos/anti-moonboy/ https://alexanarcho.live/podcast/147

11:33 Monerokon Day 2. Dormouse presents his thoughts on today’s Cyberpunk Dystopia

17:54 Afungible - spam attack

23:09 Yu - Eclipse attack and Monero supernodes

28:08 ArticMine - FCMP++ FeesI

32:33 hbs - Ethereum Atomic Swaps

36:30 CJ and Sean Coughlin - Grease Payment Channel

39:00 Alex Szepieniec - Post Quantum Anonymity without signatures

41:38 Nym VPN

44:24 Robot gag

44:55 Tornado Cash Appeal

48:55 News: Abacus exit scams, Senator Lummis crypto $300 tax bill, Cakewallet adds native Tor, FCMP++ optimization, Basicswap update, Bitcoin Whale

Anti Moonboy 33 - SHUM

xenu@antimoonboy.com (xenu) — Mon, 30 Jun 2025 17:59:02 -0400

Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble | mp3

Timestamps and Links:

0:00 Introduction + Robot gag

1:17 Superchat - Compliment from https://kuno.anne.media/fundraiser/dves/

3:43 Monerokon Day 1

4:52 Anhdres

14:58 Sarang

20:30 Jeffro

23:24 Stringhandler

25:42 Justin Ehronhofer

28:19 Rucknium

News:

30:07 IntelBroker caught because of Bitcoin blockchain forensics

https://x.com/xenumonero/status/1938006551161409625

https://x.com/vxunderground/status/1938272227482350028

34:29 Ashigaru publishes zerolink whirlpool coordinator

https://k3tan.com/ashigaru-whirlpool/

https://x.com/noosphere888x2/status/1938708408473113068

39:33 Pewdiepie endorsing graphene whitepill

https://x.com/tuxpizza/status/1938346588071452834

44:18 Mortgages now looking at Fartcoin to assess credit worthiness https://x.com/Polymarket/status/1938015540905136205

45:28 Cartels hiring hackers

https://x.com/vxunderground/status/1939105579319882035

47:56 Nano GPT transaction stats

https://x.com/NanoGPTcom/status/1938326875643818219

48:46 $MON

https://x.com/cakewallet/status/1937635733424222669

52:36 Portonmail

https://x.com/tuxpizza/status/1939026348644933768

54:31 Aaron Day comments on Zano “nothing burger”

https://x.com/i/broadcasts/1BdxYqQRmpvxX

Anti Moonboy News 32 - Spy Nodes

xenu@antimoonboy.com (xenu) — Mon, 23 Jun 2025 17:22:14 -0400

Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble | mp3

Timestamps and Links:

0:00 Introduction and Robot gives investment advice

1:10 Superchat: Cats

3:04 Superchat: Boris

6:08 Superchat: Future beginner series on my channel

9:49 Monerokon 25 and my involvement with it

13:35 Contrasting the professionalism of Monero’s Research Lab facing spynodes vs the amateur reaction from the Zano developmental team

17:45 A broad overview of the Zano attack

21:55 In April, this researcher did a report on spy nodes attacking Monero

24:50 Simplied explanation of nodes

Nodes animated video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hM6TF3co7lI

26:50 Reading the Zaldo report (http://g7cpug4k6ydyq5dlxrji35xnfq5n5rba3n7holux4tmdsm42ju543tad.onion/)

33:39 Zano response

Chainalysis leaked video (go to 13:32): https://archive.org/details/chainalysis_xmr_202411

39:46 Calling out the Zano influencers for virtue signaling about privacy

42:26 News

Iranian exchange hacked https://www.bleepingcomputer.com/news/security/pro-israel-hackers-hit-irans-nobitex-exchange-burn-90m-in-crypto/

Coinmakretcap hacked https://x.com/CoinMarketCap/status/1936273633611334081

Graphene Update https://x.com/GrapheneOS/status/1936420921931084075

Passwords leaked? Not really https://x.com/vxunderground/status/1936050521762087254

Dero hacked https://x.com/Derolytics

Custodial lightning network wallet alby confiscating user funds https://x.com/TheDesertLynx/status/1934692956642119698/photo/1

Archetyp update https://x.com/DarkWebInformer/status/1936859332232319266

Genius Act – the only thing that actually passed. remember whne every three days people were wondering about a strategic reserve? Trump has a meeting later today! https://www.investopedia.com/senate-passes-crypto-friendly-genius-act-11757122

Anti Moonboy News 31 - Silver Bullet

xenu@antimoonboy.com (xenu) — Mon, 16 Jun 2025 18:37:27 -0400

Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble | .mp3

Timestamps:

0:00 Introduction

0:53 Superchat 1: Ross Ulbricht 2021 speech vs 2025 speech

4:35 Superchat 2: Audio quality

6:25 Superchat 3: Dealing with other influencers subtweeting about Darknet Market Maximalism and why darknet markets are the perfect adoption metric

10:32 What’s important to study is how the average person is using a privacy tool, because this captures the majority of adoption

15:45 Superchat 4: Attack of the poisoned outputs compliment and update on when that series is returning

19:03 Monerokon Discussion - Remember to use promo code ANTIMOONBOY20 for 20% off tickets!

https://shop.twed.org/twed/MK5/redeem?voucher=ANTIMOONBOY20

22:18 Channel Updates

27:04 FCMP Update

https://github.com/cypherstack/silver-bullet/blob/main/silverbullet.pdf

29:40 Qubic Mining breakdown

https://libera.monerologs.net/monero-research-lab/20250611

https://gist.github.com/Rucknium/0873b10b6d36ff6c9d6f8f54107d16f7

40:23 Archetyp Market Seized by Law Enforcemnet [Breaking News]

https://www.europol.europa.eu/media-press/newsroom/news/europe-wide-takedown-hits-longest-standing-dark-web-drug-market

https://x.com/DarkWebInformer/status/1934544152450277583

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ThbSLOVHKVE (attack of the poisoned outputs)

51:28 Graphene facing potential issues with Google Pixel

https://x.com/GrapheneOS/status/1932596516390072669

55:22 Xlibre

57.58 Monero news: shopinbit stats, open monero scam

https://x.com/shopinbit/status/1933073261694239085

https://x.com/MoneroReport/status/1933898715682443747

1:02:32 Saylor being an idiot

https://x.com/RhoRider/status/1932614610512712081

Anti Moonboy News 30 - Worth the Struggle

xenu@antimoonboy.com (xenu) — Mon, 09 Jun 2025 20:47:31 -0400

Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble | .mp3

Timestamps:

0:00 Introduction

1:20 Monerokon 20% off antimoonboy promo! The promo code is ANTIMOONBOY20. https://shop.twed.org/twed/MK5/redeem…

4:45 Games I played on vacation

6:54 Thoughts on podcast last week

7:47 I apologize for FCMP News clickbait and for not updating on Support XMR

11:24 FCMP Update and breakdown of what to expect

18:09 Thoughts on Ross Ulbrichts Bitcoin Conference Speech

28:18 Saylor pyramid scheme rabbit hole

40:48 Breaking down Qubic mining Monero

46:01 Monero BTC Pay Plugin CCS, Samourai Wallet motion to dismiss says that search and seizure of defendents gmail accounts was unlawful, Orangefren search stats and LN usage stats.

Anti Moonboy News 29 - Sand in the Gearbox

xenu@antimoonboy.com (xenu) — Mon, 02 Jun 2025 18:05:32 -0400

Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble | .mp3

Timestamps:

0:00 I am at the beach and Robot is here

1:30 Superchat 1 - DNM Maximalism thank you

3:10 Superchat 2 - Thoughts on extremists using Monero

6:56 Context for the Twitter drama

7:27 What actually started this is Moonboyism vs Antimoonboyism

12:45 XMR’s rise on darknet markets was caused by its culture of crypto-anarchism

14:50 Pressure release

16:16 Monero is politically neutral

18:33 Twitter only matters to pump and dumps

20:40 Mocking people for being “privacy nerds” is pathetic..

23:00 ..And so is putting down the Monero chads that got us here

24:47 Thoughts on Monero Devs leaving because of this (they aren’t)

28:48 Test run for a Saylor-esque Monero takeover

30:37 FCMPs hit a temporary roadblock due to issues with math behind scalability.

33:32 LNVPN posts stats

34:48 Samourai Wallet defense submits motion to dismiss

35:30 Bitcoin conference reports were positive

36:57 Saylor won’t show proof of holdings

43:33 Ross Ulbricht receives 300 BTC and wrench attacks being mainstream

Anti Moonboy News 28 - Check out Darknet Market Maximalism Today!

xenu@antimoonboy.com (xenu) — Mon, 26 May 2025 19:38:44 -0400

Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble | .mp3

Timestamps:

0:00 Introduction and Robot

1:20 Superchat - Renegade

3:02 Superchat - Anon Donation

3:33 Superchat - Rational Moonman

6:07 Superchat - Monero needs more cryptographers / researchers

9:22 Superchat - AlexAnarcho

10:55 Superchat - The Monero Moonboyism so far has been nothing

15:27 Thoughts on the release of DNM Maximalism

22:06 China Telegram market gets shutdown

32:03 Genius Act and Chain Analysis tool to track Stablecoins

38:11 Coinbase data breach happened in December 2024

39:05 Zachxbt gets trolled

39:56 Two wrench attacks

42:13 Bitcoin Conference

44:47 Monero News - Monero Hashrate all time high, Coindesk calls Monero “Controversial”

46:00 Bitcoin Pizza Day

Darknet Market Maximalism

xenu@antimoonboy.com (xenu) — Sat, 24 May 2025 06:49:51 -0400

Darknet Market Maximalism is finally here! The text and all media links can be found at https://antimoonboy.com/darknetmarketmaximalism

Anti Moonboy News 27 - Overseas Bribery

xenu@antimoonboy.com (xenu) — Mon, 19 May 2025 17:46:22 -0400

Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble

Timestamps:

0:00 Introduction

0:50 Superchat - Running a node

4:28 Superchat - DNM TShirt Giveaway and merch update

8:33 Rant about using XMR amounts instead of Fiat

10:18 Quick DNM update

11:15 Coinbase/KYC rant begins

12:00 Thoughts on KYC and how they cause wrench attacks, and chain analysis

19:04 KYC isn’t the end of the world but you must understand the consequences

21:30 Thoughts on Coinbase

24:28 Coinbase data breach

32:21 Paris wrench attack

33:27 How this Coinbase data breach can lead to wrench attacks

35:53 Court updates – Sterlingov appeals based on the DOJ Memo

37:33 Tornado Cash petitions for FinCEN communications with Prosecution

40:45 Samourai Wallet response regarding FinCEN

43:26 Steak and Shake adds Bitcoin as payment

45:50 Genius act revote

47:48 Monero news – Cakewallet phishing attack, Shopinbit stats, Monero hash rate all time high, Research paper on decentralized Monero exchanges

52:01 Why being in crypto for the tech is wrong

Anti Moonboy News 26 - Tshirts now avaiable at antimoonboy.com/merch

xenu@antimoonboy.com (xenu) — Mon, 12 May 2025 17:26:43 -0400

Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble

Timestamps: 0:00 Show Introduction

1:05 Superchat - Whatever happened to Dero?

3:31 Superchat - Agora and using XMR Chat

5:33 Superchat - Thoughts on Tari?

8:22 Superchat - Getting into Monero because of Breaking Monero

10:29 Superchat - Zoomers like my merch

12:06 Album art for Darknet Market Maximalism

15:00 Tracklisting and what to expect from the Manifesto

21:10 Tshirt merch now available to buy and free-shirt Twitter giveaway!

24:35 Samourai Wallet case still to continue

32:02 Monero pumps and my father is a moonboy

35:08 eXch server gets raided by feds in Germany, tinfoil conspiracy

41:04 Jack Maller lending scheme

41:55 Genius Act failed

43:43 Moonboy of the Year winner Dennis Porter comes out of hiding to talk about the strategic reserve bills that passed

47:15 $4million cryptocurrency kidnapping

50:18 Monero news: Random X all time high, support xmr steals tari, Retoswap on Android app, LNVPN adds Monero, monerowat.ch

55:10 Boomers talking crypto

Anti Moonboy News 25 - PUT DOWN THE CAT LUKE

xenu@antimoonboy.com (xenu) — Mon, 05 May 2025 08:20:14 -0400

Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble

Timestamps:

0:00 Introduction

1:36 Darknet Market Maximalism update and release date

4:25 Updates on the Bitcoin heist

8:13 The methods chain analysis is using to capture the criminals responsible for the heist

19:27 Incognito Market admin example

23:11 Monero’s performance following the heist

24:59 Monero moonboys coming out of the woodwork

29:18 Samourai Wallet case to be dropped? Probably not.

33:38 EU banning privacy coins in 2027

38:20 …but transparent chains may be noncompliant also?

40:31 Senator Lummis says Trump supports her strategic reserve bill

43:05 Arizona Bitcoin investment bill passes but gets vetoed by the Governor

45:47 Paris crypto kidnapping

47:45 Reto cannibalizing Bisq’s marketshare

49:58 Coincards monthly data

50:55 Breaking down the OP_RETURN shitshow

54:44 Examples of Knots/Ocean mining censoring Samourai Wallet

58:24 What would happen if there is another Bitcoin civil war

Anti Moonboy News 24 - Unstoppable slop

xenu@antimoonboy.com (xenu) — Mon, 28 Apr 2025 18:17:11 -0400

Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble

This week, we talk about the wild XMR price pump caused by a supposed BTC theft, Unstoppable Wallet’s awful methodology of winning over new users, and Samourai Wallet’s indictment anniversary.

Timestamps:

0:00: Introduction

0:37: Channel Updates

2:43: xenu gets a job

7:40: Unstoppable Wallet’s template for how not to promote yourself to privacy cryptocurrency advocates

16:55: Jack Maller launches Twenty One Capital

25:57: Terrible Coindesk article on darknet markets going back to BTC (lol)

32:22: One year anniversary of samourai wallet indictment

39:23: Massive Monero price pump caused by presumed theft of BTC

47:05: @alchemypay adds Monero

48:00: @mynymbox posts Monero stats

48:47: @doingfedtime launches darkwebdaily.live

49:57: Cryptocurrency kidnapping in Montreal

51:12: If you want your cryptocurrency to challenge Monero’s privacy, it will be delisted from most KYC exchanges

Anti Moonboy News 23 - Groveling

xenu@antimoonboy.com (xenu) — Mon, 21 Apr 2025 19:46:33 -0400

Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble

Timestamps:

0:00: Introduction

0:58: Superchat - Post Quantum Monero

7:25: Superchat - My robot responds to fan mail

10:31: Delaying Dark Net Maximalism until May

11:54: eXch shuts down fearing legal action

23:13: Pathetic groveling from Zcash

32:19: Tether transaction censored in Unstoppable wallet

33:32: Loony Lummis thinks the Bitcoin Market Cap will be $200 million

42:40: Taking a look at the Peraire-Bueno Case

48:01: Monero news - 11th bday, fcmps are coming, roasting whoever wrote the monero policy response to MICAR, shop and bit stats, Kagi accepts Monero.

54:08: Monero satellite node stupidity

Monerotalk 4/10/2025

xenu@antimoonboy.com (xenu) — Mon, 14 Apr 2025 18:17:53 -0400

Youtube | Rumble

Doug and I talk Monero, Darknet Market Maximalism, and moonboyism. Monerotalk was the podcast that helped educate me about Monero, so I was excited for this one. Enjoy!

Anti Moonboy News 22 - DOJ Shenanigans

xenu@antimoonboy.com (xenu) — Mon, 14 Apr 2025 18:14:34 -0400

Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble

This week, I break down the DOJ memo, talk about my recent interview with Doug Tuman, and go over the latest news about Monero.

Timestamps:

0:00 - Introduction and superchats. Monerochan question, Investing question

10:24: Channel updates: Thoughts on Monerotalk interview, upcoming tshirt giveaway

14:14: Department of Justice Memo - What does it mean for Samourai Wallet and Tornado Cash?

27:32: Tariff stuff

29:15: Binance dumps Firo

32:12: Lightning Network transactions hit new low

36:23: IRS broker rule is dead

37:34: Weekly Zcash drubbing

39:38: Monero news: @Cakewallet background sync, Changelly talks about Monero being untraceable, Haveno briefly overtakes Bisq in volume

49:44: Ross Ulbricht speaking at Bitcoin Conference as a free man

Anti Moonboy News 21 - Proton Fail

xenu@antimoonboy.com (xenu) — Mon, 07 Apr 2025 17:21:03 -0400

Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble

Timestamps:

0:00: Introduction and channel updates

2:00: Proton Mail Being Fools

13:27: Tariffs and decoupling

19:58: AI forging KYC docs and future nation-state digital identity

23:41: Zeus adds Cashu support

25:25: BTC hash rate all time high

26:23: Tornado Cash trial delayed and Chainalysis reputability questioned

30:17: Jack Dorsey comments on Bitcoin’s store of value

36:35: Monero News - Exodus wallet removes Monero, FCMP++ Optimization competition, OSPEAD getmonero blog, Caudena can’t trace Monero in Bybit hack, Retoswap, Coincards, Quickex, Unstoppable Wallet, CLI/GUI v 0.18.4

45:06: eXch being added to OFAC sanctions?

48:20: Bitcoin empty blocks

50:54: Zcash transactions at an all time low, Zcash added to Brave browser

55:36: Building privacy for people who don’t know better

Anti Moonboy News 20 - False Profits

xenu@antimoonboy.com (xenu) — Mon, 31 Mar 2025 20:33:54 -0400

Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble

Another week with more moonboy nonsense. You already know.

Timestamps:

0:00 – Intro

0:42 – A friendly gift

1:02 – Ring signatures and churning question

8:33 – Channel updates, Tshirt giveaway coming in a few weeks

12:30 – Chainalysis sued

19:48 – Saylor being a false prophet

24:26 – Senator Lummis says holding BTC for 20 years will cut the debt in half

29:03 – Stablecoins launching

34:12 – Bitmex pardon

35:40 – Tornado Cash update – DOJ pushes back

37:06 – AI Dangers and positives

40:18 – Boltz admits to censorship of Bitcoin used with OFAC in sscoinjoins

42:50 – Awesome FCMP++ update from Justin Berman and potential OSPEAD soft forks

45:14 – Fasting for Roger Ver

46:48 – Signal-gate

48:18 – Engagement farming and how Zcash can get street cred

Podcast RSS Feed now available

xenu@antimoonboy.com (xenu) — Wed, 26 Mar 2025 12:31:47 -0400

The RSS Feed for Anti Moonboy News is now available! Find it here.

I will be in the process of getting this on Spotify this week. There may be a delay on that with getting it approved…but in the meantime, you can get it directly from me with this RSS! To do so, input the RSS feed link on the RSS application of your choosing. The link is https://antimoonboy.com/podcast/dir2cast/dir2cast.php.

Anti Moonboy News 19 - Don't negotiate with terrorists

xenu@antimoonboy.com (xenu) — Mon, 24 Mar 2025 17:18:53 -0400

Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble

Tornado Cash is removed from OFAC sanctions, Saylor says complete nonsense, and ranting about how Zcash being friendly with KYC got them nowhere.

Timestamps:

0:00 – Introduciton

0:22 – Superchat – VR Meetup

1:34 – Superchat – Cash by mail opsec

3:50 – Way to many channel updates

8:49 – Tornado Cash delisted from OFAC sanctions

18:34 – Samourai Wallet trial update

19:25 – Trump speech at digital asset summit

27:28 – Saylor word salad

31:31 – SEC confirms miners don’t violate security laws

32:13 – Monero multisig proven secure

32:48 – Fair Act

34:06 – Rant about Joel the fraud

40:27 – Zcash getting delisted on Binance?

Anti Moonboy News 18 - Boating Accident

xenu@antimoonboy.com (xenu) — Mon, 17 Mar 2025 21:21:18 -0400

Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble

But officer, seriously, it was a boating acci-NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! Also talking about regulations and quantum recovery. Cheers.

Timestamps:

0:00 – Introduction

0:30 – Superchat 1 - Compliment

0:43 – Superchat 2 - Liquid Network and thoughts on second layer Bitcoin

8:21 – Superchat 3 – tfw I am an influencer now

11:25 – Superchat 4 – Operation Dark Gold

16:00 – Superchat 5 – xmr.bar

18:22 – Channel updates – Website, churning video, dnm maximalism draft should be done this week, podcast may become mp3 only once I transition to podcast services.

20:45 – The boating accident heard ‘round the world

30:19 – IRS broker rule turned down

34:00 – Fincen $200 threshold

35:49 – CFPB dismantling

40:23 – $0 wooden stick attack

42:00 – Lithanian national arrested for running exchange that laundered North Korean linked crypto 43:00 – Peter Schiff talks about XMR again

44:08 – MRL lab meeting about potential hard fork

45:00 – Cuprate

45:30 – Shop in Bit stats

46:25 – Quantum recovery vs Bitcoin

AotPO - Episode 30 -- The beginner guide to churning Monero

xenu@antimoonboy.com (xenu) — Sun, 16 Mar 2025 17:18:50 -0400

Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble

Churning Monero is often the advice given for situations where heightened opsec is needed, but why and how is churning used? In this video, we walk through an example and break down exactly how churning can help with the issues of poisoned outputs, and why confusing probabilities might make this a moot point anyways.

www.antimoonboy.com Superchats (will be read at the start of Anti Moonboy News each week): xmrchat.com/xenu XMR Donation Address: 84tVkJ6zAHyEpE8yBmkdVtY9s85DLmAwqX4uAdDsswHn4aRw7HpdEabfWigs8Y5QQRarqLj1TLZha38mjHTYJABUHEzgPTA

Anti Moonboy News 17 - Antimoonboy.com. The website is live!!!! Antimoonboy.com

xenu@antimoonboy.com (xenu) — Mon, 10 Mar 2025 21:03:47 -0400

Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble

Responding to Monero FUD, taking a look at cringey crypto commercials, laughing at the strategic reserve, and showing off my sexy new website. Enjoy the latest pod.

Timestamps:

0:00 – Superchats (1-4)

1:02 – 1. Shirt ad

1:53 – 2. Breakfast

3:48 – 3. Nardwuar

5:50 – 4. tl24

11:05 – Website walk through and channel updates

16:25 – Responding to Duke’s recommendations for Monero post-Ospead

27:00 – Analyzing the River Lightning Network Adoption report

36:20 – MRL debates hardforking for OSPEAD

39:18 – Blockchain forensics company looking for FCMP experts

40:55 – ‘Eclipse Attack’ against Monero’s network

42:01 – RPC node CVE

43:38 – Fixed Fload bends the knee and Thor Chain doesn’t

45:37 – Bad week for the strategic reserve

50:54 – IRS rescinding previous guidance

51:15 – NCA commercial rant

www.antimoonboy.com

Superchats (will be read at the start of Anti Moonboy News each week): xmrchat.com/xenu

XMR Donation Address: 84tVkJ6zAHyEpE8yBmkdVtY9s85DLmAwqX4uAdDsswHn4aRw7HpdEabfWigs8Y5QQRarqLj1TLZha38mjHTYJABUHEzgPTA

Where to follow: twitter.com/xenumonero

Anti Moonboy News 16 - The grift that keeps on giving

xenu@antimoonboy.com (xenu) — Tue, 04 Mar 2025 18:55:17 -0500

Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble

I listened to the first Senate Banking Committee on Digital Assets so you don’t have to! Spoiler alert: the government really likes stablecoins. We also spend some time paying tribute to Firefox, and I gamble away my life savings.

Timestamps:

0:00 – Superchats (1 - 7)

0:42 – 1. xmr.bar

3:21 – 2. friendly compliment

4:23 – 3. Odysee

6:17 – 4. is XMR infiltrated?

10:01 – 5. Do you have podcast downloads yes?

10:53 – 6. Nihilist opsec blog

12:26 – 7. ???????

13:13 – Channel updates – website, Paranoia Machinery interview, DNM Maximalism update, Podcast length

16:10 – Senate Banking Committee on Digital assets (1-5)

16:15 – 1. Introduction

23:23 – 2. Stablecoins can prevent illicit finance

26:50 – 3. KYC vs. Self Custody

32:02 – 4. We need KYC because of the Evil Russians

39:00 – 5. Dollar Dominance

40:35 – Strategic Reserve pump and dump

45:49 – SEC says meme coins aren’t securities, Democrats introduce MEME act to fight against meme coins, SEC drops Kraken Lawsuit

47:23 – Peter Schiff quote on strategic reserves

49:07 – Utah might pass crypto bill

50:25 – Chain analysis report on illicit finance admits they don’t include Monero in their analysis

51:55 – Retoswap record Monero sales, Cuprate node synched in two hours, mynymbox statistics shows Monero in top slot.

54:21 – LN usage report, Lifpay shuts down

55:12 – RIP Mozilla

Superchats (will be read at the start of Anti Moonboy News each week): xmrchat.com/xenu

XMR Donation Address: 84tVkJ6zAHyEpE8yBmkdVtY9s85DLmAwqX4uAdDsswHn4aRw7HpdEabfWigs8Y5QQRarqLj1TLZha38mjHTYJABUHEzgPTA

Where to follow: twitter.com/xenumonero

Outlaw Crypto Podcast 3/3/25

xenu@antimoonboy.com (xenu) — Mon, 03 Mar 2025 18:59:52 -0500

Website | Rumble

Nearly 2 and a half hours of based discussion. Paranoia Machinery and I expand on many of the issues with cryptocurrency today and I give a preview of what’s to come in Darknet Market Maximalism.

AotPO - Episode 29 -- OSPEAD Research and what it means for Monero (don't use KYC!)

xenu@antimoonboy.com (xenu) — Fri, 28 Feb 2025 18:24:08 -0500

Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble

How does OSPEAD impact Monero? Not much, but plausible deniability is a tricky subject. In this video, I give some advice on how you should use Monero in situations of heightened opsec and explain how the MAP Decoder attack can weaken Monero’s ring signatures.

Anti Moonboy News 15 - Currahee

xenu@antimoonboy.com (xenu) — Mon, 24 Feb 2025 18:37:23 -0500

Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble

In this episode, I rant about the lack of a response to OSPEAD, the absolutely useless @Monero twitter account, the Bybit hack, and I tell a story about old man xenu.

Timestamps:

0:00 – Superchat – XMR Signer

1:49 – Channel Updates

3:28 – My latest video on Tor Monero Nodes

5:50 – OSPEAD and a potential hard fork

10:00 – If you’re concerned about OSPEAD, don’t use KYC

11:08 – Rant about the @Monero account being useless

18:24 – Story about my dad being stubborn

22:13 – Zcash running out of funds

23:46 – Peter Schiff namedrops Monero

25:36 – Making fun of the BSR

28:26 – Lightning Network exploit

29:10 – Happy 7th b-day to Dread

29:46 – Ross Ulbricht throws support behind Roger Ver

30:24 – The Bybit hack is going to lead to regulations against non kyc swap services

Superchats (will be read at the start of Anti Moonboy News each week): xmrchat.com/xenu

XMR Donation Address: 84tVkJ6zAHyEpE8yBmkdVtY9s85DLmAwqX4uAdDsswHn4aRw7HpdEabfWigs8Y5QQRarqLj1TLZha38mjHTYJABUHEzgPTA

Where to follow: twitter.com/xenumonero

AotPO - Episode 28 - How to run an optimized Tor node on the Monero network (includes based config!)

xenu@antimoonboy.com (xenu) — Sat, 22 Feb 2025 18:33:51 -0500

Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble

In episode 28 I break down how to run an optimized Tor node for the Monero network. After watching this video, you will be confident in knowing you are helping the network in the best way possible and also sending Monero over the Tor network safely.

Superchats (will be read at the start of Anti Moonboy News each week): xmrchat.com/xenu

XMR Donation Address: 84tVkJ6zAHyEpE8yBmkdVtY9s85DLmAwqX4uAdDsswHn4aRw7HpdEabfWigs8Y5QQRarqLj1TLZha38mjHTYJABUHEzgPTA

Where to follow: twitter.com/xenumonero

Anti Moonboy News 14 - Elephant in the Room

xenu@antimoonboy.com (xenu) — Mon, 17 Feb 2025 18:24:08 -0500

Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble

Plan B comes out of the closet, Monero smashes it’s all time high, and Zcash sucks. All this and more on Anti Moonboy News.

Timestamps:

0:00 – Donations

1:15 – Talking about my upcoming project Dark Net Market Maximalism

5:16 – Channel Updates / Upcoming Website

7:21 – Jack Dorsey / Maller

11:25 – xenu explains why Zcash sucks

15:02 – Why the argument of “people have gotten caught using Monero so it doesn’t work” is stupid

16:17 – xenu gives his thoughts on LIBRA

16:29 – Cuprate

17:53 – rbrunner7 reddit post about CAROT

19:07 – XMR Hashrate ATH

19:28 – Shopinbit January statistics

20:35 – Chicago wrench attack and the importance of built in privacy 25:38 – Making fun of LN

27:57 – Ethereum chain analysis tool

29:48 – Congratulating PlanB for coming out of the closet

xenu@antimoonboy.com (xenu) — Mon, 01 Jan 0001 00:00:00 +0000

About

xenu is a long-time community member of the Monero project. Initially a lurker, he adopted the pseudonym while promoting the beloved grassroots Monerochan art project, which today serves as the unofficial brand mascot of Monero. In fact, much of the original content reposted on social media to this day was commissioned directly by xenu in the early days of the /XMR/ General. In April 2021, after being encouraged by a friend to join Twitter to combat Bitcoin maximalists, xenu slowly built a following of digital cash advocates due to his niche expertise on darknet market growth and the adoption of Monero. Realizing that he had more to offer than brief messages on Twitter, he launched the video content channel Anti Moonboy in October 2024, a brand focused on providing educational content about digital cash without any elements of price speculation. His first series, Attack of the Poisoned Outputs, is a comprehensive breakdown of how Monero works and how chain analysis companies can undermine it, covering relevant topics such as flooding attacks, timing analysis, and KYC metadata leakage. He later launched Anti Moonboy News, a weekly podcast featuring news and commentary about peer-to-peer cash and freedom technology. And, in the coming months, he will release Darknet Market Maximalism, a manifesto that summarizes the detrimental moonboy culture that has eroded the soul of cryptocurrency.

xenu@antimoonboy.com (xenu) — Mon, 01 Jan 0001 00:00:00 +0000

Anti Moonboy News

Anti Moonboy News is a weekly podcast covering the latest in digital cash and FOSS. Hosted by xenu, the show is released every Monday and, unlike many other podcasts about cryptocurrency, does not focus on price speculation. Instead, Anti Moonboy News is inspired by the growing frustration with how the monumental discovery of peer-to-peer cash has morphed into a casino of pump-and-dump tech stocks, without any of the idealism that brought us here in the first place. It is up to us to preserve and grow the cypherpunk counterculture and push back against the parasites who toss aside their rights for greed. Start your week off right with commentary on the recent happenings in freedom technology as well as xenu’s stories and rants about his life and a mixed bag of topics.

Every episode begins with a reading of superchats, which are found on my xmrchat page. If you would like to donate and participate on the program, send me some XMR with a question or a comment, and I’ll react to it. Thank you so much!

Episodes

RSS Feed

Spotify

Anti Moonboy News 63 - “Verification” - Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble | mp3

Anti Moonboy News 62 - “That Eerie Feeling” - Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble | mp3

Anti Moonboy News 61 - “Monerotopia 2026” - Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble | mp3

Anti Moonboy News 60 - “¡Aguas!” - Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble | mp3

Anti Moonboy News 59 - “Introducing Bella” - Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble | mp3

Anti Moonboy News 58 “He Bought?”

Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble | mp3

Anti Moonboy News 57 - “Who is the biggest Moonboy of 2025?”

Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble | mp3

Anti Moonboy News 56 - “Merry Christmas!” - Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble | mp3

Anti Moonboy News 55 - “SEC Roundtable” - Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble | mp3

Anti Moonboy News 54 - “Vacuum Cleaner” - Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble | mp3

Anti Moonboy News 53 - “USD Reseserve” - Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble | mp3

Anti Moonboy News 52 - “The King is Back” - Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble | mp3

Anti Moonboy News 51 - “Los Carteristas” - Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble | mp3

Anti Moonboy News 50 - “50 Shades of Moonboy - Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble | mp3

Anti Moonboy News 49 - “One Year Anniversary of Anti Mooboy” - Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble | mp3

Anti Moonboy News 48 - “Actions Not Words” - Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble | mp3

Anti Moonboy News 47 - “Coltrane” - Links: Youtube | Odysee| Rumble | mp3

Anti Moonboy News 46 - “HUGE BREAKING MASSIVE NEWS” - Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble | mp3

Anti Moonboy News 45 - “Tradeogre is Ogre” - Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble | mp3

Anti Moonboy News 44 - “18 Block Reorg” - Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble | mp3

Anti Moonboy News 43 - “Filter Theater” - Links: Youtube | Odysee|Rumble | mp3

Anti Moonboy News 42 - “State of the Monero Union” - Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble | mp3

Anti Moonboy News 41 - “Elixir of Anonymity” - Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble | mp3

Anti Moonboy News 40 - “Well That Escalate Quickly” - Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble | mp3

Anti Moonboy News 39 - “Split Decision” - Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble | mp3

Anti Moonboy News 38 - “What’s the Verdict?” - Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble | mp3

Anti Moonboy News 37 - “Feedback Loop” - Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble | mp3

Anti Moonboy News 36 - “Pig Butchering” - Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble | mp3

Anti Moonboy News 35 - “Oh Captain, My Captain” - Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble | mp3

Anti Moonboy News 34 - “Kidney For Sale” - Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble | mp3

Anti Moonboy News 33 - “SHUM” - Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble | mp3

Anti Moonboy News 32 - “Spy Nodes” - Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble | mp3

Anti Moonboy News 31 - “Silver Bullet” - Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble | .mp3

Anti Moonboy News 30 - “Worth the Struggle” - Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble | .mp3

Anti Moonboy News 29 - “Sand in the Gearbox” - Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble | .mp3

Anti Moonboy News 28 - “Check out Darknet Market Maximalism Today!” - Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble | .mp3

Anti Moonboy News 27 - “Overseas Bribery” - Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble

Anti Moonboy News 26 - “Tshirts now available at antimoonboy.com/merch - Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble

Anti Moonboy News 25 - “PUT DOWN THE CAT LUKE” - Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble

Anti Moonboy News 24 - “Unstoppable Swap” - Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble

Anti Moonboy News 23 - “Groveling” - Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble

Anti Moonboy News 22 - “DOJ Shenanigans” - Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble

Anti Moonboy News 21 - “Proton Fail” - Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble

Anti Moonboy News 20 - “False Profits” - Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble

Anti Moonboy News 19 - “Don’t negotiate with Terrorists” - Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble

Anti Moonboy News 18 - “Boating Accident” - Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble

Anti Moonboy News 17 - “Antimoonboy.com. The website is live!!!! Antimoonboy.com” - Links: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble

Anti Moonboy News 16 - “The grift that keeps on giving” Youtube | Odysee | Rumble

Anti Moonboy News 15 - “Currahee” Youtube | Odysee | Rumble

Anti Moonboy News 14 - “Elephant in the Room” Youtube | Odysee | Rumble

Anti Moonboy News 13 - “Pre Crime” Youtube | Odysee | Rumble

Anti Moonboy News 12 - “Ross Ulbricht is free!” Youtube | Odysee | Rumble

Anti Moonboy News 11 - “Who was the biggest Moonboy of 2024?” Youtube| Odysee | Rumble

Anti Moonboy News 10 - “Random X All Time High!” Youtube | Odysee | Rumble

Anti Moonboy News 9 - “How is Zano being used today?” Youtube | Odysee | Rumble

Anti Moonboy News 8 - “He fell for the El Salvador Meme: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble

Anti Moonboy News 7 - “Free Roger Ver” Youtube | Odysee | Rumble

Anti Moonboy News 6 - “Does 1 BTC equal 1 BTC” Youtube | Odysee | Rumble

Anti Moonboy News 5 - “I am thankful for Monerochan” Youtube | Odysee | Rumble

Anti Moonboy News 4 - “The Moonboys have unfortunately returned” Youtube | Odysee | Rumble

Anti Moonboy News 3 - “11/10/24” Youtube | Odysee | Rumble

Anti Moonboy News 2 - “11/2/24” Youtube | Odysee | Rumble

Anti Moonboy News 1 - “10/27/24: Youtube | Odysee | Rumble

xenu@antimoonboy.com (xenu) — Mon, 01 Jan 0001 00:00:00 +0000

Attack of the Poisoned Outputs

Attack of the Poisoned Outputs is an investigative series that examines how chain analysis can attack Monero. Among the many topics covered are co-spend heuristics, flooding attacks, timing analysis, metadata leakage, and nodes. If you’ve ever felt overwhelmed by Monero’s underlying technology, look no further! xenu, with some cameo appearances from his pal robot, will give you an all-encompassing background on the mechanics of Monero. The series was launched in November 2024 and is currently 29 episodes long. All episodes are available on Youtube, Odysee, and Rumble.

Episodes

Episode 30 - The beginner guide to churning Monero - Youtube | Odysee | Rumble

Episode 29 - OSPEAD Research and what it means for Monero (don’t use KYC!) - Youtube | Odysee | Rumble

Episode 28 - How to run an optimized Tor node on the Monero netowrk (includes based config!) - Youtube | Odysee | Rumble

Episode 27 - The Ultimate Guide to Monero Nodes Youtube | Odysee | Rumble

Episode 26 - Did Finnish Authorities Trace Monero Youtube | Odysee | Rumble

Episode 25 - What is OPSEC? Youtube | Odysee | Rumble

Episode 24 - Post-Quantum Monero Youtube | Odysee | Rumble

Episode 23 - Attempting to Trace the Funds of the Monero CCS Hack Youtube | Odysee | Rumble

Episode 22 - How the Sensationalist Media Attacks Monero (Japan Feds Tracking XMR Example) Youtube | Odysee | Rumble

Episode 21 - Breaking Down Wownero’s Severe Ring Signature Vulnerability Youtube | Odysee | Rumble

Episode 20 - How A Dark Net Market’s Monero Was Traced Using Timing Analysis Youtube | Odysee | Rumble

Episode 19 - A US Servicemember Gets Caught Trying to Sell Top Secret Files Youtube | Odysee | Rumble

Episode 18 - Wannacry Ransomware Monero Traced (Co-Spend and Coinswap Metadata example) Youtube | Odysee | Rumble

Episode 17 - The Problem with Accepting Other Cryptocurrencies, such as Bitcoin, with Monero Youtube | Odysee | Rumble

Episode 16 - Divorce Discovery News Article (Coinswap Example) Youtube | Odysee | Rumble

Episode 15 - Janus Attack Youtube | Odysee | Rumble

Episode 14 - How Chain Analysis Can Trace Monero Transactions with Coinswap Service Metadata Youtube | Odysee | Rumble

Episode 13 - Timing Analysis and 10 Block Decoy Selection Bug Youtube | Odysee | Rumble

Episode 12 - The definitive guide to buying Monero (November 2024) Youtube | Odysee | Rumble

Episode 11 - Full Chain Membership Proofs Youtube | Odysee | Rumble

Episode 10 - What caused the March flooding attack? Youtube | Odysee | Rumble

Episode 9 - Monero’s March 2024 Spam Attack Youtube | Odysee | Rumble

Episode 8 - P2Pool “Flooding” Example, and P2Pool Co-Spends Youtube | Odysee | Rumble

Episode 7 - An Introduction to Flooding Attacks Youtube | Odysee | Rumble

Episode 6 - EABE Attacks Youtube | Odysee | Rumble

Episode 5 - Using a Cospend attack to target an individual collecting donations Youtube | Odysee | Rumble

Episode 4 - Chain Reactions Youtube | Odysee | Rumble

Episode 3 - Co-Spends Youtube | Odysee | Odysee | Rumble

Episode 2 - How Ring Signatures work and what Poisoned Outputs look like Youtube | Odysee | Rumble

Episode 1 - Introduction Youtube | Odysee | Rumble

xenu@antimoonboy.com (xenu) — Mon, 01 Jan 0001 00:00:00 +0000

Contact

Email: xenu@antimoonboy.com

PGP: xenu.asc

PGP Fingerprint:

39532AB8933DB2315FD01FCE5C5095C4A06813BA

Twitter: @xenumonero

xenu@antimoonboy.com (xenu) — Mon, 01 Jan 0001 00:00:00 +0000

Listen: .mp3 | Youtube | Odysee | Rumble

Text: .html

Images: Front Cover | Back Cover

Spanish Translation

1. An Introduction to Darknet Market Maximalism

Somewhere along the way, it’s difficult to say when, the counterculture became subverted. What was once a scary, upending technological discovery has shape-shifted into a sensationalist gambling vehicle. Gadsden flags have been replaced by price charts, and the cypherpunks are drowned out by social media influencers. Many of the old-timers still cling to the belief that the complete erosion of Bitcoin’s aura hasn’t occurred, that the collaboration with traditional finance is actually a good thing, that applications for nation-state strategic reserves show maturation and legitimacy, and that escaping the so-called decrepit origins of the Silk Road means Bitcoin can finally become global money. But we all know that is a farce, because what was once branded as a peer-to-peer electronic cash system has now become nothing more than a glorified tech stock.

And that is why I propose darknet market maximalism.

Now let me be clear: this is not an endorsement of illicit activity, nor is it encouragement to commit crime. Rather, it’s an acknowledgement that the largest group of people who depend on peer-to-peer cryptocurrency are the individuals participating in internet black markets, and that by extension, if we imagine a situation that calls for a private and battletested form of digital currency, it would logically follow what is being adopted in underground drug economies. Consider: what type of person uses cryptocurrency as a utility and not as a savings account? Who stresses out knowing that they don’t have access to cryptocurrency? Who takes cryptocurrency seriously, as a matter of freedom or incarceration, and not as some silly meme? The answer happens to be the individuals that make up these dark net marketplaces, because if cryptocurrency were to magically disappear, the underground internet economy would collapse overnight. Uncensorable digital cash has made it so the average Joe can do things that are not approved by governments, and this has tremendous worldwide implications, such as the successful deterrent of things like price discrimination, data mining, or targeted advertising. It is likewise now possible to donate to political movements around the world in a safe and anonymous manner, and to do so with an encrypted net worth, the proof of which is only made visible by your secret key and your conscious decision of whether or not you want to disclose such information. Despite the complete takeover of every mainstream financial instrument or medium, the state has little control over peer-to-peer cash node networks hosted by passionate volunteers around the world, and this isn’t the result of billions of dollars of investment by nation states, but by the determination of crypto anarchists embedded in open-source communities. In fact, Bitcoin was created one fateful day by one of these anonymous enthusiasts who happened to be lurking a cypherpunk mailing list. It is arguably the greatest open-source achievement in history, and we are still coming to terms with it.

I understand that the dark web has notoriety and stigma, but this is real-world usage. This is adoption based entirely on peer-to-peer cash. It’s a measuring stick that we can point to and say is happening. It isn’t some speculative pipe dream, the kind that fills those dreadful cryptocurrency podcasts that clamor for a world run by the blockchain. It’s reality, and the ones who are avoiding having this conversation about it are not worth the time of day. Some may protest and say that this association is detrimental, but these individuals do not understand the game that is being played: because from the perspective of the state, a law-abiding citizen who advocates for privacy is seen as dangerous as the junkie who is trying to score his next fix. So while the polarizing brand of a ‘darknet market maximalist’ may make some squeamish, it is nothing more than a reflection of how they view you.

I must confide to the dear reader that the term darknet market maximalism is a tongue-in-cheek troll. I am fully aware that the outsider will read the title of this manifesto and immediately jump to the erroneous conclusion that we are all hell-bent on overthrowing the government, that we are all criminals, or perhaps even cyber terrorists. But this writing is not for them. We are cypherpunks who advocate for free and open-source software, and we understand the long battle that lies ahead. They already brand us as the bad guys with something to hide, and for that reason we playfully acknowledge this, we lean into it, and we frame the conversation as to why free and open-source software would even have this stigma to begin with. Plus, there are so many different types of “maximalists” these days that it’s easy to lose track. For example, I can just as easily refer to myself as a digital cash maximalist or a privacy maximalist. But in this age where attention is hard to grab, sometimes something that is shocking, especially something with reason behind it, is important to get people to take notice. Because similarly, the explosion of darknet markets in the early 2010s caused an enormous amount of interest in Bitcoin. And so by bringing darknet market usage into focus, we add an edge to cryptocurrency that has been forgotten but is wholly necessary for the long term proliferation of parallel economies that threaten the status quo of fiat currency.

Before I finish this introduction, I would like to take a second to acknowledge the ones today who do use cryptocurrency, who do promote parallel economies, and who willfully push for adoption. Even though I may have differing opinions on certain things, I truly am appreciative that there are those that still carry the torch. Because it is not true, in any sense of the claim, that cryptocurrency is only for illicit use. But unfortunately, we are outnumbered, quite tremendously, I might add. The overwhelming majority of cryptocurrency use today has become speculative gambling, and it is only going to get worse unless we push back. The silly paradox is that after rebranding cryptocurrency into a friendly ecosystem that isn’t just for criminals, we’ve lost the world-changing intensity that made peer-to-peer cash so powerful in the first place. And because of that, we must turn things back to their roots, and become darknet market maximalists.

2. On Moonboyism

Before we can understand why the darknet market maximalist is enlightened, we must examine the root of all of cryptocurrency’s problems—the moonboy. Contrary to what you may think, the problems facing cryptocurrency are not, for example, regulatory battles with the state, technological limitations of the blockchain, or the need for improving public opinion on cryptocurrency. These three issues, among others, are only problematic from the perspective of the moonboy. But from the perspective of the darknet market maximalist, the real issue is the unavoidable human condition of greed, and there is no better example of that than the loud and pathetic underclass of moonboys, whose participation in cryptocurrency amounts to feverish speculation and chart-watching. The dire situation that peer-to-peer cash finds itself in is the direct result of this ongoing 51% attack of public opinion by the moonboy, who has done everything to erode the soul of cryptocurrency over the past decade.

The moonboy is a cypherpunk in name only, advertising their love for Satoshi in vain attempts to appear cultured. They are fraudulent, arrogant, tribalistic, and gullible. Many of them spend no time learning about free and open-source software, choosing instead to indulge in proprietary slop, their sole contributions to the ecosystem being their retweets of GIFs of roller coasters during the unpredictable market cycles of cryptocurrency. They are complacent and believe politicians with photoshops of laser eyes care about them. But here is the worst part of it—because of their insatiable greed, they become overleveraged in hopes of great material gain. And this debt causes the moonboy to become easily manipulated, leading them to make decisions against the idealism that cryptocurrency was created to benefit.

Our distaste for moonboyism is not a disapproval of investment. There is a clear and rational investment strategy with many cryptocurrency assets due to the property of scarcity. There are investors, for example, who encourage holding cold storage who are good people and valuable contributors to the community. The moonboy, however, is the vocal majority of cryptocurrency holders today, drawn by the volatile free market, which encourages the potentially “face-melting gains” that could let them become the next Silicon Valley entrepreneur. Even worse, while having this degenerate, gambling attitude, they believe they are acting from a position of virtue due to their endorsement of Satoshi and the now watered-down worldview that the early cypherpunks pushed for. The moonboy is a hypocrite to their core, co-opting the term Bitcoiner to now mean pro-censorship and pro-state, so long as it guarantees the safety of their returns.

Let’s circle back and review the three aforementioned “problems” facing cryptocurrency and demonstrate how the viewpoints of the moonboy and the darknet market maximalist differ:

Problem One: Government regulations create uncertainty about cryptocurrency.

The moonboy – “If the government passes certain legislation, it would lead to my cryptocurrency being valued more/less. If a compromise can be reached, we are moving in the right direction.”

The darknet market maximalist – “We are concerned with preserving civil liberties and will fight tooth and nail to defend them. There will be no compromises.”

Problem Two: Technological limitations of the blockchain prevent widespread adoption.

The moonboy – “We must do everything we can to become a global currency, even if it means endorsing proprietary software, because more people means my bags will be worth more.”

The darknet market maximalist – “It is fundamentally true that the blockchain is not great for worldwide adoption without centralization. Therefore, we will continue to organically grow and improve without bending the knee to these centralized solutions out of concern for our liberty.”

Problem Three: Public opinion on cryptocurrency is negative due to a lack of trust fueled by volatility and scams.

The moonboy – “We must continue promoting cryptocurrency to build trust so long term we get more people to buy, because my cryptocurrency will be worth more and they too can become rich.”

The darknet market maximalist – “Building parallel economies is the goal. If people aren’t interested in peer-to-peer cryptocurrency, that’s okay, but we should explain the benefits of peer-to-peer cash and lead by example.”

We could go on, but the point should be clear: on the one hand you have a lifestyle of greed cosplaying as idealism, and on the other a grounded examination of the free market driven by idealism. In other words, the darknet market maximalist recognizes that the pursuit of Satoshi’s dream of peer-to-peer cash has made them a target of the state and that the mob that drives the narrative of public opinion is following the invisible hand of greed. These two groups cannot coexist with each other and, due to the populist standing held by the moonboys, the darknet market maximalist is driven out of discussion by means of censorship.

Perhaps the best way of summarizing the differences between these two groups is the darknet itself. How do the two groups view peer-to-peer cash being used on darknet markets for illicit purposes?

The moonboy – “The darknet represents a time in the early days of cryptocurrency. We’ve grown past that. Yes, criminals use cryptocurrency on darknet markets, but there is so much more value that cryptocurrency can bring. The association is toxic.”

The darknet market maximalist – “The darknet is the oldest and largest peer-to-peer market dependent on cryptocurrency, and observations of cryptocurrency usage in these battle-tested markets reveal what projects are considered the most powerful to study, because as computer usage continues to become further centralized and proprietary, the freedom of open-source peer-to-peer projects, such as digital cash, must be preserved.”

The moonboy is not necessarily wrong, as there are many different use cases for cryptocurrency that go beyond buying drugs on the internet. However, the moonboy fails to understand the powerful implications of peer-to-peer cash and the lengthy war of privacy rights that awaits us ahead. Why is this the case? It is because the moonboy will not fight the state, so this is not a concern to them. To the moonboy, the preservation of liberties plays second fiddle to the growth of their investment, so any association with illicit activities is heresy. There is no reason for them to vocalize anything against the state, and when regulations come crashing down they will go in line with what they are told.

But the cypherpunk, who is aligned with the darknet market maximalist, embraces the legal battle and openly talks about the documented illicit use of cryptocurrency. Why, you may ask? Because they are aware of the game being played. By adhering to darknet markets, they frame the conversation on their terms, because they understand that the state views our push for liberty as an annoyance that must be crushed. The darknet market maximalist understands that it is the goal of the state to promote the growth of moonboyism and to censor the dissidents and that playing nice is not worth it. So let’s draw a line in the sand: if usage of peer-to-peer cash by association makes me a criminal, then I am a criminal. The darknet market maximalist cosigns that statement, viewing the free market in a cold and impartial manner, and the moonboy recoils in horror, equating that sort of idealism to an unnecessary confrontation that is contrary to why they ever bought cryptocurrency in the first place.

3. Michael Saylor, the Pied Piper

We have now defined moonboyism as a speculative mob that has distanced itself from the tenets of libertarianism. But how are they controlled? The moonboy, like moths to the flame, seeks out a leader who tells them that their greed is noble, and what better representative of this phenomenon than Michael Saylor, the pied piper of the moonboys? Within only several years, Saylor has hijacked Bitcoin to the point where he has become the defacto leader despite his vocal distancing from the libertarian philosophy cryptocurrency was built on. In an interview last year, Saylor declared his belief as to how Bitcoin’s medium of exchange is a dated concept and how Bitcoin custody should be left to the control of centralized exchanges, the same entities known for data collection and fractional reserve lending. These shocking statements received several days of pushback on Twitter, with many cryptocurrency influencers crafting carefully worded tweets admonishing this rhetoric. The result? Saylor posted a brief apology statement, and all was forgiven. How sweet it is to be king! The pied piper has enticed the moonboys with dreams of economic prosperity, and idealism be damned because now he has majority rule.

On Saylor’s Twitter page, he has a pinned tweet of his atrocious poetry—the one that talks about cyber hornets—and you just know he looks at that all the time like it’s something to be proud of. He likewise often waxes poetic about Bitcoin being “digital energy” on stage in front of crowds of thousands of people, spewing clumsy metaphors in attempts at romanticizing Bitcoin as a sort of religion. However, Saylor’s influence expands beyond the lowly moonboy serfs, reaching all the way to the regional dukes and duchesses who carry relative influence in this economy of delusion. This is routinely brought to light in the yearly Bitcoin conferences but recently made all the more embarrassing at Saylor’s “100k New Year’s Party.” The event, held at Saylor’s mansion, amounted to a pathetic role-play of The Great Gatsby, with Saylor giddily giving the affluent guests a tour of the estate filled with his luxuries. To the moonboy, a golden ticket to this party would be “making it.” They aspire to be recognized as an astute investor who is wiser than all the other fools. But for the darknet market maximalist, this is but a summary of how rotten things have gotten, a portrait of the desperate fantasy played out in the minds of the moonboys that one day they too will be in Saylor’s position, with thousands of underlings jealous of the success of their big-brained investing.

Saylor’s contributions to Bitcoin have been doubling and tripling down on the wretched mentality of “HODL” culture, which espouses that the only use case of Bitcoin is one of buying and holding on for dear life. The only thing that matters to Saylor is for his followers to accumulate Bitcoin and to sell their kidneys if they are lacking liquidity. This creates an interesting paradox: how can Bitcoin be the future of money if nobody wants to actually use it? The advocates of the store of value use case point to Gresham’s law, arguing that the hardest form of money will be removed from circulation. This would be fine if Bitcoin had characteristics of fungibility (it doesn’t), or if its security model wasn’t based on transaction fees (it is), or if there wasn’t a concerted effort to centralize the software that is used by Bitcoiners. The results of the Saylor mindset have been hoarding, empty blocks, endorsement of proprietary solutions, and the crucial reliance on the value of Bitcoin going up. One can hope that eventually the cult of personality surrounding Saylor will get its comeuppance, but even if the house of cards were to fall, behind Saylor is an entire cohort ready to take his place, and inevitably the moonboys will elect their next leader because it is against their nature to ever think for themselves.

Cryptocurrency is dominated by moonboys, and the pied pier Saylor is a reflection of that. Considering how Saylor hasn’t been tarred and feathered by the Bitcoin community but rather exalted and embraced is all you need to know about the current state of affairs. It’s a wonder why this fraud, with his billions of dollars, never thought to solidify the defense of Samourai Wallet or Tornado Cash with the best legal team money can buy. Why isn’t he likewise helping spearhead a lobbying campaign on Capitol Hill for privacy and freedom for those who use cryptocurrency as digital cash? Why does he only ever talk about buying Bitcoin and not being a reasonable individual who can occasionally take profits or use Bitcoin? You know the answer. It’s because he doesn’t care about Bitcoin, or freedom, or any of those things. The Saylor swindle is a game of musical chairs where the only winners playing are the ones lucky enough to get out while they are ahead. We are in the middle of the game now, which of course, is rigged for him to come in first place.

I imagine there are readers who find my tone to be elitist, and I don’t disagree. Cryptocurrency as a whole is in need of criticism and introspection, especially from those who are staunch advocates of digital cash. How tiresome it is, watching the community from the sidelines, with so-called journalists and podcasters jockeying for relevance by shilling whatever cryptocurrency scam gives them attention or money. It’s even worse to see the public blindly follow the pied piper Saylor, whose enchanting song plays into the hopes and dreams of the desperate moonboy who has seemingly nothing else to look forward to in their lives. But don’t confuse pretentious viewpoints with an unwillingness to help! If you happen to be suffering from a bout of moonboyism, yet you still have a shred of dignity, you will gradually become inspired to learn and improve, and along the way the privacy experts will be happy to point you in the right direction. There have never been more resources to learn about privacy and how you can protect yourself, and it goes without saying that one of the greatest investments you can make towards your future is in your education of how to fight back against the surveillance state. Take it one step at a time, harden every facet of your opsec, and learn the enemy inside and out. And as time passes, you will stand alongside the other jaded cypherpunks who have become darknet market maximalists, scratching their heads in bewilderment while Saylor makes a fool of himself yet again before his mob of supporters.

4. The Global Adoption Grift

What Saylor and company do to seduce the moonboy is to play up their fantasy, which is a hypothetical world dependent on the scarce asset of Bitcoin, with claims that the moonboy will be seated in the citadel, shielded from the unworthy nocoiners who must grovel at their feet for some spare sats to be thrown in their direction. This leads us to what is perhaps the biggest lie peddled by cryptocurrency influencers—global adoption. For many, this leap of faith is taken for granted. It’s inevitable, surely, that fiat currency will fail, that dollars will become useless, that all trust will be lost, and wheelbarrows of cash will be needed to buy loaves of bread. It surely must happen that, one day, people will unanimously embrace cryptocurrency as their source of savings and income. That the parasitic elites who have controlled our economies for hundreds of years will concede their political clout for the greater good. That the entire might of all nation-states will crumble under the power of Bitcoin, and they will bend the knee and declare that Satoshi is King, and that we will all hold hands and sing Kumbaya in a new era of peace.

If you believe this, you are probably in an echo chamber.

As we have already seen, every aspect of peer-to-peer digital cash that makes it an assault on the strength of the nation-state has been attacked, neutered, and infiltrated. Fiat currency is not going to go away quietly, and the general public goes along and will continue to go along with what the government tells them to do because it is safe, and people like to feel safe. And so, the state-endorsed narrative regarding Bitcoin is that it is a digital asset, not a form of peer-to-peer cash. The spotlight is shown on Michael Saylor and Senator Lummis, who give pathetic stump speeches on CNBC with their interest firmly set on future collaboration with the traditional financial system. The moonboy mob goes along with the circus because the number continues to go upwards, and all the while the media implies that the usecase of a medium of exchange is a relic of the clumsy cypherpunk origins. Any hint of the counter culture that is an affront to banking is downplayed and smeared as crimes against anti-money-laundering legislation. In a word, their idealized future of peer-to-peer cash is an alternate form of Venmo—censorable, controllable, compliant.

Whether or not worldwide adoption of cryptocurrency is hypothetically possible or probable is not the point. What has to be understood is that at the time of this writing, global adoption is a Trojan horse for centralization and spying, and anyone advocating for it is ironically arguing for the expansion of the traditional financial system. How do we know this? Because the solutions the cryptocurrency talking heads propose are not used on darknet markets. As a darknet market maximalist, we use this simple barometer to remove the unnecessary technical discussion and the seemingly endless amount of cryptocurrency protocols that confuse and overwhelm the newcomer and, instead, highlight the fact that darknet markets represent the counterculture within cryptocurrency that still pushes against traditional finance. And wouldn’t you know it, the people who depend on battle-tested peer-to-peer cash are not using second-layer Bitcoin applications. In fact, they would accuse you of being a law enforcement operative for even suggesting it.

To be clear, adoption of peer-to-peer cash among the general public is extremely difficult, and attempts made at bridging the gap between the thirty-year-old Linux user and the 70-year-old grandmother are impressive. But with this level of user-friendly experience comes the unavoidable whitewashing of free and open-source software principles, and worse, a neglect towards the politically driven crypto-anarchism that gives peer-to-peer cash its vitality. The darknet market maximalist argues for realism and baby steps towards greater adoption instead of daydreaming of the future. This is boring, and gradual, but it is rational and grounded. Rather than being distracted by monthly increases or decreases in a cryptocurrency’s value, we must highlight the importance of expanding parallel economies for that cryptocurrency. Rather than panicking over the latest government regulation, we must double down on our beliefs and fight back both in the courts and through our peer-to-peer utilization. Rather than seeking to win people over with promises of sports cars, we must gather as many allies of privacy advocacy as possible so long as they share our perspective of the importance of free open-source software. The focus must be on laying a foundation that future generations can build on brick-by-brick, and while there may be some profit and an increase of public interest along the way, that must never get in the way of idealism.

Removing oneself from the idea of global adoption is the most important step to take for the moonboy in recovery. It shows a maturation in their world view, a growth of discipline, and an understanding of the chess game being played between the state and our freedom. If you are still stuck in the mindset of cryptocurrency taking over the world, you haven’t figured it out yet, because traditional finance, one of the most effective tools of the state, has absorbed cryptocurrency within its demonic system. The state will not lose this battle in the short term, so adjust your time frames and do not get complacent, because what we have witnessed over only the past decade is the dismantling of what was once the mighty and terrifying Bitcoin. As darknet market maximalists, we cherish utility, because utility is what guarantees adoption, and any type of adoption now is better than hypothetical adoption in the future. And this is why we study darknet markets, because they represent the oldest and largest peer-to-peer economy dependent on cryptocurrency that is currently active and vibrant.

5. Making Cryptocurrency Scary Again

The newcomers will find this hard to believe, but cryptocurrency was once a very scary topic. Bitcoin in particular had a direct association with criminal activity, and for many of us this is how we first came in contact with cryptocurrency, whether from in-person hearsay of The Silk Road or from pearl-clutching opinion pieces in newspapers about a mysterious new internet money used by drug dealers. In the early days there were no regulations, and so conversation usually turned to how Bitcoin would be banned, and how the underground drug economy that used it would lead to mass arrests, and eventually confiscation of cryptocurrency from law-abiding citizens. Bitcoin, especially in its early days, was a playground for cypherpunks dedicated to the advancement of peer-to-peer cash. Their tolerance of HODL culture was largely in part due to the great financial uncertainty surrounding the project. Once the number did go up, higher than anyone could have imagined, the idealism was replaced, and those cypherpunks were either subjected to docility or excommunicated from the project they helped build. What remains is a collection of Core members sympathetic to the erroneous global adoption myth and even encouraging of it. The enlightened cypherpunks, who have now become hardened into darknet market maximalists, are embarrassed and angered that this monster has been created. Greed has won, and crooks like Saylor have risen to the top.

Bitcoin has now reached mainstream appeal without any semblance of its origins. Many celebrities, business executives, and politicians champion Bitcoin today, which, ten years ago, would have been career suicide. But what has Bitcoin gained from this mainstream acceptance? The moonboy will point to the price chart, the ETFs, and the co-signs from the aforementioned celebrities. But the cypherpunks know this is all smoke and mirrors. What actually happened was the dramatic expansion of Know Your Customer/Anti-Money Laundering legislation, the development of blockchain surveillance technology, the influx of legal battles meant to take away our rights, and the relentless lobbying that is occurring on Capitol Hill right now. Over time, the state realized that Bitcoin and other cryptocurrencies are relatively harmless without base-layer privacy, and instead of fighting it directly, boiling the frog by snipping away at the fringe advocacy groups would suffice in getting what they want. And their game plan has worked. Bitcoin’s conversion from peer-to-peer cash to a digital tech stock has been fully realized and the cypherpunk values that got us here in the first place have been whitewashed.

But there is an irony to Bitcoin’s transition into a sterile and corporate-friendly digital asset, that being that Bitcoin has lost all of its aura in the process. Consider the rebellious and terrifying status that Bitcoin had in the early days of The Silk Road and contrast this with Michael Saylor’s headshot on the cover of Forbes magazine. All of the bite, all of the power, all of what made cryptocurrency unique as a threat to the traditional finance system is gone, relegated instead to a limp caricature of what it once was. The identity crisis that Bitcoin finds itself in is an afterthought to the moonboy, who considers this development as natural progression, analogous to how the internet, once a wacky wild west of decentralized websites, is now streamlined in several politically correct social media applications. They view Bitcoin’s change as positive, with the idea that a state-approved path of least resistance serves the greater good for humanity. Or, at least this is what they’ve convinced themselves, as any darknet market maximalist who looks at the bigger picture is quick to point out the downsides of handwaving away the fight against the state, which has unquestionably led to the growth of the usecase of the store of value as opposed to the continuation of a medium of exchange.

The good news is the free market is relentless, and it will find a way. The darknet markets, and by extension, the usage of peer-to-peer cash in defiance of regulations, will always exist. And so, in the absence of Bitcoin’s improvements, darknet markets have looked elsewhere. The well-documented rise in popularity of Monero on darknet markets fills the need for digital cash where Bitcoin is no longer good enough, and likewise, it is now Monero that is targeted through regulations, fear, and uncertainty. Of course, the moonboy points to Monero’s poor relative price performance as the outcome of this, but the darknet market maximalist sees these delistings as a proof of concept and an endorsement from chain analysis companies of a superior medium of exchange. If regulation friendly Bitcoin was seen as threatening, powerful, and ultimately a threat to the state, it would also be removed from exchanges. So why isn’t that happening? Why is Monero scaring exchanges and not Bitcoin? What makes it all the more powerful? And slowly, the aura and clout around Monero grow, with the fear and uncertainty that surround it acting as a subtle advertisement that demonstrates just how powerful peer-to-peer cash is from the perspective of the powers that be.

There is something about the culture of cryptocurrency today that exudes anything but authenticity. The culture, if you can call it that, is a medley of third-world scams, memes, and degenerate wagering. None of it is serious. Many people share this opinion, and moonboys enjoy this insult with shades of irony, viewing it as a badge of honor and relishing in the clown world instead of challenging it. But there is one thing in cryptocurrency that is taken serious because of how formidable it is, and that is the use of peer-to-peer cash on darknet markets. Like the respect that Tony Soprano would receive when entering a restaurant, the moonboys and even the crypto-averse nocoiners who mock anything tangentially related to cryptocurrency bow their heads in recognition. Innately, everyone acknowledges the power that digital cash can hold over nation-states, and this is demonstrated by the implied power that is presented by an uncontrollable open source project being used by criminal enterprises around the world. But this fact is often downplayed, obscured, and frowned upon. The mainstream opinion within cryptocurrency argues that cryptocurrency is much more than its early darknet adoption, so it should be ignored, but the wiser man views this fact as a bellweather, utilization that signals something that repels the state. Try as they might to remove the stigma carried by darknet adoption, it follows cryptocurrency as a reminder of what is at stake, and this fact is not lost on the darknet market maximalist.

6. The Tactical Nuke to Short-Circuit the Bitcoin Moonboy

Despite the considerable clout attained from darknet usage, the moonboy will jump at the opportunity to downplay any association with criminal activity. They will remark that the underground drug economy is comparatively minuscule, that the Bitcoin market cap dwarfs such a thing, and that it is better to not have the tarnished reputation in the eyes of the law-abiding populace. But worse, when confronted with Bitcoin’s diminishing adoption on these darknet markets, they will often refer to a reputable project like Monero as a “shitcoin,” branding this digital cash alternative that has taken Bitcoin’s darknet market share as nothing more than a distraction from generational wealth. So I would now like to offer you my patented way of embarrassing this Bitcoin moonboy who has lost sight of the bigger picture. It is a little trick that I’ve picked up that, to date, has worked 100% of the time. All you need to do is say the following:

“If Monero is a shitcoin, how is it that Monero has overtaken Bitcoin as the most used cryptocurrency on darknet markets? Because despite Bitcoin’s massive advantage in network effect and liquidity, Monero has become the most used cryptocurrency on the oldest and largest peer-to-peer economy dependent on peer-to-peer cash.”

The reason this statement is so effective is because the people on darknet markets do not use peer-to-peer cryptocurrency because they want to. Rather, the people on darknet markets are using peer-to-peer cryptocurrency because they need to. They have no other choice. If you were to magically wish away cryptocurrency, these peer-to-peer markets would largely no longer exist because they would have no other simple way of transferring value. In addition, the users of these darknet markets do not have the tribalistic fixation of “number-go-up” that plagues cryptocurrency. They are not waking up, jumping out of bed, opening their windows, and screaming their love for digital cash for all the world to hear. They are not bragging to their friends about how much cryptocurrency they own. No, they are buying digital cash like it is gasoline for their automobile. It is a necessity. And in this illicit environment, which, mind you, is incredibly dangerous, requiring the most battle-tested and powerful utility of value transfer, they have elected to use little Monero over the oh-so-mighty Bitcoin.

The problem for the moonboy is that this question is framed on utility instead of price. The moonboy, who only ever thinks in price, is now forced to imagine a scenario that is based on dependency. In response to the above statement, the moonboy is trained to show a chart of the price of Monero, and how it has, relative to Bitcoin, underperformed. But what the moonboy does not realize is that this makes it all the more impressive, because despite Monero’s lack of price appreciation, Monero has surpassed the highly liquid Bitcoin in a market where people’s lives depend on uncensorable digital cash. Why aren’t they using Bitcoin instead? How did Monero overcome this substantial network effect? Don’t they know that Monero is “far less secure” than Bitcoin? Why are they using a shitcoin instead of the Lightning Network? The moonboy’s head begins to spin. This “tactical nuke”, and the many variations like it, eradicate the moonboy’s criticism that is made against Monero. This is not based on speculation; this is a non-biased view of the free market, and it is happening right now.

What the Bitcoin moonboy won’t admit is that this is, in a way, emasculating. Accustomed to convincing others that there is no second best, they must now confront the preference of Monero by hardened criminals. This is made worse because they lack the technical knowledge to debate the cypherpunk, and because they are often too scared to do the research for themselves and read a hidden service like Dread to confirm this reality. This unwinnable situation causes them to flee back to their echo chamber or accept that perhaps there are other projects worth learning. And it isn’t just Bitcoin, other projects that criticize Monero’s privacy must overcome the fact that it was Monero that was chosen as opposed to their project. This insurmountable fact is caused by many factors, which we will examine in more detail later on, and lends credence to our adage that the cryptocurrency of choice on darknet markets is what is ultimately worth studying.

It should be noted that our study of internet black markets is focused primarily on drug markets, which can be found by those curious enough to go searching on Tor. The actual darknet economy is difficult to define and accounts for far more than drug markets, such as scams, ransomware, and weapons, among other illicit goods and services. For example, arguments can be made that stablecoins, a perversion of cryptocurrency that digitally pegs an asset to fiat, are used in greater volumes than either Monero or Bitcoin, in large part due to their lack of volatility and strong liquidity. Others may point out that there is a significant amount of illegal trade on social media platforms like Instagram or through chat protocols such as Telegram. Of course, fiat in general dwarfs cryptocurrency usage, so it’s no surprise to read articles of stablecoin adoption by Mexican cartels and Chinese crime syndicates or of well-documented third-world adoption for crypto advocates that want to preserve their value with the dollar. However, reputable estimates are unheard of, especially ones with accuracy, so it is sounder to focus on “traditional” markets with heightened opsec that are used by the common man, these being markets found on hidden service aggregates such as Tor Taxi, as they are more relevant as to how peer-to-peer cash developed into what it is today. Besides, future stablecoin legislation and clampdowns on social media sites will effectively push criminals to hardened types of cryptocurrency, and likely the one with a proven reputation on these drug darknet markets.

To be clear, this manifesto is not a sales pitch for Monero. The darknet market maximalist does not have any allegiance to a cryptocurrency project, for they do not approach cryptocurrency as a means of financial gain. The darknet market maximalist endorses Monero but also points out that Bitcoin’s liquidity and transparent nature are important tradeoffs and that, despite Bitcoin’s neutering over the past decade, it still is used on darknet markets, still prevalent in ransomware demands, and is still a liquid on-ramp with an ongoing small but passionate cypherpunk culture well worth fraternizing with. In fact, the darknet market maximalist would be quick to point out the irony of a growing Monero maximalist rhetoric, which, inverse to the Bitcoin moonboy of today, hypes up the possible “face melting gains” that could be had from a project that follows the cypherpunk origins of Bitcoin as the cryptocurrency of choice on the darknet. The Monero maximalist in many ways uses the same fraudulent tactics as the Bitcoin maximalist to achieve their dream of financial prosperity by looking at the illicit markets as a bellwether and embracing the stigma as a propaganda tool. Indeed, the power of free market adoption, especially when juxtaposed by the characteristic of utility as opposed to number-go-up speculation, is a powerful concept that provides proof of value even to the most unknowledgable of individuals—in fact, his manifesto is based on that. But romanticizing the stigma attached to darknet markets with the goal of becoming rich is no better than the degenerate maximalist who worships Michael Saylor. It is based on the fiat value going up and, left untethered, will lead us right back to the situation we find ourselves in today with Bitcoin.

7. Joe the Mechanic

It’s an undeniable truth that darknet market usage is a simple way of proving that a peer-to-peer cryptocurrency works. Even the “normies” who don’t have a horse in this race raise their eyebrows at the thought of law enforcement having little remedy to prevent the transfer of digital cash. However, there is an interesting dynamic that we must highlight: that being how darknet market users don’t particularly care about the price of cryptocurrency or even the underlying technology. Outside of some minor annoyances in short-term price volatility, for the darknet market user, their interest in something like Monero or Bitcoin is strictly based on satisfying a step on the checklist to acquire something. They have little understanding of the tradeoffs that different projects have and have no exposure to the meta or debates in places such as crypto Twitter. It may seem silly to spend time thinking about this demographic of agnostics, but any researcher of darknet markets would point out that they actually represent the greater portion of the cryptocurrency economy that is reliant on peer-to-peer cash usage and not speculation.

If we close our eyes and imagine a news article about the dark web, we can see the picture they choose to illustrate the story: it is an image of a man in a sweatshirt with a hood over his face, perhaps wearing a Guy Fawkes mask, typing away at the command line interface of a laptop. For many people, hidden services are a completely foreign concept that only experienced computer users can reach, but the truth is that most darknet users are regular people who have absolutely no idea what they are doing, often with computer experience amounting to posting on Reddit and knowing how to access the Windows task manager. To illustrate this point, let’s imagine a scenario with a regular guy named Joe. He is a mechanic who likes to play video games. Joe works long shifts and to cope with his existence, like many other twenty or thirty-somethings, he decides to partake in some illegal substances. He is apprehensive about finding a drug dealer but after hearing from a friend that this is possible with the internet, he decides to try it out. How would he go about doing this?

Joe the mechanic is not going to spend dozens of hours reading white papers about different types of cryptocurrency, nor is he going to immerse himself in the debates between different projects. Joe has absolutely no idea how any of this works, and he becomes increasingly annoyed with the information overload that is happening to him when he begins his research. He just wants something that is proven to work, and so when he visits the darknet sites, he subsequently learns that Monero and Bitcoin are cryptocurrencies that are adopted, and this is all the information that he desires. He follows the herd. From there, he will find a guide on the internet on how to acquire cryptocurrency, and he likewise follows that advice step by step. Because Joe is looking for the path of least resistance, he will happily use a centralized exchange, utilize a wallet with a coinswap exchange built into it, and not consider the lurking attack vectors that can be exploited by chain analysis companies. At no point does Joe ever really question anything or read any more information than he needs to get from point A to point B. The little secret about the darknet is that many of its users are like Joe, at least at first. They begin their journey as uninformed laymen and follow directions from other Joes who have gotten further than them.

This is not to say that Joe the Mechanic’s actions are ill-informed—they aren’t! I would argue that Joe is being extremely rational in recognizing that he is out of his element, so logically he would elect the tools chosen by the free market, such as Monero, Tor, and PGP. He likewise then relies on helpful guides published by other individuals who have figured out the process, and as time passes, a refined approach in getting from point A to point B is established. Now you may be wondering, if Joe the mechanic is following the path of least resistance, won’t he just use Bitcoin considering the increased difficulty that he may have in acquiring Monero? And yes, it is true that there are markets that still accept Bitcoin, and so Joe can very well reach the conclusion that he might as well just use Bitcoin. However, the longer that Monero is successfully adopted, the more that the behavior of not using Monero is frowned upon, and we inevitably reach a point where even Joe is wondering why people are using Bitcoin instead of Monero. This is already seen today with the largest drug darknet market, Archetyp Market, being a Monero only peer-to-peer platform, and we can be assured that many Joe the mechanics are actively using it.

The chicken and egg problem facing peer-to-peer cryptocurrency is that to have darknet adoption, you need darknet adoption. This paradox is overcome by a passionate and dedicated grassroots movement that has built trust and reputation over time. It takes exhaustive promotion from individuals who aren’t afraid to go to the areas that aren’t politically correct or regulatory friendly, which are exactly the areas that have a use for peer-to-peer cash. And as the darknet market maximalist points out, the usage of peer-to-peer cash in these squalid areas of the internet is reflective of the greater purpose of peer-to-peer cash, which can then be applied in many positive ways for the common man against the state. Amusingly enough, Joe’s utilization of Monero is a monthly inconvenience, and if he were to have his way, he would use PayPal or even his credit card instead when purchasing drugs on the internet. And so the ultimate irony here is realized: that the most important drivers of peer-to-peer cash usage are often technical noobs who barely understand why they are using cryptocurrency in the first place. Ultimately, this exemplifies the importance of built-in privacy and how spending time considering the actions of the lowly drug user during a cryptocurrency’s development will benefit the greater good of the project. The utilization from Joe the Mechanic is fuel that propels peer-to-peer cash forward, and this is acknowledged by the darknet market maximalist, who doesn’t berate the individual for missing out on generational wealth, but observes this usage as a signal of how the state can be overcome by people like Joe, whether they know it or not.

8. An Ode to Ross Ulbricht

The darknet economy is an encrypted free market of men from all types of economic and social backgrounds. There are mechanics and finance bros, professors and salesmen, meatheads and junkies. They are people who we unknowingly see every day in person, but their online identities are anonymous, shielding behavior that is in defiance of the law, behavior that is condemned as immoral. Indeed, some are evil, but many are normal, functioning members of society who would help us in times of need. But even though this underground market may be hidden in the shadows, indecipherable to anyone attempting to peer inside, there still is some light that may inexplicably break through and shine towards the future.

And so a picture was taken the other day of a man in gray sweats with a bag over his shoulder, a potted plant, and a heartwarming smile. How sweet it was. The shared elation of the entire cypherpunk community doesn’t happen often, but I can assure you that this image, seemingly taken on a whim, sent a jubilant feeling around the world, just like how encrypted communications navigate our peer-to-peer networks. For the less informed, Ross Ulbricht may seem like a degenerate who has caused the creation of the economy we call the darknet today. But for the real ones, Dread Pirate Roberts was a visionary who saw how digital cash could change the world.

In the lore of cryptocurrency, the Silk Road is the mythic birthplace of Bitcoin. As the story goes, in some obscure corner of the internet, a nerdy hobbyist project was morphed into an unimaginable threat. Rumors spread of a website like Ebay where drugs are sold. A friend of a friend claimed he purchased cocaine there, and he swore by it. It sounded too good to be true. But as time passed, the general public consciousness slowly became aware of what seemed to be an impossible concept. And before you knew it, Bitcoin had entered the mainstream as a revolutionary counterweight to traditional finance. It was terrifying to the fence-sitters who can’t form opinions for themselves. It was terrifying to governments who do everything in their power to squash you like a bug. It was terrifying to the banking syndicate that has held us hostage for generations. It was absolutely incredible.

Here, though, we must pause to separate Dread Pirate Roberts, the metaphorical figure of counterprotest, and Ross, the human being. The heartbreaking detail that is misunderstood by many is that, by his own admission, Ross has great regret for the creation of the Silk Road. In his only public interview, at the 2021 Bitcoin conference, through his carefully chosen words you could imagine the tears welling in his eyes. It’s a brutally sincere confession, and, facing a life sentence, you can tell that he was in complete despair, filled with remorse, yearning for freedom. He referred to his 26 year old self as impulsive, which is contrary to the spirited anti-government symbol that many portray him as. Hearing that bright libertarian soul, someone quite like myself, so broken down by the confinement of federal prison made me realize that Ross wasn’t simply an idealist with dreams of overthrowing traditional finance but also a young, naive programmer who happened to be the first one to light the match.

If Ross had not made The Silk Road, it would have been inevitable that another individual would have made the same discovery. In retrospect, it doesn’t take a genius to figure out that uncensorable money can be used for illicit transactions, and criminals tend to become innovative when new technology is introduced to the general public. In addition, illicit internet markets had long existed before The Silk Road. Of course, they became much larger after the implementation of digital cash, but it only further proves that this booming dark net economy was going to happen regardless. And while critics point to The Silk Road as an ugly stain in Bitcoin’s history, it must be said that the things that have made Bitcoin worse go well beyond dark net markets. The true freedom of peer-to-peer cash was compromised by greed and a syndicate of vultures looking to become richer; in contrast, The Silk Road taught us that united peer-to-peer networks can be unstoppable even in a surveillance dystopia.

Peer-to-peer cash will never go away. It will always exist now. We have found it, we have discovered it, and we are now harvesting it. For decades to come, we will continue to innovate, and we will continue to adapt, and we will continue to protest, and please know that almost all of it will be for the good of humanity. So speaking to you Ross, understand that while you may feel remorse for what you have done, your contribution is something to not be ashamed of, and we’re happy you’re finally home.

9. A Brief History of Cryptocurrency Usage on Darknet Markets

Soon there were dozens of copycat onion websites looking to achieve the infamy that had been reached by Dread Pirate Roberts. Bitcoin adoption was thriving, law enforcement adapted, and thus the cat-and-mouse game of cryptocurrency saw its origins. The battlefield was the public ledger, and federal investigators began to successfully attack it with probabilistic analytical tools, which were able to tie identities to doxxed wallet addresses on centralized exchanges. Individuals began to get arrested, and in response the cypherpunk community saw a demand for the development of mixers and coinjoin protocols to remove deterministic links. Some projects were successful, but most failed. The formidable liquidity and network effect of Bitcoin stubbornly held its strong adoption rates, yet over time it began to be broken down further by a concentrated push of regulatory actions that expanded Know Your Customer and Anti Money Laundering legislation. From the perspective of Joe the mechanic, the process of acquiring Bitcoin from non-centralized exchanges became a chore, and the techniques for using Bitcoin became more convoluted.

Historically, there had been several markets to incorporate alternate cryptocurrencies, though their usage was minimal compared to the dominating adoption of Bitcoin. But as arrests began to pile up, market administrators and vendors began to change their tune, and in 2019, with the creation of White House Market, Monero officially entered the darknet economy as a powerhouse. Contrary to other marketplaces, White House Market enforced mandatory PGP and heavily promoted Monero. Bitcoin, still accepted on White House Market in its early stages, was eventually phased out entirely. At first, darknet users did not like how difficult White House was to use, but the emphasis on stronger opsec grew a cult following, which eventually grew into the largest darknet market in the world.

The snowball effect was gradual but organic. Darknet vendors, the individuals selling illicit goods, often use multiple marketplaces to increase the amount of clientele they have, so naturally, they were using Monero if they were using White House Market. This caused them to endorse adding Monero to other marketplaces, and one by one, other marketplaces began to do exactly that. Soon, other Monero-only marketplaces were launched, such as Alphabay 2 and Archetyp Market. The transitory period from Bitcoin dominance to Monero dominance has taken place over the past 5 years, starting in late 2019. Today, most marketplaces are Monero-only, and, likely within the next few years, Bitcoin usage on these markets will be completely vanquished. Monero is now the king of darknet markets, and by extension, the king of peer-to-peer cash.

Monero covers all the bases that a successor of Bitcoin should exemplify. Its culture is grassroots, open-source, and community-driven. Like Bitcoin, there is no dev tax or premine, which minimizes the risk of the project going astray due to regulations or developers being targeted. The mining protocol is first in its class, adopting Random X to dissuade the ASIC mining monopoly that has plagued Bitcoin, instead putting the mining power back to the user with a mining algorithm that is optimized for CPUs. The extensive miner network, as well as the more technically literate user base promotes Linux and FOSS. Its research team is renowned with several influential contributions to the ecosystem, and its developers have proven capable of dealing with timely patches to thwart bad actors. The blocks are dynamic in size and the fees are low. And, perhaps what is most enticing for someone that isn’t technically savvy, like Joe the mechanic, is s Monero’s built-in privacy, which will put even the dumbest user at a level equal if not ahead of, a well-studied Bitcoin user.

But above all else, what drives a peer-to-peer cryptocurrency is the unrelenting passion of cypherpunk anarchism that emanates from its core user base. The culture must be skeptical, distrustful of regulations, and vocally against the state. They must promote usage and not hoarding. They must draw a line in the sand for privacy rights that will not be encroached. The vigor that comes from standing for something you believe in helps push the project forward, whether it is the technical development or its grassroots promotion to individuals who are unfamiliar with the project. Ultimately, it is the philosophy of the project that will guarantee its long-term influence, and all too often this fact is lost on people. How often do I hear from the well-meaning cryptocurrency enthusiast who wishes to distance himself from moonboyism that he is in cryptocurrency “for the tech.” This mindset is a step in the right direction, but meaningless. A focus on the underlying cryptography, the programming, and the innovations in blockchains can be fulfilling for an academic, but it lacks zeal. But from the perspective of the darknet market maximalist, this is a sideshow that doesn’t actually amount to anything, and this is because ultimately the technology, while important, plays second fiddle to the soul, and for peer-to-peer cash, that soul is found in its crypto anarchism. Without that passion to fight the state, the project is ultimately worthless, even with venture capitalist backing and endorsements from celebrities. Peer-to-peer cash is an opportunity for the cypherpunk to change the financial world completely, and a project that isn’t fighting anything isn’t worth supporting, because it would mean that project is embedded in the traditional financial system that must be fought against.

10. The Clout-Building Stage and the Inevitability of Moonboyism

Monero is currently in the clout-building stage, the period in time in which a peer-to-peer cryptocurrency is seeing thriving adoption on darknet markets, the type of utilization that makes even the most pathetic of laser-eyed maximalists take notice. The respect bestowed on Monero is not based on its price but on the legitimate use case that it continues to prove. Every day, people who don’t care about cryptocurrency are being onboarded to using Monero because they have no other choice. And as more people learn about this cutting-edge peer-to-peer cash, it gets used more in all clearnet markets, and like an unyielding current of water, the darknet adoption provides a constant demand that flows into everything else. Just look at any clearnet business that publishes transaction data, or ask any privacy advocate about their preferred cryptocurrencies. It is clear that Monero is the standard of peer-to-peer cash, the only cryptocurrency to encroach on Bitcoin’s dominating reign on the darknet.

The irony is not lost on me that, by writing about Monero’s prolific rise in illicit markets, I myself am contributing to the cult of Monero moonboyism. This is not my intention, but as a darknet market maximalist, it is clear which peer-to-peer cash is the heavyweight champion. The artwork that I have chosen for this project shows the iconic Silk Road camel reimagined with a sharp orange hue and the innocent personification Monero-chan, signifying the notable transition towards Monero over time. But it also represents the shifting tide of peer-to-peer cash, which has been beaten down by regulations, but has also adapted and improved. Monero strikes back with a counterhook, which has staggered the state, but this fight doesn’t end in only a few rounds. We must be vigilant and uncompromising, because moonboyism will corrupt Monero like it did with Bitcoin if we do not tread lightly.

So how must we fight back? We can examine how the community involved with Samourai Wallet reacted to give us an insight into how veterans from a generation before us were dealing with the repercussions of an open source project that has economic scarcity. What we saw isn’t exactly reassuring. The contrast between the traditionalists and the onslaught of fresh-faced noobs that they dealt with is the exact divide we have illustrated in this manifesto, and what is striking is how this difference in opinion was seemingly unstoppable. Bitcoin, which financially had benefited tremendously from its groundbreaking mainstream recognition, had lost almost all of its intensity, and so to compensate for that, the remaining cypherpunks in Bitcoin took to mocking anyone who got in their path, and it was successful. Samourai Wallet was in many ways a rallying point for the cypherpunks doing everything they could to fight back against Saylor and his deranged mob. For a time, it was an oasis in a desert of degenerate gambling. What the culture of Samourai Wallet brought was a clear distinction between the two schools of thought that cannot coexist: The pro-statist vs. the cypherpunk; greed vs. utility; the moonboy vs. the dark net market maximalist.

But the tragedy that faces peer-to-peer cash is that moonboyism is inevitable. Unlike FOSS projects like VLC, Debian, or PostgreSQL, cryptocurrency has scarcity, and with that scarcity comes potentially lucrative investments. And so with Monero, it is clear that its artificially limited supply, as well as its ever-growing clout, can entice moonboys to throw their support behind the project, looking for the “next Bitcoin,” which will yield mind-blowing gains. Bitcoin, to them, is what antiquated boomers buy and hold. Monero is edgy and scary. The cycle repeats, with the wave of fraudulent investors espousing their new-found beliefs that privacy is really important, as if they really care. Though indeed, their investment does have merit, because darknet market usage is the most powerful status that peer-to-peer cash can attain. A cryptocurrency that is being used on darknet markets is probably what we want in the future. It is a counterbalance to fiat, a virtual hedge, and digital Swiss bank—even I must concede that the moonboy has a good argument.

Yet the darknet market maximalist is not concerned for the price but rather for the philosophy. We are a hardened bunch, cypherpunks who have seen the life cycle of Bitcoin play out with its positive and negative developments, and therefore, we are wise to the pitfalls that lie ahead. Because just like how the smallest government inevitably becomes the largest, so too did Bitcoin become corrupted by the system it was meant to replace. But what cannot be replaced is our relentless idealism, that ardent crypto-anarchism which pushes back against a looming cyber dystopia. If our beliefs and protocols are attacked, they only become further hardened, encrypted beyond recognition, buried further in the weeds. Behind all the noise of cryptocurrency, the constant momentum created by darknet markets cannot be understated, for as long as life continues, these markets will exist, propelled by the invention of peer-to-peer cash. The spirit of crypto-anarchism lives on with it, is invigorated by it, and over time peer-to-peer cash will seep into all facets of traditional finance, just like encryption has managed to do with internet networks and computers. So as a darknet market maximalist, we invest not in cryptocurrency bags, but in pure idealism! And we do this not for generational wealth, but because our future generations will depend on us.

xenu@antimoonboy.com (xenu) — Mon, 01 Jan 0001 00:00:00 +0000

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1. Una introducción al maximalismo del mercado de la darknet

En algún lugar del camino, es difícil decir cuándo, la contracultura fue subvertida. Lo que antaño fuera un temeroso y agitador descubrimiento tecnológico hoy ha sido transformado en un vehículo de apuestas sensacionalista. Las banderas de Gadsden han sido sustituidas por gráficos de precios, y los cypherpunks están siendo ahogados por influencers en redes sociales. Muchos veteranos todavía se aferran a la creencia de que el aura de Bitcoin no ha sido completamente erosionada; de que la colaboración con el sector financiero tradicional es en realidad algo bueno; de que las solicitudes para crear reservas estratégicas estatales demuestran madurez y legitimidad; y de que huir de los así llamados decrépitos orígenes de la Silk Road significa que Bitcoin puede finalmente convertirse en dinero global. Pero todos sabemos que eso es una farsa, porque lo que una vez fue catalogado como un sistema electrónico de dinero en efectivo peer-to-peer se ha convertido, nada más y nada menos, en una glorificada acción de una empresa tecnológica cualquiera.

Y por esto propongo el maximalismo del mercado de la darknet.

Ahora bien, déjame aclarar algo: esto no es una aprobación de la actividad delictiva, ni es una incitación al crimen. Por el contrario, es una aceptación de que el mayor grupo de personas que dependen de las criptomonedas peer-to-peer son, precisamente, aquellos individuos que participan en los mercados negros de internet. Imagina una situación que requiera de un dinero digital privado y aguerrido; siguiendo a la lógica, concluirás que este será adoptado precisamente en esas economías subterráneas. Considera lo siguiente: ¿Qué tipo de persona utiliza criptomonedas como herramienta y no como cuenta de ahorro? ¿Quién se estresa al saber que no puede acceder a ellas? ¿Quién se las toma en serio, como una cuestión de libertad o prisión, y no como un estúpido meme? La respuesta son aquellos individuos que operan en esos mercados de la darknet; porque si las criptomonedas desaparecieran por arte de magia, la economía subterránea de internet colapsaría de la noche a la mañana. El efectivo digital incensurable ha permitido que el hombre promedio pueda realizar actividades que no están aprobadas por su gobierno, con tremendas implicaciones globales, como disuadir con éxito la discriminación de precios, la minería de datos o los anuncios dirigidos. Asimismo, hoy es posible donar a movimientos políticos en todo el mundo de forma segura y anónima, e incluso hacerlo con un patrimonio cifrado, cuya visibilidad depende únicamente de tu llave privada y de tu decisión consciente de divulgar esa información o no. A pesar del control casi total que ejerce sobre todo medio e instrumento financiero, el Estado posee poco poder sobre las redes de dinero en efectivo peer-to-peer y sus nodos, alojados por todo el mundo gracias a apasionados voluntarios. Esto no es el resultado de miles de millones de dólares de inversión por parte de los Estados nación, sino de la determinación de criptoanarquistas pertenecientes a comunidades de código abierto. De hecho, Bitcoin fue creado un fatídico día por uno de esos entusiastas anónimos que se ocultaba en una lista de correo cypherpunk. Podría decirse que es el mayor logro de código abierto de la historia, y todavía lo estamos asimilando.

Soy consciente de que a la darknet se le asocian la mala fama y el estigma, pero estamos hablando del uso en el mundo real. Hablamos de adopción basada exclusivamente en efectivo peer-to-peer. Es una vara de medir a la que podemos señalar y concluir que está ocurriendo. No es un sueño imposible, como los que llenan esos cansinos podcasts sobre criptomonedas, en los que se clama por un mundo ejecutado en la cadena de bloques. No, esta es la realidad, y aquellos que evitan esta conversación no merecen ni la hora del día. Algunos protestarán diciendo que esa vinculación es perjudicial, pero esos individuos no conocen las reglas del juego: porque desde la perspectiva del Estado, un ciudadano legal que promueve la privacidad es tan peligroso como un yonqui que intenta conseguir su próximo chute. Por ello, aunque la polarizante etiqueta de “maximalista del mercado de la darknet” puede generar algún escrúpulo, esta no es más que un reflejo de cómo ellos te ven en realidad.

Debo confesarte, querido lector, que el término “maximalismo del mercado de la darknet” es un troleo irónico. Soy plenamente consciente de que quien lea por encima el título de este manifiesto saltará de inmediato a la errónea conclusión de que yo y mis semejantes estamos empeñados en derrocar al gobierno, de que somos todos criminales o tal vez incluso ciberterroristas. Pero este escrito no es para ellos. Somos cypherpunks que abogan por el software libre de código abierto y comprendemos la tediosa batalla que tenemos por delante. Como ya nos tachan de tipos malos con algo que esconder, lo admitimos medio en broma, nos apoyamos en ello y planteamos la conversación bajo estos términos: para empezar, ¿por qué asociar ese estigma al software libre y de código abierto? Además, hay tantos tipos distintos de “maximalistas” a día de hoy que es fácil perder la cuenta. Por ejemplo, puedo fácilmente referirme a mí mismo como maximalista del efectivo digital o maximalista de la privacidad. Pero en esta era donde el interés es difícil de captar, se necesita de algo chocante —más aún si se basa en la razón— para que la gente preste atención. Porque, de forma similar, el auge de los mercados en la darknet a inicios de la década de 2010 causó un enorme interés por Bitcoin. Por lo tanto, al centrar nuestro enfoque en el uso de criptomonedas en los mercados de la darknet, recordamos una ventaja de estas que ha sido olvidada, pero que es plenamente necesaria para la proliferación a largo plazo de economías paralelas, las cuales amenazan el statu quo del dinero fíat.

Antes de terminar la introducción, me gustaría tomar un momento para agradecer a quienes hoy usan criptomonedas, a los que promueven economías paralelas y a los que impulsan deliberadamente su adopción. Aunque tenga opiniones discordantes en algunos temas concretos, de verdad aprecio a aquellos que todavía mantienen viva la llama. Porque no es cierto, en ningún sentido, que las criptomonedas solo se usen para la actividad ilícita. Desafortunadamente, somos una minoría, y muy pequeña, debo añadir. Actualmente, las criptomonedas se usan en su abrumadora mayoría como apuestas y vehículos de especulación, y esto solo empeorará si no oponemos resistencia. Después de lavar la imagen de las criptomonedas, pintándolas como un ecosistema amigable y no exclusivo para criminales, la absurda paradoja está en que hemos perdido esa intensidad trascendental que hacía al efectivo peer-to-peer tan poderoso en primera instancia. Y por todo eso, debemos devolver las cosas a sus raíces y convertirnos en maximalistas del mercado de la darknet.

2. Sobre el moonboyismo

Antes de poder entender por qué el maximalista del mercado de la darknet está iluminado, debemos examinar la raíz de todos los problemas de las criptomonedas: el moonboy. Contrario a lo que puedas pensar, los problemas que enfrentan las criptomonedas no son, por ejemplo, las batallas regulatorias con el Estado, las limitaciones tecnológicas de la cadena de bloques o la necesidad de mejorar la opinión pública sobre las criptomonedas. Estos tres asuntos, entre otros, solo son problemáticos desde la perspectiva del moonboy. Pero desde la perspectiva del maximalista del mercado de la darknet, el verdadero problema es la inevitable condición humana de la codicia, y no hay mejor ejemplo de ello que la estridente y patética subclase de moonboys, cuya participación en las criptomonedas se reduce a una febril especulación y al estudio de gráficos de precios. La desesperada situación en la que se encuentra el efectivo peer-to-peer es el resultado directo de este continuo ataque del 51% a la opinión pública por parte del moonboy, quien ha hecho todo lo posible por erosionar el alma de las criptomonedas durante la última década.

El moonboy es un cypherpunk solo de nombre, que promociona su amor por Satoshi en vanos intentos de parecer culto. Son fraudulentos, arrogantes, tribalistas y crédulos. Muchos de ellos no dedican tiempo a aprender sobre software libre y de código abierto, optando en su lugar por consumir basura propietaria, siendo sus únicas contribuciones al ecosistema los retuits de GIFs de montañas rusas durante los ciclos impredecibles del mercado de las criptomonedas. Son complacientes y creen que los políticos con fotomontajes de ojos láser se preocupan por ellos. Pero he aquí la peor parte: debido a su codicia insaciable, se sobrendeudan con la esperanza de un gran beneficio económico. Y esta deuda hace que el moonboy sea fácilmente manipulable, llevándolo a tomar decisiones en contra del idealismo para el que fueron creadas las criptomonedas.

Nuestro rechazo al moonboyismo no es un desacuerdo con la inversión. Existe una estrategia de inversión clara y racional para muchos activos de criptomonedas debido a la propiedad de la escasez. Hay inversores, por ejemplo, que promueven el almacenamiento en cold storage y que son buena gente y valiosos contribuyentes para la comunidad. El moonboy, sin embargo, es la mayoría vocal de los poseedores de criptomonedas hoy en día, atraídos por el volátil mercado libre, que fomenta las potenciales “ganancias descomunales” que podrían permitirles convertirse en el próximo emprendedor de Silicon Valley. Peor aún, mientras mantienen esta actitud degenerada de apostador, creen que actúan desde una posición de virtud debido a su respaldo a Satoshi y a la ahora diluida visión del mundo que los primeros cypherpunks defendían. El moonboy es un hipócrita hasta la médula, apropiándose del término bitcoiner para que ahora signifique pro-censura y pro-Estado, siempre y cuando garantice la seguridad de sus rendimientos.

Volvamos atrás y repasemos los tres “problemas” antes mencionados a los que se enfrentan las criptomonedas y demostremos cómo difieren los puntos de vista del moonboy y del maximalista del mercado de la darknet:

Problema uno: Las regulaciones gubernamentales crean incertidumbre sobre las criptomonedas.

El moonboy: “Si el gobierno aprueba cierta legislación, podría hacer que mis criptomonedas valgan más/menos. Si se puede llegar a un compromiso, vamos por el buen camino”.

El maximalista del mercado de la darknet: “Nos preocupa preservar las libertades civiles y lucharemos con uñas y dientes para defenderlas. No habrá compromisos”.

Problema dos: Las limitaciones tecnológicas de la cadena de bloques impiden la adopción generalizada.

El moonboy: “Debemos hacer todo lo posible por convertirnos en una moneda global, aunque eso signifique promocionar software propietario, porque más gente significa que mi bag valdrá más”.

El maximalista del mercado de la darknet: “Es fundamentalmente cierto que la cadena de bloques no es idónea para una adopción mundial sin centralización. Por lo tanto, continuaremos creciendo y mejorando orgánicamente, sin doblegarnos ante estas soluciones centralizadas, porque nos preocupa nuestra libertad”.

Problema tres: La opinión pública sobre las criptomonedas es negativa debido a la falta de confianza alimentada por la volatilidad y las estafas.

El moonboy: “Debemos seguir promocionando las criptomonedas para generar confianza y que a largo plazo más gente compre, porque así mis criptomonedas valdrán más y ellos también podrán hacerse ricos”.

El maximalista del mercado de la darknet: “El objetivo es construir economías paralelas. Si a la gente no le interesan las criptomonedas peer-to-peer, está bien, pero debemos explicar los beneficios del efectivo peer-to-peer y predicar con ejemplo”.

Podríamos continuar, pero la idea debería estar clara: por un lado, tienes un estilo de vida de codicia que hace cosplay de idealismo, y por el otro, un examen fundamentado del mercado libre impulsado por el idealismo. En otras palabras, el maximalista del mercado de la darknet reconoce que buscar el sueño de Satoshi de un efectivo peer-to-peer lo ha convertido en un objetivo del Estado y que la masa que decide la opinión pública solo sigue la mano invisible de la codicia. Estos dos grupos no pueden coexistir y, debido a la posición populista que ostentan los moonboys, el maximalista del mercado de la darknet es expulsado del discurso mediante la censura.

Quizás la mejor manera de resumir las diferencias entre estos dos grupos sea la propia darknet. ¿Cómo ven ambos grupos el uso del efectivo peer-to-peer en los mercados de la darknet para fines ilícitos?

El moonboy: “La darknet representa la época de los inicios de las criptomonedas; ya hemos superado eso. Sí, los criminales usan criptomonedas en los mercados de la darknet, pero las criptomonedas pueden aportar mucho más valor que eso. Esta asociación es tóxica”.

El maximalista del mercado de la darknet: “La darknet es el mercado peer-to-peer más antiguo y extenso que depende exclusivamente de las criptomonedas. Observar su uso en este aguerrido mercado revela qúe proyectos vale la pena estudiar. Ya que, a medida que la computación continue volviéndose más cerrada y centralizada, será imprescindible mantener libres los proyectos de código abierto. Sobre todo el efectivo digital.

El moonboy no está necesariamente equivocado, ya que existen muchos casos de uso para las criptomonedas que van más allá de comprar drogas en internet. Sin embargo, el moonboy no logra comprender lo esencial: las poderosas implicaciones del efectivo peer-to-peer y la larga guerra por los derechos de privacidad que aguarda. ¿Por qué no quiere entenderlo? Porque el moonboy no luchará contra el Estado; así que esto no le preocupa. Para el moonboy, preservar la libertad juega un papel secundario frente a hacer crecer su inversión, por lo que cualquier asociación con la actividad ilícita es herejía para él. No tienen motivos para pronunciarse en contra del Estado, y cuando las regulaciones lleguen, obedecerá lo que se le diga. Pero el cypherpunk, alineado con el maximalista del mercado de la darknet, abraza la batalla legal y habla abiertamente sobre el documentado uso ilícito de las criptomonedas. ¿Por qué, podrías preguntar? Porque ambos son conscientes del juego que se está jugando. Al adherirse a los mercados de la darknet, enmarcan la conversación en sus propios términos, porque entienden que el Estado ve nuestra lucha por la libertad como una molestia que debe ser aplastada. El maximalista del mercado de la darknet comprende que es objetivo del Estado promover el crecimiento del moonboyismo y censurar a los disidentes, y que jugar limpio no vale la pena. Así que marquemos una línea en la arena: si el uso del efectivo peer-to-peer me convierte en un criminal por asociación, entonces soy un criminal. El maximalista del mercado de la darknet suscribe esa declaración, viendo el mercado libre de manera fría e imparcial, y el moonboy retrocede horrorizado, equiparando ese tipo de idealismo con una confrontación innecesaria que va en contra de la razón por la que compró criptomonedas en primer lugar.

3. Michael Saylor, el flautista de Hamelín

Hemos definido el moonboyismo como una turba especulativa que se ha distanciado de los principios del libertarismo. Pero, ¿cómo es controlada? El moonboy, como polilla a la llama, busca un líder que le diga que su codicia es noble, ¿y qué mejor representante de este fenómeno que Michael Saylor, el flautista de Hamelín de los moonboys? En apenas unos años, Saylor ha secuestrado Bitcoin hasta el punto de convertirse en el líder de facto, a pesar de distanciarse vocalmente de la filosofía libertaria sobre la que se construyó la criptomoneda. En una entrevista el año pasado, Saylor declaró su creencia de que el concepto de Bitcoin como medio de intercambio está obsoleto y de que la custodia de Bitcoin debe quedar bajo el control de los exchanges centralizados, las mismas entidades conocidas por la recopilación de datos y los préstamos de reserva fraccionaria. Estas declaraciones escandalosas recibieron varios días de rechazo en Twitter, con muchos influencers del mundo cripto redactando cuidadosamente tuits que advertían sobre esta retórica. ¿El resultado? Saylor publicó un breve mensaje de disculpa, y todo fue perdonado. ¡Qué dulce es ser el rey! El flautista ha seducido a los moonboys con sueños de prosperidad económica; y maldecido sea el idealismo, porque ahora él tiene el gobierno de la mayoría.

En su página de Twitter, Saylor tiene fijado un tuit con su atroz poesía, el que habla de “avispas cibernéticas”; seguro que no puede dejar de mirarlo, como si fuera algo de lo que estar plenamente orgulloso. Asimismo, a menudo se pone poético en el escenario frente a miles de personas, hablando de Bitcoin como “energía digital”, escupiendo metáforas torpes en un intento por idealizar Bitcoin como una especie de religión. Sin embargo, la influencia de Saylor se extiende más allá de sus humildes siervos moonboy, llegando hasta los duques y duquesas regionales, quienes poseen relativa influencia en esta economía del engaño. Esto puede verse rutinariamente en las conferencias anuales de Bitcoin, pero recientemente se hizo aún más vergonzoso en la “Fiesta de Año Nuevo de los 100k” de Saylor. El evento, celebrado en su mansión, se redujo a un patético juego de roles de El gran Gatsby, con Saylor mostrando alegremente la lujosa finca a sus invitados adinerados. Para el moonboy, un tique dorado para asistir a esta fiesta sería sinónimo de “haberlo logrado”. Aspira a ser reconocido como un inversor astuto, más sabio que todos los demás tontos. Pero para el maximalista del mercado de la darknet, esto no es más que un resumen de lo podrido que se ha vuelto todo, un retrato de la desesperada fantasía que se desarrolla en las mentes de los moonboys: que algún día, ellos también estarán en la posición de Saylor, con miles de subordinados celosos del éxito de su inversión de gran cerebro.

Las contribuciones de Saylor a Bitcoin han consistido en redoblar y triplicar la miserable mentalidad de la cultura HODL, la cual predica que el único caso de uso de Bitcoin es comprar y aguantar como si la vida dependiera de ello. Lo único que le importa a Saylor es que sus seguidores acumulen Bitcoin y que vendan sus riñones si les falta liquidez. Esto crea una interesante paradoja: ¿cómo puede ser Bitcoin el futuro del dinero si nadie quiere usarlo realmente? Los defensores de la reserva de valor como caso de uso apuntan a la Ley de Gresham, argumentando que el dinero más “duro” será retirado de la circulación. Esto estaría bien si Bitcoin tuviera características de fungibilidad —no las tiene—, o si su modelo de seguridad no se basara en las tarifas de transacción —se basa en ellas—, o si no hubiera un continuo esfuerzo por centralizar el software que usan los bitcoiners. Los resultados de la mentalidad Saylor han sido el acaparamiento, los bloques vacíos, la promoción de soluciones no libres y la total dependencia de que el valor de Bitcoin suba. Uno puede esperar que, eventualmente, el culto a la personalidad que rodea a Saylor reciba su merecido, pero incluso si el castillo de naipes se derrumba, detrás de Saylor hay toda una corte dispuesta a ocupar su lugar; inevitablemente los moonboys elegirán a su próximo líder, porque es contrario a su naturaleza pensar por sí mismos.

El mundo de las criptomonedas lo dominan los moonboys, y el flautista Saylor es un reflejo de ello. El hecho de que Saylor no haya sido cubierto de brea y plumas por la comunidad de Bitcoin, sino exaltado y abrazado, es todo lo que necesitas saber sobre el estado actual de las cosas. Es curioso plantearse por qué a este fraude, con sus miles de millones de dólares, nunca se le pasó por la cabeza consolidar la defensa de Samourai Wallet o Tornado Cash con el mejor equipo legal que el dinero pueda comprar. Así mismo, ¿por qué no está encabezando una campaña de lobby en el Capitolio por la privacidad y la libertad para aquellos que usan criptomonedas como efectivo digital? ¿Por qué habla exclusivamente de comprar Bitcoin y no de ser una persona razonable que ocasionalmente pueda vender sus ganancias, o usar Bitcoin? Ya conoces la respuesta. Es porque no le importa Bitcoin, ni la libertad, ni ninguna de esas cosas. La estafa Saylor es un juego de las sillas donde los únicos ganadores son los que tienen la suerte de salir con la delantera. Ahora estamos en la mitad del juego que, por supuesto, está amañado para que él quede primero.

Me imagino que hay lectores que consideran mi tono elitista; no discrepo. Las criptomonedas en su conjunto necesitan crítica e introspección, especialmente por parte de quienes son firmes defensores del efectivo digital. Qué cansado es observar a la comunidad desde las esquinas, viendo a supuestos periodistas y podcasters luchar por la relevancia promocionando cualquier estafa cripto que les dé atención o dinero. Es aún peor ver al público seguir ciegamente al flautista Saylor, cuya encantadora melodía se aprovecha de las esperanzas y sueños del desesperado moonboy que aparentemente no tiene nada más que esperar de su vida. ¡Pero no confundas puntos de vista pretenciosos con la falta de voluntad para ayudar! Si estás sufriendo un episodio de moonboyismo, pero aún conservas una pizca de dignidad, poco a poco te irás inspirando a aprender y mejorar, y por el camino los expertos en privacidad estarán encantados de orientarte en la dirección correcta. Nunca antes ha habido tantos recursos para aprender sobre privacidad y cómo protegerte, y no hace falta decir que una de las mejores inversiones que puedes hacer para tu futuro es educarte sobre cómo luchar contra el Estado de vigilancia. Hazlo paso a paso, refuerza cada faceta de tu OPSEC y aprende a conocer al enemigo de arriba a abajo. Y, con el tiempo, te unirás a otros cypherpunks desengañados que se han convertido en maximalistas del mercado de la darknet, rascándote la cabeza con perplejidad mientras Saylor hace el ridículo una vez más ante su turba de seguidores.

4. La estafa de la adopción global

Lo que Saylor y compañía hacen para seducir al moonboy es alimentar su fantasía: un hipotético mundo que depende del activo escaso de Bitcoin, con afirmaciones de que el moonboy estará sentado en la ciudadela, protegido de los indignos nocoiners que deberán arrastrarse a sus pies para que les lance algunos satoshis de caridad. Esto nos lleva a lo que quizás sea la mayor mentira que promueven los influencers de las criptomonedas: la adopción global. Para muchos, este salto de fe se da por sentado. Es inevitable, seguro, que el dinero fíat fracase, que los dólares se vuelvan inservibles, que se pierda toda confianza y que se necesiten carretillas rebosantes de efectivo para comprar barras de pan. Seguro que debe ocurrir que, un día, la gente adopte unánimemente las criptomonedas como su fuente de ahorro e ingresos; que las élites parasitarias que han controlado nuestras economías durante cientos de años cederán su influencia política por el bien mayor; que todo el poderío de los Estados nación se desmoronará bajo el poder de Bitcoin, y que se arrodillarán para declarar que Satoshi es el Rey, y que todos nos tomaremos de las manos para cantar Kumbaya en una nueva era de paz.

Si crees esto, probablemente estás en una cámara de eco.

Como ya hemos visto, todo aspecto del efectivo digital peer-to-peer que lo convierte en un asalto a la fortaleza del Estado nación ha sido atacado, castrado e infiltrado. El dinero fíat no va a desaparecer en silencio, y el público general acepta y seguirá aceptando lo que el gobierno le diga que haga porque eso es lo seguro, y a la gente le gusta sentirse segura. Y así, la narrativa respaldada por el Estado respecto a Bitcoin es que es un activo digital, no una forma de efectivo peer-to-peer. El foco se pone en Michael Saylor y la senadora Lummis, quienes dan patéticos discursos en la CNBC con su interés firmemente puesto en la futura colaboración con el sistema financiero tradicional. La turba moonboy continua este circo porque el número sigue subiendo, y mientras tanto, los medios insinúan que el medio de intercambio como caso de uso es una reliquia de los torpes orígenes cypherpunk. Cualquier atisbo de la contracultura que supone una afrenta a la banca se minimiza y se difama como delitos contra la legislación Anti Lavado de Dinero. En una palabra, su futuro idealizado del efectivo peer-to-peer es una forma alternativa de Venmo: censurable, controlable, cumplimentario.

Que la adopción mundial de las criptomonedas sea hipotéticamente posible o probable no es la cuestión. Lo que debe entenderse es que, en el momento de escribir esto, la adopción global es un caballo de Troya que oculta la centralización y el espionaje, y cualquiera que abogue por ella está irónicamente argumentando a favor de la expansión del sistema financiero tradicional. ¿Cómo lo sabemos? Porque las soluciones que proponen los portavoces de las criptomonedas no se usan en los mercados de la darknet. Como maximalistas del mercado de la darknet, usamos este simple barómetro para eliminar la discusión técnica innecesaria y la aparentemente interminable cantidad de protocolos cripto que confunden y abruman al recién llegado y, en su lugar, destacar el hecho de que los mercados de la darknet representan la contracultura dentro de las criptomonedas que aún se resiste a las finanzas tradicionales. Y, como era de esperar, la gente que depende del efectivo peer-to-peer aguerrido no está usando aplicaciones de capa dos de Bitcoin. De hecho, te acusarían de ser un agente de la ley por siquiera sugerirlo.

Para ser claros, la adopción del efectivo peer-to-peer entre el público general es extremadamente difícil, y los intentos de tender un puente entre el usuario de Linux treintañero y la abuela de setenta son alucinantes. Pero con este nivel de experiencia de usuario amigable viene el inevitable blanqueamiento de los principios del software libre y de código abierto, y lo que es peor, un abandono del criptoanarquismo político, el que otorga al efectivo peer-to-peer su vitalidad. El maximalista del mercado de la darknet aboga por el realismo y los pequeños pasos hacia una mayor adopción, en lugar de soñar despierto con el futuro. Esto es aburrido y gradual, pero es racional y sensato. En lugar de distraernos con las subidas o bajadas mensuales del valor de una criptomoneda, debemos destacar la importancia de expandir economías paralelas para esa criptomoneda. En lugar de entrar en pánico por la última regulación gubernamental, debemos redoblar nuestras creencias y contraatacar tanto en los tribunales como a través de nuestro uso peer-to-peer. En lugar de buscar atraer gente con promesas de coches deportivos, debemos reunir a tantos aliados de la defensa de la privacidad como sea posible, siempre que compartan nuestra perspectiva sobre la importancia del software libre de código abierto. El enfoque debe estar en asentar una base sobre la que las generaciones futuras puedan construir ladrillo a ladrillo, y aunque pueda haber algo de ganancias y un aumento del interés público por el camino, eso nunca debe interponerse al idealismo.

Desprenderse de la idea de la adopción global es el paso más importante que puede dar un moonboy en recuperación. Muestra una maduración en su visión del mundo, un crecimiento de la disciplina y una comprensión del juego de ajedrez que se libra entre el Estado y nuestra libertad. Si aún estás atrapado en la mentalidad de que las criptomonedas dominarán el mundo, aún no lo has entendido, porque las finanzas tradicionales, una de las herramientas más efectivas del Estado, han absorbido las criptomonedas dentro de su sistema demoníaco. El Estado no perderá esta batalla a corto plazo, así que ajusta tus plazos y no te confíes, porque lo que hemos presenciado solo en la última década es el desmantelamiento de lo que una vez fue el poderoso y aterrador Bitcoin. Como maximalistas del mercado de la darknet, valoramos la utilidad, porque la utilidad es lo que garantiza la adopción, y cualquier tipo de adopción ahora es mejor que una adopción hipotética en el futuro. Y es por eso que estudiamos los mercados de la darknet, porque actualmente representan la economía peer-to-peer más antigua y grande, activa y vibrante, que depende enteramente de las criptomonedas.

5. Hacer las criptomonedas espeluznantes de nuevo

A los recién llegados les costará creerlo, pero hubo un tiempo en que las criptomonedas eran un tema aterrador. Bitcoin, en particular, tenía una asociación directa con la actividad criminal, y para muchos de nosotros así fue como entramos en contacto con ellas, ya fuera por los rumores sobre Silk Road o por los alarmistas artículos de opinión en los periódicos acerca de un misterioso dinero de internet usado por narcotraficantes. En los primeros días no había regulaciones, por lo que la conversación giraba en torno a cómo Bitcoin sería prohibido y cómo la narcoeconomía subterránea que lo usaba conduciría a arrestos masivos y, eventualmente, a la confiscación de criptomonedas a ciudadanos que siguiesen la ley. Bitcoin, especialmente en sus inicios, era un campo de juego para cypherpunks dedicados al avance del efectivo peer-to-peer. Su tolerancia a la cultura HODL se debía en gran parte a la enorme incertidumbre financiera que rodeaba al proyecto. Una vez que el número subió, más de lo que nadie podría haber imaginado, el idealismo fue reemplazado, y esos cypherpunks fueron sometidos a la docilidad o excomulgados del proyecto que ayudaron a construir. Lo que queda ahora es una colección de miembros del Core que simpatiza con el erróneo mito de la adopción global e incluso lo alienta. Los cypherpunks iluminados, curtidos hasta convertirse en maximalistas del mercado de la darknet, sienten vergüenza e ira por la creación de este monstruo. La codicia ha ganado, y bandidos como Saylor han ascendido a la cima.

Bitcoin hoy ha alcanzado el atractivo para el mainstream sin ninguna semblanza con sus orígenes. Muchas celebridades, ejecutivos de empresas y políticos defienden hoy a Bitcoin, algo que, hace diez años, habría sido un suicidio profesional. Pero, ¿qué ha ganado Bitcoin con esta aceptación mayoritaria? El moonboy señalará la gráfica del precio, los ETFs y los avales de las celebridades antes mencionadas. Pero los cypherpunks saben que todo esto son trucos de ilusionista. Lo que realmente ocurrió fue lo siguiente: la expansión dramática de la legislación Conoce a tu Cliente/Lucha contra el Lavado de Dinero [KYC/AML], el desarrollo tecnológico de la vigilancia blockchain, la avalancha de batallas legales destinadas a quitarnos derechos y el lobby incesante que está ocurriendo ahora mismo en el Capitolio. Con el tiempo, el Estado se dio cuenta de que Bitcoin y otras criptomonedas son relativamente inofensivas sin privacidad en la capa base, y en lugar de optar por una confrontación directa, decidió que bastaba con cocer la rana a fuego lento, recortando a los grupos marginales de resistencia hasta conseguir lo que quería. Y su estrategia de juego ha funcionado. La conversión de Bitcoin de efectivo peer-to-peer a una acción de una empresa tecnológica cualquiera se ha realizado plenamente, y los valores cypherpunk que nos trajeron hasta aquí han sido blanqueados.

Pero hay una ironía en la transición de Bitcoin hacia un activo digital estéril y apto para corporaciones: que ha perdido todo su aura en el proceso. Considera el estatus rebelde y aterrador que Bitcoin tenía en los primeros días de Silk Road y contrástalo con el retrato de Michael Saylor en la portada de la revista Forbes. Todo el filo, todo el poder, todo lo que hacía que las criptomonedas fueran únicas como amenaza al sistema financiero tradicional se ha ido, habiendo relegado a Bitcoin a una débil caricatura de lo que una vez fue. La crisis de identidad en la que se encuentra Bitcoin es una idea secundaria para el moonboy, que considera este desarrollo una progresión natural, análoga a cómo internet, otrora un salvaje oeste descentralizado de sitios web, ahora se canaliza en unas pocas redes sociales políticamente correctas. Ven el cambio de Bitcoin como positivo, creyendo la idea de que un camino más sencillo pero aprobado por el Estado sirve al bien mayor de la humanidad. O, al menos, esto es de lo que se han convencido a sí mismos, ya que cualquier maximalista del mercado de la darknet que mire el panorama general se apresurará a señalar lo siguiente: restarle importancia a la lucha contra el Estado acarrea serios problemas. Sin duda esto los ha llevado a insistir en la reserva de valor como principal caso de uso, en oposición a continuar centrándose en el medio de intercambio.

La buena noticia es que el mercado libre es implacable y encontrará un camino. Los mercados de la darknet, y por extensión, el uso de efectivo peer-to-peer en desafío a las regulaciones, siempre existirán. Y así, ante la ausencia de mejoras en Bitcoin, los mercados de la darknet han buscado en otra parte. El bien documentado aumento de la popularidad de Monero en los mercados de la darknet satisface la necesidad de efectivo digital donde Bitcoin ya no es suficientemente bueno, y, del mismo modo, ahora es Monero el que es atacado mediante regulaciones, miedo e incertidumbre. Por supuesto, el moonboy señala el escaso rendimiento relativo del precio de Monero como resultado, pero el maximalista del mercado de la darknet ve estas eliminaciones del registro como una prueba conceptual y un aval por parte de las empresas de análisis de cadena hacia un medio de intercambio superior. Si Bitcoin, amigable con la regulación, fuera visto como imponente, poderoso y, en última instancia, como amenaza para el Estado, también sería eliminado de los exchanges. Entonces, ¿por qué no está sucediendo eso? ¿Por qué Monero asusta a los exchanges y Bitcoin no? ¿Qué lo hace aún más poderoso? Lentamente, el aura y la influencia en torno a Monero crecen, con el miedo y la incertidumbre que lo rodean actuando como una sutil promoción que demuestra cuán poderoso es el efectivo peer-to-peer desde la perspectiva de los poderes establecidos.

Hay algo sobre la actual cultura de las criptomonedas que exuda cualquier cosa menos autenticidad. La cultura, si se le puede llamar así, es una mezcla de estafas del tercer mundo, memes y apuestas degeneradas. Nada de ello es serio. Mucha gente comparte esta opinión, y los moonboys disfrutan de este insulto con matices de ironía, viéndolo como una medalla de honor y regodeándose en el mundo payaso en lugar de desafiarlo. Pero hay algo en las criptomonedas que se toma en serio debido a lo formidable que es: el uso del efectivo peer-to-peer en los mercados de la darknet. Como el respeto que recibiría Tony Soprano al entrar en un restaurante, los moonboys e incluso los nocoiners cripto-aversos, quienes se burlan de cualquier cosa tangencialmente relacionada con las criptomonedas, inclinan la cabeza en reconocimiento. Innatamente, todo el mundo reconoce el poder que el dinero digital puede tener sobre los Estados nación. El hecho de que un incontrolable proyecto de código abierto esté siendo utilizado por entidades criminales en todo el mundo evidencia ese dominio implícito. Pero este hecho a menudo se minimiza, se oscurece y se mira con desaprobación. La opinión mayoritaria dentro de las criptomonedas argumenta que estas son mucho más que su adopción temprana en la darknet, por lo que el hecho debería ignorarse, pero el hombre algo más sabio ve este hecho como un indicador, una utilización que señala algo que repele al Estado. Por mucho que intenten eliminar el estigma que conlleva la adopción en la darknet, este persigue a las criptomonedas como un recordatorio de lo que está en juego, y este hecho no se le escapa al maximalista del mercado de la darknet.

6. El misil táctico nuclear para cortocircuitar al moonboy de Bitcoin

A pesar del considerable prestigio obtenido por el uso en la darknet, el moonboy saltará ante la oportunidad de restar importancia a cualquier asociación con la actividad criminal. Comentará que la economía subterránea de las drogas es comparativamente minúscula, que la capitalización de mercado de Bitcoin la eclipsa y que es mejor no tener esa reputación manchada ante los ojos de la población cumplidora de la ley. Pero lo que es peor, cuando se lo confronta con la disminución de la adopción de Bitcoin en estos mercados de la darknet, a menudo insultará a un proyecto reputado como Monero llamándolo shitcoin, tildando a esta alternativa de efectivo digital —que le ha arrebatado cuota de mercado en la darknet a Bitcoin— de una mera distracción de la riqueza generacional. Así que ahora me gustaría ofrecerte mi método patentado para avergonzar a este moonboy de Bitcoin que ha perdido de vista el panorama general. Es un pequeño truco que he aprendido y que, hasta la fecha, ha funcionado el 100% de las veces. Solo tienes que decir lo siguiente:

«Si Monero es un shitcoin, ¿cómo es que ha superado a Bitcoin como la criptomoneda más usada en los mercados de la darknet? Porque a pesar de la enorme ventaja de Bitcoin en efecto de red y liquidez, Monero se ha convertido en la criptomoneda más usada en la economía peer-to-peer más antigua y grande, que depende del efectivo peer-to-peer».

La razón por la que esta afirmación es tan efectiva es que la gente en los mercados de la darknet no usa criptomonedas peer-to-peer porque quiera, sino porque necesita hacerlo. No tienen otra opción. Si pudieras hacer desaparecer las criptomonedas por arte de magia, estos mercados peer-to-peer dejarían de existir en gran medida porque no tendrían otra forma sencilla de transferir valor. Además, los usuarios de estos mercados de la darknet no tienen la fijación tribalista del “que-suba-el-número” que plaga a las criptomonedas. No se levantan, saltan de la cama, abren la ventana y le gritan al mundo su amor por el efectivo digital. No presumen ante sus amigos de cuánto tienen en criptomonedas. No, compran efectivo digital como si fuera gasolina para su coche. Es una necesidad. Y en este entorno ilícito que, ojo, es increíblemente peligroso —ya que requiere la utilidad de transferir valor que sea la más fuerte y aguerrida— han optado por usar el pequeño Monero en lugar del tan potente Bitcoin.

El problema para el moonboy es que esta pregunta se formula en torno a la utilidad, no al precio. El moonboy, que solo piensa en el precio, se ve ahora obligado a imaginar un escenario basado en la dependencia. En respuesta a la afirmación anterior, el moonboy está entrenado para mostrar un gráfico del precio de Monero y cómo ha tenido un rendimiento inferior en relación con Bitcoin. Pero lo que el moonboy no capta es que esto lo hace aún más impresionante, porque a pesar de la falta de apreciación del precio de Monero, este ha superado al muy líquido Bitcoin en un mercado donde la vida de las personas depende de un efectivo digital incensurable. ¿Por qué no están usando Bitcoin en su lugar? ¿Cómo superó Monero este efecto de red tan sustancial? ¿No saben que Monero es “mucho menos seguro” que Bitcoin? ¿Por qué usan un shitcoin en lugar de la Lightning Network? La cabeza del moonboy empieza a dar vueltas. Este “misil táctico” y sus muchas variaciones erradican la crítica que el moonboy hace contra Monero. Esto no se basa en la especulación; es una visión no sesgada del mercado libre, y está ocurriendo ahora mismo.

Lo que el moonboy de Bitcoin no admitirá es que esto es, en cierto modo, castrante. Acostumbrado a convencer a los demás de que no hay un segundo mejor, ahora debe enfrentarse a la preferencia por Monero de parte de criminales curtidos. Esto se agrava porque carece del conocimiento técnico para debatir con el cypherpunk, y porque a menudo tiene demasiado miedo de investigar por sí mismo y leer en un servicio oculto como Dread para confirmar esta realidad. Esta situación imposible de ganar hace que huya de vuelta a su cámara de eco o que acepte que quizás haya otros proyectos que valga la pena conocer. Y no es solo Bitcoin; cualquer proyecto que critique la privacidad de Monero deberá superar el hecho de que fue Monero el que se eligió, y no el suyo. Este hecho insuperable se debe a muchos factores, que examinaremos con más detalle más adelante, y da crédito a nuestro adagio de que la criptomoneda elegida en los mercados de la darknet es la que en última instancia vale la pena estudiar.

Cabe señalar que nuestro estudio de los mercados negros de internet se centra principalmente en los mercados de drogas, que pueden ser encontrados por aquellos lo suficientemente curiosos como para buscar en Tor. La verdadera economía de la darknet es difícil de definir y abarca mucho más que los mercados de drogas, como estafas, ransomware y armas, entre otros bienes y servicios ilícitos. Por ejemplo, se podría argumentar que las stablecoins, una perversión de las criptomonedas que fija digitalmente un activo al dinero fíat, se usan en mayor volumen que Monero o Bitcoin, debido en gran parte a su falta de volatilidad y su fuerte liquidez. Otros pueden señalar que hay una cantidad significativa de comercio ilegal en plataformas de redes sociales como Instagram o a través de protocolos de chat como Telegram. Por supuesto, el dinero fíat en general eclipsa el uso de criptomonedas, así que no sorprende leer artículos sobre la adopción de stablecoins por parte de carteles mexicanos y sindicatos del crimen chinos, o sobre la bien documentada adopción en el tercer mundo por defensores de las cripto que quieren preservar su valor con el dólar. Sin embargo, no se conocen estimaciones reputadas y precisas, por lo que es más sensato centrarse en los mercados “tradicionales” con un OPSEC elevado a los que accede el ciudadano común; es decir: los mercados que se encuentran en agregadores de servicios ocultos como Tor Taxi, ya que son más relevantes en cuanto a cómo el efectivo peer-to-peer se desarrolló hasta lo que es hoy. Además, la futura legislación sobre stablecoins y las restricciones a los proveedores de redes sociales empujarán de hecho a los criminales hacia tipos de criptomonedas más curtidas, y probablemente hacia aquella con una reputación probada en esos mercados de drogas de la darknet.

Para ser claros, este manifiesto no es un discurso de venta de Monero. El maximalista del mercado de la darknet no tiene lealtad alguna a un proyecto de criptomonedas, pues no aborda las criptomonedas como un medio de ganancia financiera. El maximalista del mercado de la darknet respalda a Monero, pero también señala que la liquidez y la naturaleza transparente de Bitcoin son compromisos importantes y que, a pesar de la castración de Bitcoin en la última década, aún se usa en los mercados de la darknet, sigue prevaleciendo en las demandas de ransomware y sigue siendo una rampa de acceso líquida con una cultura cypherpunk, pequeña pero apasionada, con la que bien vale la pena fraternizar. De hecho, el maximalista del mercado de la darknet se apresuraría a señalar la ironía de una creciente retórica maximalista sobre Monero que, a la inversa del moonboy de Bitcoin, promociona las posibles “ganancias asombrosas” que podrían obtenerse de un proyecto que sigue los orígenes cypherpunk de Bitcoin como la criptomoneda elegida en la darknet. El maximalista de Monero en muchos aspectos usa las mismas tácticas fraudulentas que el maximalista de Bitcoin para lograr su sueño de prosperidad financiera, mirando los mercados ilícitos como un indicador y abrazando el estigma como una herramienta de propaganda. En efecto, el poder de la adopción del mercado libre, especialmente cuando se yuxtapone con la característica de la utilidad frente a la especulación del “que-suba-el-número”, es un poderoso concepto que proporciona una prueba de valor incluso a los individuos más ignorantes; de hecho, este manifiesto se basa en eso. Pero el que idealiza el estigma asociado a los mercados de la darknet con el objetivo de hacerse rico no es mejor que el maximalista degenerado que venera a Michael Saylor. Esa idea se basa en la subida del valor en fíat y, dejándola campar a sus anchas, nos llevará de vuelta a la situación en la que nos encontramos hoy con Bitcoin.

7. Joe el mecánico

Es una verdad innegable que el uso en los mercados de la darknet es una forma sencilla de probar que una criptomoneda peer-to-peer funciona. Incluso los normies que no tienen un caballo en esta carrera levantan las cejas al ver que las fuerzas del orden puedan hacer poco para prevenir las transacciones de efectivo digital. Sin embargo, hay una dinámica interesante que debemos destacar: a los usuarios de los mercados de la darknet no les importa particularmente el precio de las criptomonedas, ni siquiera la tecnología subyacente. Fuera de algunas molestias menores por la volatilidad del precio a corto plazo, para el usuario de la darknet su interés en algo como Monero o Bitcoin se basa estrictamente en satisfacer un paso de la lista para adquirir algo. Tienen poca comprensión sobre los compromisos de diferentes proyectos y no están expuestos al meta o a los debates en lugares como crypto Twitter. Puede parecer una tontería pasar tiempo pensando en este grupo demográfico de agnósticos, pero cualquier investigador de los mercados de la darknet señalaría que, en realidad, representan la mayor parte de la economía de criptomonedas que depende del uso del efectivo peer-to-peer y no de la especulación.

Si cerramos los ojos e imaginamos un artículo de noticias sobre la dark web, podemos ver la imagen que eligen para ilustrar la historia: es la de un hombre con una sudadera encapuchada sobre su rostro, quizás usando una máscara de Guy Fawkes, tecleando en la interfaz de línea de comandos de un portátil. Para mucha gente, los servicios ocultos son un concepto completamente ajeno que solo los usuarios experimentados en la informática pueden alcanzar. Pero la verdad es que la mayoría de los usuarios de la darknet son personas normales que no tienen ni idea de lo que están haciendo, a menudo con una experiencia informática que se reduce a publicar en Reddit y saber cómo abrir el administrador de tareas de Windows. Para ilustrar este asunto, imaginemos una situación con un tipo promedio llamado Joe. Es un mecánico al que le gusta jugar a videojuegos. Joe trabaja largos turnos y, para sobrellevar su existencia, como muchos otros veinte o treintañeros, decide consumir algunas sustancias ilegales. Le da aprensión encontrar un narcotraficante, pero después de enterarse por un amigo de que esto es posible por internet, decide intentarlo. ¿Cómo procedería?

Joe el mecánico no va a pasar docenas de horas leyendo white papers sobre diferentes tipos de criptomonedas, ni va a sumergirse en los debates entre distintos proyectos. Joe no tiene ni idea de cómo funciona esto y se va irritando cada vez más con la sobrecarga de información que le llega cuando comienza su investigación. Él solo quiere algo que esté probado que funcione, así que cuando visita los sitios de la darknet, aprende posteriormente que Monero y Bitcoin son criptomonedas adoptadas, y esa es toda la información que desea. Sigue al rebaño. A partir de ahí, encontrará una guía en internet sobre cómo adquirir criptomonedas, y seguirá ese consejo paso a paso. Como Joe busca el camino más sencillo, felizmente usará un exchange centralizado, utilizará una wallet con un intercambio de monedas integrado y no considerará los vectores de ataque latentes que pueden ser explotados por empresas de análisis de cadena. A decir verdad, Joe en ningún momento cuestiona nada ni lee más información de la que necesita para ir del punto A al punto B. El pequeño secreto de la darknet es que muchos de sus usuarios son como Joe, al menos al principio. Comienzan su viaje como profanos desinformados y siguen las instrucciones de otros Joes que han llegado más lejos que ellos.

Esto no quiere decir que las acciones de Joe el mecánico estén mal encaminadas; ¡no lo están! Yo diría que Joe está siendo extremadamente racional al reconocer que está fuera de su elemento, por lo que lógicamente elegirá las herramientas seleccionadas por el mercado libre, como Monero, Tor y PGP. Asimismo, confiará en guías útiles publicadas por otras personas que han resuelto el proceso, y con el tiempo se establecerá una refinada receta para ir del punto A al punto B. Ahora puedes estar preguntándote: si Joe el mecánico sigue el camino más sencillo, ¿no usará simplemente Bitcoin dada la mayor dificultad que puede tener para adquirir Monero? Y sí, es cierto que hay mercados que aún aceptan Bitcoin, por lo que Joe puede perfectamente llegar a la conclusión de que bien podría usar Bitcoin. Sin embargo, cuanto más tiempo lleve Monero siendo adoptado con éxito, más se desaprueba el comportamiento de no usarlo, e inevitablemente llegamos a un punto donde incluso Joe se pregunta por qué la gente usa Bitcoin en lugar de Monero. Esto ya se ve hoy con el mayor mercado de drogas de la darknet, Archetyp Market. Siendo una plataforma peer-to-peer donde exclusivamente se usa Monero, podemos estar seguros de que muchos Joes mecánicos la usan activamente.

El problema del huevo y la gallina al que se enfrenta la criptomoneda peer-to-peer es que para tener adopción en la darknet, necesitas adopción en la darknet. Esta paradoja se supera con un movimiento orgánico, apasionado y dedicado que ha construido confianza y reputación a lo largo del tiempo. Se necesita una promoción exhaustiva por parte de individuos que no temen ir a las áreas que no son políticamente correctas, ni amigables con la regulación, ya que esas son exactamente las áreas que tienen un uso para el efectivo peer-to-peer. Y como señala el maximalista del mercado de la darknet, el uso del efectivo peer-to-peer en estas áreas sórdidas de internet refleja el propósito más grande del efectivo peer-to-peer, que más tarde puede aplicarse de muchas maneras beneficiosas para el ciudadano común contra el Estado. Curiosamente, la utilización de Monero por parte de Joe es una inconveniencia mensual, y si fuera por él, usaría PayPal o incluso su tarjeta de crédito para comprar drogas por internet. Así es como se consuma la ironía definitiva: los impulsores más importantes de usar efectivo peer-to-peer son a menudo novatos en lo técnico que apenas entienden por qué están usando criptomonedas en primer lugar. En última instancia, esto ejemplifica la importancia de integrar la privacidad por defecto en un proyecto de criptomonedas; más aún, da a entender que invertir tiempo en estudiar el comportamiento de los humildes usuarios de drogas es beneficioso para el desarrollo del mismo. El uso por parte de Joe el mecánico es el combustible que impulsa el efectivo peer-to-peer hacia adelante, y el maximalista del mercado de la darknet lo reconoce; no sermonea al individuo por perderse la riqueza generacional, sino que encuentra en este uso un indicio de cómo el Estado puede ser superado por gente como Joe, lo sepan o no.

8. Oda a Ross Ulbricht

La economía de la darknet es un mercado libre cifrado de personas de todas las clases económicos y sociales. Hay mecánicos y finance bros, profesores y vendedores, energúmenos y yonquis. Son gente que, sin saberlo, vemos a diario en persona, pero sus identidades en línea son anónimas, protegiendo así un comportamiento que desafía la ley y es condenado como inmoral. Sin duda, algunos son malvados, pero muchos son miembros normales y funcionales de la sociedad que nos ayudarían en momentos de necesidad. Y aunque este mercado subterráneo pueda estar oculto en las sombras, indescifrable para cualquiera que intente asomarse a verlo, todavía hay algo de luz que, inexplicablemente, puede abrirse paso e iluminar el futuro.

Y así, el otro día se tomó una foto de un hombre con un chándal gris, una bolsa al hombro, una planta en una maceta y una sonrisa conmovedora. Qué dulce fue. La euforia compartida de toda la comunidad cypherpunk no sucede a menudo, pero puedo asegurarte que esta imagen, aparentemente tomada al azar, envió una oleada de júbilo por todo el mundo, tal como las comunicaciones cifradas navegan por nuestras redes peer-to-peer. Para los menos informados, Ross Ulbricht puede parecer un degenerado que causó la creación de la economía que hoy llamamos darknet. Pero para los reales, Dread Pirate Roberts fue un visionario que vio cómo el efectivo digital podría cambiar el mundo.

En el lore de las criptomonedas, la Silk Road es el mítico lugar de nacimiento de Bitcoin. Según la leyenda, en algún oscuro rincón de internet, un proyecto de hobby de un friki se transformó en una amenaza inimaginable. Corrieron rumores sobre una web como Ebay donde se vendían drogas. Un amigo de un amigo afirmó haber comprado cocaína allí, y lo juraba. Sonaba demasiado bien para ser verdad. Pero con el tiempo, la conciencia pública fue tomando nota de lo que parecía un concepto imposible. Y antes de que te dieras cuenta, Bitcoin había entrado en el mainstream como un contrapeso revolucionario a las finanzas tradicionales. Aterraba a los indecisos, que no pueden formar opiniones propias. Aterraba a los gobiernos, que hacen todo lo posible por aplastarnos como a insectos. Aterraba al sindicato bancario, que nos ha tenido secuestrados durante generaciones. Fue absolutamente increíble.

Aquí, sin embargo, debemos detenernos para separar a Dread Pirate Roberts, la figura metafórica de la contracultura, de Ross, el ser humano. El desgarrador detalle que muchos no entienden es que, por su propia admisión, Ross siente un gran remordimiento por haber creado Silk Road. En su única entrevista pública, en la conferencia de Bitcoin de 2021, a través de sus palabras cuidadosamente escogidas podías imaginar las lágrimas acumulándose en sus ojos. Es una confesión brutalmente sincera y, enfrentándose a una cadena perpetua, se nota que estaba totalmente desesperado, lleno de remordimiento, anhelando libertad. Se refirió a su yo de 26 años como impulsivo, lo cual contrasta con ese vivaz símbolo antigobierno en el que muchos lo quieren pintar. Escuchar a esa brillante alma libertaria, alguien bastante parecido a mí, tan quebrado por el confinamiento de la prisión federal, me hizo darme cuenta de que Ross no era simplemente un idealista con sueños de derrocar las finanzas tradicionales, sino también un programador joven e ingenuo que resultó ser el primero en encender la cerilla.

Si Ross no hubiera creado Silk Road, habría sido inevitable que otra persona hiciera el mismo descubrimiento. En retrospectiva, no hace falta un genio para darse cuenta de que el dinero incensurable puede usarse para transacciones ilícitas, y los criminales tienden a volverse innovadores cuando una nueva tecnología se introduce al público general. Además, los mercados ilícitos en internet existían desde mucho antes de Silk Road. Claro, se volvieron mucho más grandes tras la implementación del efectivo digital, pero eso solo demuestra aún más que esta pujante economía de la darknet iba a darse de todos modos. Y aunque los críticos señalan a Silk Road como una mancha fea en la historia de Bitcoin, hay que decir que las cosas que han empeorado a Bitcoin van mucho más allá de los mercados de la darknet. La verdadera libertad del efectivo peer-to-peer fue puesta en riesgo por la codicia y un sindicato de buitres ávidos de enriquecerse; en contraste, la Silk Road nos enseñó que las redes peer-to-peer unidas pueden ser imparables incluso en una distopía de la vigilancia.

El efectivo peer-to-peer nunca desaparecerá. Ahora existirá para siempre. Lo hemos encontrado, lo hemos descubierto y ahora lo estamos cosechando. Durante las próximas décadas seguiremos innovando, seguiremos adaptándonos y seguiremos protestando, y por favor, debes saber que casi todo será para el bien de la humanidad. Así que, dirigiéndome a ti, Ross, entiende que aunque puedas sentir remordimiento por lo que hiciste, tu contribución no es algo de lo que debas avergonzarte, y nos alegra que por fin estés en casa.

9. Breve historia del uso de criptomonedas en los mercados de la darknet

Pronto hubo docenas de sitios onion imitadores que buscaban alcanzar la infamia lograda por Dread Pirate Roberts. La adopción de Bitcoin prosperaba, las fuerzas del orden se adaptaron y así vio sus orígenes el juego del gato y el ratón de las criptomonedas. El campo de batalla era el libro de contabilidad público, y los investigadores federales comenzaron a atacarlo con éxito mediante herramientas de análisis probabilístico, capaces de vincular identidades con direcciones de wallet expuestas en exchanges centralizados. Empezaron a haber arrestos, y en respuesta la comunidad cypherpunk vio una demanda para el desarrollo de mixers y protocolos coinjoin que eliminaran los vínculos determinísticos. Algunos proyectos tuvieron éxito, pero la mayoría fracasó. La formidable liquidez y el efecto de red de Bitcoin mantuvieron tercamente sus altas tasas de adopción, pero con el tiempo este comenzó a quebrantarse aún más, por un impulso concentrado de acciones regulatorias que expandieron la legislación Conoce a tu Cliente y Anti Lavado de Dinero. Desde la perspectiva de Joe el mecánico, el proceso de adquirir Bitcoin en exchanges no centralizados se volvió una lata, y las técnicas para usarlo se hicieron más enrevesadas.

Históricamente, hubo varios mercados que incorporaron criptomonedas alternativas, aunque su uso era mínimo comparado con la adopción dominante de Bitcoin. Pero a medida que los arrestos se acumulaban, los administradores y vendedores de los mercados comenzaron a cambiar de opinión, y en 2019, con la creación de White House Market, Monero entró oficialmente en la economía de la darknet como una potencia. A diferencia de otros mercados, White House Market exigía PGP obligatorio y promovía Monero intensamente. Bitcoin, todavía aceptado en las primeras etapas de White House Market, fue finalmente descartado por completo. Al principio, a los usuarios de la darknet no les gustaba lo difícil que era usar White House, pero su énfasis en un OPSEC más fuerte generó un culto de seguidores, quienes finalmente lo convirtieron en el mercado de la darknet más grande del mundo.

El efecto bola de nieve fue gradual pero orgánico. Los vendedores de la darknet, los individuos que venden bienes ilícitos, suelen usar múltiples mercados para aumentar su clientela, así que, naturalmente, usaban Monero si operaban en White House Market. Esto hizo que respaldaran añadir Monero a otros mercados, y uno a uno, otros mercados comenzaron a hacer precisamente eso. Pronto se lanzaron otros mercados exclusivos de Monero, como Alphabay 2 y Archetyp Market. El período de transición del dominio de Bitcoin al de Monero ha tenido lugar en los últimos 5 años, comenzando a fines de 2019. Hoy, la mayoría de los mercados usan exclusivamente Monero y, probablemente, en los próximos años el uso de Bitcoin en estos mercados será completamente erradicado. Monero es ahora el rey de los mercados de la darknet y, por extensión, el rey del efectivo peer-to-peer.

Monero cubre todas las bases que un sucesor de Bitcoin debería ejemplificar. Su cultura es orgánica, de código abierto y dirigida por la comunidad. Como Bitcoin, no tiene dev tax ni pre-minado, lo que minimiza el riesgo de que el proyecto se desvíe por regulaciones o porque los desarrolladores sean atacados. Su protocolo de minería es de primera categoría, adoptando Random X para disuadir el monopolio de la minería ASIC que ha plagado a Bitcoin, devolviendo así el poder minero al usuario con un algoritmo optimizado para CPU. La extensa red de mineros, así como la base de usuarios con mayor conocimiento técnico, promueven Linux y el software libre. Su equipo de investigación ha sido galardonado por varias contribuciones influyentes al ecosistema y sus desarrolladores han demostrado ser capaces de aplicar parches a tiempo para frustrar a los malos participantes. Los bloques son dinámicos en tamaño y las tarifas son bajas. Y quizás lo más atractivo para alguien que no es técnicamente entendido, como Joe el mecánico, es la privacidad integrada por defecto en Monero, que pondrá incluso al usuario más torpe a un nivel igual, si no superior, al de un usuario de Bitcoin bien instruido.

Pero por encima de todo, lo que impulsa a una criptomoneda peer-to-peer es la pasión implacable del anarquismo cypherpunk que emana de su cuerpo de usuarios. La cultura debe ser escéptica, desconfiada de las regulaciones y vocalmente contraria al Estado. Debe promover el uso, no el acaparamiento. Debe trazar una línea roja en la arena por los derechos de privacidad que no será traspasada. El vigor que surge de defender algo en lo que crees ayuda a impulsar el proyecto, ya sea en su desarrollo técnico o en su promoción orgánica a individuos no familiarizados con él. En última instancia, es la filosofía del proyecto lo que garantizará su influencia a largo plazo, y con demasiada frecuencia este hecho se le escapa a la gente. Cuántas veces escucho al entusiasta de las criptomonedas bienintencionado que desea distanciarse del moonboyismo decir que está en las criptomonedas “por la tecnología”. Esta mentalidad es un paso en la dirección correcta, pero sin sentido. Enfocarse en la criptografía subyacente, la programación y las innovaciones en las blockchains puede ser gratificante para un académico, pero le falta empuje. Desde la perspectiva del maximalista del mercado de la darknet, este es un espectáculo secundario sin sentido. Esto se debe a que, en última instancia, la tecnología, aunque importante, juega un papel secundario frente al alma. Y para el efectivo peer-to-peer, esa alma se encuentra en su criptoanarquismo. Sin esa pasión por la lucha contra el Estado, el proyecto carece de valor a fin de cuentas, incluso con el respaldo del capital riesgo y el aval de celebridades. El efectivo peer-to-peer es una oportunidad para que el cypherpunk cambie por completo el mundo financiero, y un proyecto que no lucha contra nada no merece apoyo, porque significaría que ese proyecto está incrustado en el sistema financiero tradicional contra el que hay que luchar.

10. La etapa de construcción de influencia y la inevitabilidad del moonboyismo

Monero se encuentra actualmente en la etapa de construcción de influencia, el período en que una criptomoneda peer-to-peer experimenta una adopción próspera en los mercados de la darknet, el tipo de uso que hace que incluso el más patético de los maximalistas de ojos láser preste atención. El respeto otorgado a Monero no se basa en su precio, sino en el uso legítimo que continúa demostrando. Cada día, personas a las que no les importan las criptomonedas comienzan a usar Monero porque no tienen otra opción. Y a medida que más gente conoce este efectivo peer-to-peer de vanguardia, se usa más en todos los mercados de la clearnet y, como una corriente de agua implacable, la adopción en la darknet proporciona una demanda constante que fluye hacia todo lo demás. Basta con mirar cualquier negocio de la clearnet que publique datos de transacciones o preguntar a cualquier defensor de la privacidad sobre sus criptomonedas preferidas. Está claro que Monero es el estándar del efectivo peer-to-peer, la única criptomoneda que ha invadido el dominante reinado de Bitcoin en la darknet.

No se me escapa la ironía de que, al escribir sobre el prolífico ascenso de Monero en los mercados ilícitos, yo mismo estoy contribuyendo al culto del moonboyismo de Monero. Esta no es mi intención, pero como maximalista del mercado de la darknet, está claro qué efectivo peer-to-peer es el campeón de los pesos pesados. El material gráfico que he elegido para este proyecto muestra el icónico camello de Silk Road reinterpretado con un tono naranja intenso y la inocente personificación Monero-chan, simbolizando la notable transición hacia Monero con el tiempo. Pero también representa el cambio de marea del efectivo peer-to-peer, que ha sido golpeado por las regulaciones, pero que también se ha adaptado y mejorado en consecuencia. Monero contraataca con un gancho que ha hecho tambalearse al Estado, pero esta pelea no termina en unos pocos asaltos. Debemos estar vigilantes y ser intransigentes, porque el moonboyismo corromperá a Monero como lo hizo con Bitcoin si no andamos con cuidado.

Entonces, ¿cómo debemos contraatacar? Podemos examinar cómo reaccionó la comunidad involucrada con Samourai Wallet para darnos una idea de cómo los veteranos de una generación anterior afrontaban las repercusiones de un proyecto de código abierto con escasez económica. Lo que vimos no es exactamente tranquilizador. El contraste entre los tradicionalistas y la avalancha de novatos con la que lidiaron es la misma división que hemos ilustrado en este manifiesto, y resulta llamativo cómo esta diferencia de opinión parecía inexorable aquel entonces. Bitcoin, que se había beneficiado enormemente en lo financiero de su innovador reconocimiento mainstream, había perdido casi toda su intensidad, y para compensar, los cypherpunks restantes en Bitcoin se dedicaron a burlarse de cualquiera que se cruzara en su camino; y tuvieron éxito. Samourai Wallet fue en muchos sentidos un punto de reunión para los cypherpunks que hacían todo lo posible para luchar contra Saylor y su turba enloquecida. Durante un tiempo, fue un oasis en un desierto de apuestas degeneradas. Lo que la cultura de Samourai Wallet aportó fue una clara distinción entre las dos escuelas de pensamiento que no pueden coexistir: el proestatista frente al cypherpunk; la codicia frente a la utilidad; el moonboy frente al maximalista del mercado de la darknet.

Pero la tragedia que enfrenta el efectivo peer-to-peer es que el moonboyismo es inevitable. A diferencia de los proyectos de software libre como VLC, Debian o PostgreSQL, las criptomonedas son escasas, y con esa escasez vienen inversiones potencialmente lucrativas. Y así, con Monero, está claro que su oferta artificialmente limitada, así como su creciente influencia, pueden tentar a los moonboys a apoyar el proyecto, buscando el “próximo Bitcoin” que produzca ganancias alucinantes. Bitcoin, para ellos, es lo que compran y guardan los boomers anticuados. Monero es transgresor y temible. El ciclo se repite, con la ola de inversores fraudulentos que predican sus nuevas creencias de que la privacidad es realmente importante, como si realmente les importara. Aunque, ciertamente, su inversión tiene mérito, porque el uso en los mercados de la darknet es el estatus más poderoso que puede alcanzar el efectivo peer-to-peer. Una criptomoneda que se use en los mercados de la darknet es probablemente lo que querremos en el futuro. Es un contrapeso al dinero fíat, una cobertura virtual y un banco suizo digital; incluso yo debo conceder que el moonboy tiene un buen argumento.

Sin embargo, al maximalista del mercado de la darknet no le preocupa el precio, sino la filosofía. Somos un grupo curtido, cypherpunks que hemos visto el ciclo de vida de Bitcoin desarrollarse con sus aspectos positivos y negativos y, por lo tanto, somos conscientes de los peligros que nos esperan. Porque así como el gobierno más pequeño inevitablemente se convierte en el más grande, Bitcoin también fue corrompido por el sistema que debía reemplazar. Pero lo que no puede reemplazarse es nuestro idealismo implacable, ese criptoanarquismo ardiente que se resiste a la amenaza de una ciberdistopía. Si nuestras creencias y protocolos son atacados, estos se endurecen aún más, cifrados de forma irreconocible, se entierran más profundamente en la maleza. Detrás de todo el ruido de las criptomonedas, el ímpetu constante creado por los mercados de la darknet no puede subestimarse, porque mientras la vida continúe, estos mercados existirán, empujados por la invención del efectivo peer-to-peer. El espíritu del criptoanarquismo sobrevive con él, se revitaliza con él, y con el tiempo el efectivo peer-to-peer se filtrará en todos los aspectos de las finanzas tradicionales, tal como el cifrado ha logrado hacerlo con las redes de internet y los ordenadores. Así que, como maximalista del mercado de la darknet, ¡no invertimos en bags de criptomonedas, sino en idealismo puro! Y hacemos esto no por la riqueza generacional, sino porque nuestras futuras generaciones dependerán de nosotros.

xenu@antimoonboy.com (xenu) — Mon, 01 Jan 0001 00:00:00 +0000

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xenu@antimoonboy.com (xenu) — Mon, 01 Jan 0001 00:00:00 +0000

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xenu@antimoonboy.com (xenu) — Mon, 01 Jan 0001 00:00:00 +0000

Interviews

Here is a collection interviews that I have done. If you would like to have me appear on your podcast/show, email me at xenu@antimoonboy.com

BTC Takeover 10/25/2025 - Youtube

Digital Cash Network 10/17/2025 - Youtube

Monerotalk 8/15/2025 - Official Site | Youtube

Alex Anarcho 7/8/2025 - Official Site

Libre Solutions 7/7/2025 - Official Site | Substack

Monerotalk 4/10/2025 - Youtube | Rumble

Outlaw Crypto Podcast 3/3/25 - Website | Rumble

Monerotopia 10/12/24 - Youtube | Odysee

xenu@antimoonboy.com (xenu) — Mon, 01 Jan 0001 00:00:00 +0000

There are currently two shirts available. I am selling these primarily using Xmr Bazaar, however, I will be happy to sell them peer-to-peer if you would rather email me at xenu@antimoonboy.com. Please view the XMR Bazaar links below for more information on price and sizes available.

Darknet Market Maximalism Camel Shirt $30 + shipping https://xmrbazaar.com/listing/FJNk

The iconic symbol of The Silk Road has been re-imagined with a black backdrop, a sharp orange hue, and innocent Monero-chan. This is a must have for any darknet market maximalist.

Anti Moonboy Genesis Block Shirt $30 + shipping https://xmrbazaar.com/listing/daQr

If Anti Moonboy were to have a genesis block, it would probably look something like this. Mirroring the aesthetic of the Darknet Market Maximalism artwork, it features orange font over a black tee. This satire will perplex many but your fellow anti moonboys will have a laugh.

xenu@antimoonboy.com (xenu) — Mon, 01 Jan 0001 00:00:00 +0000

Here is the link to the matrix chat: https://matrix.to/#/#antimoonboy:matrix.org